Empathic listening: keys to understanding this skill and why it matters

As is well known, hearing is not the same as listening; and to achieve a deep understanding of what someone tells us, as well as a successful communication, It is necessary to completely turn to the other person, with their specific needs and approaches.

In this sense, empathic listening is an indispensable element to interact properly and efficiently with our environment: both when dealing with the people around us as well as to learn from our mistakes when interacting with the rest of society, reconsider our point of view and improve as people.

• Related article: "The 28 types of communication and their characteristics"

What is empathic listening?

One of the key concepts to take into account when enhancing our social skills is empathy. It is a set of aptitudes and skills that allow us both to recognize emotional states in others and to adapt to them, assuming the value of that set of feelings that, although we do not experience directly, are also of great importance to us, when we share a space with those people.

Thus, being empathetic implies not only making relatively accurate estimates about what others feel, but also adopting a constructive attitude towards that psychological reality that we perceive in others, looking for points of assemblage between ours and that of those people.

With what we have seen so far, we can begin to understand what empathic listening consists of; it's about the ability to actively caring for and understanding another person, also taking into account his feelings, emotions, his non-verbal language and all the implications and subtexts that the message he transmits to us may have.

This ability allows us to put ourselves in the place of our interlocutor and deeply analyze both their intentions and their needs, as well as his internal emotional reality: his possible suffering or frustration, what interests him, his motivations, what makes him distrust, etc.

Empathic listening is, without a doubt, one of the most necessary social skills to relate in a way functional with our environment, to establish healthy relationships and also to establish alliances and dynamics of synergy.

In addition to helping us in the social aspect with others, empathic listening also exerts a positive influence on ourselves and helps us to improve in a wide variety of personal, emotional and behavioral aspects, since it gives us information about how others deal with their emotions, their problems and their projects and delusions.

• You may be interested in: "What is emotional intelligence?"

How does empathic listening help us improve as people?

Relating in an empathic way with our environment and actively listening to other people has very positive effects for the day to day and helps us to achieve the best version of ourselves on various levels and both in the short and long term.

Empathic listening is a necessary skill both to put ourselves in the other person's shoes and to understand the changing dynamics of people and groups of people around us, whether they are our loved ones, co-workers or superiors in the workplace.

Some of the main benefits of applying it to our lives are the following:

• It enriches our philosophy of life, by leading us to adopt other points of view.
• It leads us to avoid the struggle of egos and to look for things in common.
• It is a good way to understand how context influences people's emotional state.
• It is a source of constant intellectual challenges that stimulates us and fuels our personal development.

A) Yes, be sensitive to the mental reality of those around us not only intellectually, but also emotionally, It is a very necessary skill to respond to possible changes both in the personal and work environment, or even to anticipate the needs of our environment. Which allows us to adapt successfully to the demands of the day to day and achieve better results at all levels.

How does empathic listening help question our beliefs?

In addition to helping us improve both personally and socially, empathic listening is also a social skill that favors the questioning of our own ideas and beliefs and helps us to reflect on our way of seeing the world.

This is so because it allows us to put ourselves in the place of the other, to value other ways of thinking and ways alternatives of conceiving the problems and needs and ultimately, new ways of interpreting the world. This is a very suitable starting point to enrich our vision of reality, correct mistakes and anticipate the way in which others can react in certain situations.

Similarly, active listening is a tool that allows you to change a preconceived opinion about other people and go beyond clichés and prejudices by assuming how others think and feel.

In summary

As we have seen, enhancing the skills associated with empathic listening is key. not only to improve our way of relating in personal and professional life, but also as a tool for personal development and learning. Training in them brings advantages in key moments and also in day to day.

Bibliographic references:

• Horse, V. (1983). Training manual and evaluation of social skills. Madrid: XXI century.
• Moreno-Jiménez, B., Blanco-Donoso, L.M., Aguirre-Camacho, A., Rivas, S. de, Herrero, M. (2014). Social skills for new organizations. Behavioral Psychology. Autonomous University of Madrid.
• Serrato-García, M. TO. (2019) Do you want to be a leader in the digital age? These are the 11 skills that you must develop. Spain. Entrepeneur.