How to be nicer: 8 practical tips

It is curious that something that is totally free costs us so much to demonstrate. It's time to be nice! If we are not going to do it for others, at least let's do it for ourselves, since kind people have it easier in life.

Kindness opens doors. A kind person has more facilities than a person who is not, simply because he is more pleasant to his social circle and can have more opportunities and benefits from him.

Today we are going to see the keys to learning how to be kinder with the rest.

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How to be kinder in your personal relationships?

Relationships are a source of satisfaction and well-being, which is why we must maintain and pamper them. Our social support network, made up of friends, family and other important people, helps us to confess our emotions and opinions, releasing stress. Not having that social network is a problem since we keep our emotions that can degenerate into a lot of emotional instability, aggravated by a feeling of loneliness and incomprehension.

Kindness is a positive personal attitude both for us as individuals and for those around us.. It is that energy that keeps us connected to the rest of society, that protects us from loneliness and associated discomfort. Kindness is what strengthens our interpersonal relationships, fundamental to our mental health considering that we spend most of our time interacting with other people.

We depend on others and that is why we must be kind. Everyone influences our lives in some way: parents, children, siblings, subordinates, bosses, the one at the gas station… Making others feel comfortable will bring us many benefits and advantages. People are more likely to do favors for those they like, those who feel they respect them. So we are going to see some tips to see how to be more friendly:

1. Call him by his name

If you know what that person's name is, call her by her name. Almost everyone prefers to be called by her name rather than by some generic appellation. Calling by name strengthens the relationship and personalizes the deal, and is much more polite than calling someone "girl / o", "hey you", "pretty", "macho", "uncle" and others

There can always be an exception, but as a general rule those phrases are usually quite humiliating and even reifying. If it is a person we see almost every day, the minimum is to learn her name after so long. If it has happened that she has learned yours and you still do not know hers, you can look like a complete cretin.

It may happen that the other person has an unusual name or that it sounds "ethnic" to you. You may have used that excuse not to bother learning her name, even though the other person has repeated over and over again how to pronounce it, wasting their valuable time, patience and health mental. I can assure you that having to repeat to someone day in and day out what my name is because they have not bothered to pay attention and memorize four phonemes does not invite me to waste my time with that person.

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2. Always use the magic words

Education is something that, in my humble opinion, is dying out in our 21st century.

Is it so hard to be polite to others? Our language has magical words and expressions that soften requests, turning imperative orders into friendly requests. It costs nothing to start the requests with phrases like "please", "would you be so nice ...", "would you mind ..." and so on. They are expressions of kindness, respect, and consideration for others. It doesn't matter if it's a co-worker, your family, or a waiter at the corner bar. Speak politely. Others will appreciate it very much.

3. Give back the details

In this world there are people who are more detailed than others, and that is not a bad thing. For some of us, it does not come naturally to us to give small gifts to others, and that does not mean that we are inconsiderate or bad people, it simply does not come out of our interior to be like that.

However, if someone has made us a small detail in the form of a gift, paying us a coffee or watering our plants without asking for anything in return, it is okay to return it. It is true that he has not made it to us so that we can return it to him, but socially it is ugly that we do not give back in some way. That is why it is so important to return the details, even in a modest and minimal way. Next time you see her, pay her for coffee or gift her a bag of candy. Have details with who has them with you.

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4. Smile, that opens doors

The look, the smile, the gestures... that is, body language is a communication that, although silent, conveys many meanings. It is not the same to say something with a serious face than to say the same smiling. Depending on how we accompany them, our words can become the most offensive of insults or genuine flattery. Smiles open doors, since we see smiling people as more attainable, more open to having a conversation and listening.

5. Actively listen

If someone speaks to us, it is best to let them finish before giving our opinion. This principle that seems so basic is seldom respected. It is difficult to consider a person as kind if he does not stop interrupting us, he does not let us say everything we have to say to him.

Be patient, let me finish, do not anticipate what I am commenting on and do not even think about finishing the sentence yourself. Interruptions generate insecurity and frustration to your interlocutor, emotions that will not invite him to have more conversations with you.

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6. Do not be so suspicious

It may sound very innocent, but it is good to expect positive things from others. People who distrust others tend to have more trouble establishing quality relationships. The fear that others will betray you prevents you from being completely honest with themThey find it difficult to share and they do not dare to maintain deep relationships.

It is true that in the world there are dishonest, deceitful and disloyal people, but it is not the general rule. Protecting yourself all the time from others will only bring us isolation and negativity. You have to open up to othersTherefore, do not be so suspicious and expect good things. Most people do not harbor evil within.

7. Ask how was your day

One of the ways to show true kindness is to show concern for the lives of others. Everyone has their own story to tell, but sometimes they can't share it.

However, if someone asks you, if someone shows interest in knowing what happened to you and how you feel, the person feels that someone cares, that someone values ​​how their day has gone. That is why it is a very good idea to ask our acquaintances how the day has gone, they will surely thank us and we will make them feel better.

8. Joy to all

A sense of humor is a powerful magnet that attracts good relationships.. Although it is not synonymous with kindness, it does contribute to others seeing us as accessible people, people with whom it is pleasant to spend time. We should not confuse this with being the funny one in the office or making fun of others, but with seeing the funny part of life. Being cheerful, fun and carefree is a very prosocial way of behaving.

In contrast, serious-looking people appear difficult to access, people with whom it seems that it will be difficult to relate. You do not know very well what mood they are in today, nor do you know very well how to address them. This makes it very difficult to interact with them, in addition to the uncertainty and fear of how they may react causes us stress. We can get intimate, and a person who intimidates, even if he is not a bad person or has done anything wrong to us, does not seem nice to us.