The importance of having good communication with teens

When we talk about the growth process that takes us from childhood to adulthood, many times it tends to happen forgetting that this is not a purely biological process, limited to the maturation of organs and cellular tissues of the Body.

And it is that the biological maturation process is as important as the one that is reflected in physical changes. In this sense, it should be remembered that the human mind grows and expands not through the processing of nutrients and vitamins over time, but through socialization, a phenomenon much less individual and that is not limited to what happens within the organism, but links it to its environment.

And in this aspect, communication is key, since together with experimentation and exploration of the world, it is the main vehicle for learning. Thus it is important to establish good communication dynamics with our children during their childhood and adolescence: it is something that allows them to mature emotionally and socially.

• Related article: "The 3 stages of adolescence"

What are the benefits of maintaining good communication with your teenager?

Taking into account that many of the emotional and relational problems experienced as a family basically have to do with an inappropriate communicative style, taking care of this last element is able to offer an almost unlimited amount of Benefits. However, if we focus on the area of ​​raising children in adolescent age, the following advantages should be highlighted.

1. Lets you learn through us

As much as schools are known for dedicating most of their efforts to enabling the students who attend them to learn about different important topics, the truth is that the young people who fill them are constantly learning, many times without realizing it, even beyond the hours lectures.

It is natural that this is the case: our species is characterized by its predisposition to learn in practically any context. Unlike many invertebrate animals, which are capable of repeating the same mistake over and over until they die of exhaustion after a few hours, we are very good at being aware of what is happening around us and trying adapt to it.

Now, this also has a negative side: we are able to learn and internalize behavior or thought patterns that are counterproductive to medium and long term, and since they do not harm us immediately, we repeat them over and over again without realizing that we are participating in the problem that affects us. Fortunately, as we gain experience we learn more about our mistakes.

But... what about adolescents, who have a great predisposition to learn but do not have much experience? In this case, communication is key. If we are able to transmit well the knowledge that we have been acquiring throughout our years of life, we can save them many unnecessary setbacks.

2. Helps you develop self-knowledge and achieve balanced self-esteem

Contrasting ideas with us can help them question beliefs about themselves, things who believed about the concept of "I" that was limiting them and led them to underestimate themselves, for example. Having the point of view of an adult allows them to see things with a very different perspective from that of adolescents, who normally adhere to a set of values ​​and beliefs different from those of others, both due to a matter of maturity and a matter of differences between generations.

• You may be interested in: "Confinement with adolescents: 8 tips"

3. Lets you understand her place in the family

Failure to communicate well with a teenage son or daughter may mean that he or she experiences family life as an encouraging phenomenon., a space that does not belong to him and in which he feels the need to behave in a feigned way (or, to isolate themselves and interact as little as possible with the rest of the inhabitants of the house, so as not to have to force their behaviour). On the other hand, if communication flows well, he will be able to understand his role in the house, and feel that he is a respected member of it.

4. Help the home rules to be followed

Another of the implications of maintaining good communication with an adolescent has to do with her predisposition to comply with the rules of the home. And is that Whether you respect them or not depends above all on whether you understand them, for which the involvement of the elders of the house is usually necessary.

5. Promotes conflict resolution

Of course, it should not be forgotten that conflict resolution between parents and children adolescents is much easier if there is already good communication during the day to day. If not, the negotiations and reconciliations that are often necessary to settle these issues are met with more initial resistance.

On the other hand, the lack of moments in common to talk also makes it easier for adolescents to not take into account the interests of the other members of the family, so that establishing a correct communication flow is also a factor in preventing conflicts.

Do you want to have psychotherapeutic support?

If you are interested in having professional psychological support for yourself or your son or daughter, get in touch with us.

On PSiCOBAi we offer child-adolescent and adult therapy, as well as family therapy. We work from face-to-face sessions in our center in Majadahonda or through online sessions by video call.

Bibliographic references:

• Kim J.; McHale S.M.; Osgood D.W.; Grouter A.C. (2006). Longitudinal course and family correlates of sibling relationships from childhood through adolescence. Child Development. 77 (6): pp. 1746 - 1761.
• Matalí, J. (2016). Adolescents with behavioral disorders. How can we detect them? What is to be done? Barcelona: Sant Joan de Déu Hospital.
• Navarrete, L.; Ossa, C. (2013). Parenting styles and quality of family life in adolescents with disruptive behaviors. Psychological sciences.
• Pantic, I. (2014). Online Social Networking and Mental Health. Cyberpsychology, Behavior and Social Networking, 17 (10), 652-657.
• Reyes, A. (2009). The secondary school as a space for the construction of youth identities. Mexican journal of educational research.