Gerontophilia: types, symptoms and treatments

Usually, most people tend to be sexually interested in people who are close to or similar to your own (up to about a decade above or below is usually the most habitual). But there are also couples of very discordant ages. Although it is not very common nowadays, this has nothing pathological in itself if said union is between people older than age they consent and in which there is no type of abuse or use of circumstances that limit the ability to consent.

However, there are cases of people who present intense sexual fantasies and are attracted exclusively or almost exclusively by stimuli that most of is considered anomalous by society and generally includes non-consenting people or animals, inanimate objects, or pain / submission relationships between peers bed. When this attraction causes discomfort to the person or to othersIt is practically the only type of stimulus that generates sexual attraction and / or generates limitations in the life of the subject or of his sexual partner. We will be talking about a paraphilia.

Within the paraphilias we can find a type that, although it is rare, is subject to some controversy given that their inclusion within the paraphilias could only generate discomfort or limitations to the subject himself or to the co-worker: gerontophilia or attraction to the very old. It is about her that we are going to talk about in this article.

• Related article: "Filias and paraphilias: definition, types and characteristics"

Gerontofilia: basic definition

Sexual attraction to the elderly or the elderly is called gerontophilia being the subject who feels this attraction considerably younger. The age difference that is usually considered is at least 35 years of differential age The person in question has fantasies recurrent sexual relations with the elderly, this characteristic being the one that exclusively or almost exclusively generates arousal sexual.

It is important to bear in mind and note that when we talk about gerontophilia we are not talking about a spontaneous infatuation with someone of advanced age. A person with gerontofilia feels an attraction that is not so much derived from knowing a person but from the fact that they are old. In other words, what awakens the sex drive is that of an elderly or elderly personregardless of what the person is like.

As a paraphilia, the interest maintained is in principle purely sexual, although in some cases the gerontóphile and the object of her desire may maintain a romantic connection.

Classification of gerontophilia as a paraphilia can be controversial, because paraphilia is often confused with having a relationship with someone much older. But the truth is that one thing does not imply the other: you can have a relationship with an elderly person and the person who does it does not have to fall into the category of gerontóphile. In fact, gerontophilia is a paraphilia only if it generates clinically significant discomfort, if it involves a functional limitation in the day to day of the or if the only stimulus that arouses sexual desire is old age as such.

• You may be interested: "The 3 phases of old age, and their physical and psychological changes

Basic types

There are two basic types of gerentofilia, or rather we could find mainly two types of attraction to the elderly.

1. Alphamegamy

The first one is alphamegamy, in which there would be a sexual attraction on the part of a young person (man or woman) towards much older men and within the third age.

2. Matronolagnia

The other type corresponds to sexual attraction to elderly women. by much younger men or women, receiving in this case the name of matronolagnia.

Causes of gerontophilia at the level of paraphilia

Although the relationships between people of different ages do not have to imply the presence of gerontophilia, in the cases in which we are talking about a paraphilia, the question of what makes this fixation on the elderly appear. In this sense, there are multiple explanations that can be found. It should be noted that we are talking about paraphilia, not the fact of falling in love with someone who happens to be of that age.

One of them tells us about the presence of an insecure personality, dependent or in need of protection, which he would see in the The fact of being old is a stimulus that has traditionally been associated with wisdom, experience, protection and warmth. This vision of old age can cause some people to have a certain sexual desire for these characteristics, which make them feel safe.

It is also possible that it arises in the context of people who feel unable to successfully relate to people their age (something that also happens in some cases of pedophilia).

Another possibility arises from conditioning: it is possible that in a situation of sexual arousal the image or some other type of stimulus related to old age, which may subsequently have been positively reinforced (for example, through masturbation).

Related to this, cases have also been observed in which the existence of this type of attraction stems from traumatic experiences, such as sexual abuse in childhood, in which the sexual act with people much older than the subject has been normalized in some way. Sexual arousal has been associated with the difference in age or with old age, the attraction towards the elderly generally acquiring a certain compulsive tinge.

Likewise, another possible reason can be found in the fragility of the elderly or the fact of having someone to whom care: the elderly are generally people with weak health, who may require help and may have some dependence. Some people may find it sexually stimulating the fact of being necessary and helping the elderly.

The opposite pole would be found in the search for domination-submission relationships: an old man can be more fragile than his partner, something that puts the gerontóphile in a position of certain superiority at the level of power physical. In this case, special precaution must be taken to the possibility that there is an attempt to abuse the elderly person in question, there may be humiliating components that seek to subdue the elderly.

Treatment

The treatment of any paraphilia is a complex matter, which requires taking into account a large number of factors and variables.

In the case of gerontophilia, the first thing to take into account is if there really is a paraphilia as such, something that can be more complex than it seems at first glance. In the first place and as we have already repeated throughout the article, having a partner of an age very different from one's own does not make the subject into gerontófilo, this being only a paraphilia when it supposes a clinically significant discomfort, limits the life of the person or generates damage to the couple. Thus, couples of discordant ages with age difference must be excluded, as well as relationships based on interest.

But even if there is discomfort, it is worth assessing why, since the experience of discomfort may be generated solely by social disapproval or the internalization of it.

In the case of working with the paraphilia itself, it will be necessary to assess what it is that makes old age for the subject is the practically exclusive object of desire, what aspects it considers relevant and the repercussions that this situation has on he.

Also Aspects such as safety and self-esteem will be worked on, as well as social and problem-solving skills, in cases where attraction is solely due to being considered unable to deal with people of similar age to the chronological or in case what attracts is the need to feel necessary.

Another type of intervention will be necessary if it arises from the experience of traumatic experiences, which must be worked on. Also in the event that it is due to aspects related to power and submission, being especially vigilant of the existence of any possible abuse towards the elderly with whom they have Relationship.

But all of it just might be necessary if it is something that has not been chosen and is experienced with discomfort on the part of the parties involved. In another case, it must be borne in mind that after all and when it is such, love has no age

Bibliographic references:

• Ball, H. N. (2005). Sexual offending on elderly women: A review. Journal of Forensic Psychiatry and Psychology.
• Janssen, D.F. (2014). Gerontophilia: A Forensic Archaism. Sexual Offender Treatment. 9 (1).
• Kaul, A.; Duffy, S. (1991). "Gerontophilia: A case report". Medicine, Science and the Law. 31: 110–114.