"Porqueyolovalguismo": the narcissist's philosophy of life

We have spoken several times about narcissism. This way of being close to the pathological refers to those whose admiration for themselves is exaggerated.

Of course, this way of thinking also crystallizes in actions and attitudes that are palpable on a day-to-day basis. As the classic slogan of the shampoo brand said The realThey are individuals who move through life showing off the maxim "because I'm worth it." This is where the concept of “cosyolovalguismo” was born, which I will stop to explain in today's article..

Opportunities and context

Let's contextualize. Both in Spain and in most Latin American nations, we have suffered serious economic crises that have plunged us into a cultural conjuncture where a job is almost a blessing. With an unemployment rate of over 25% and almost 50% for young people in southern Europe, it is not surprising that their mentality about work has changed.

In the previous context, of relative abundance of job opportunities, workers had the possibility of rejecting certain offers that do not meet certain requirements (salary, hours, remoteness)... Workers could not accept certain jobs that did not provide them with a stimulus; After all, in a short time they could find something more in line with their preferences and requirements. After the ravages of the crisis, the situation is no longer like that.

Unfortunately, and until there is a Universal Basic Income that guarantees the material subsistence of citizens, we have to continue working "whatever it takes" to be able to support ourselves. In a scenario of total scarcity of job opportunities, this mentality has almost completely disappeared: we are totally doomed to accept any job proposal, even if the remuneration or other characteristics of the offer are to our dislike.

The "cosyolovalguismo" in the culture of no-effort

Of course, that there is an urgent need to accept any job offer is very bad news for our society. It is a clear symptom that a country does not have sufficient development of the productive fabric to provide a variety of proposals and projects (work and life) to its citizens.

How do we react to this situation? Most people try to adapt to this new reality and, resigned, they assume that there is no choice but to go ahead and accept "whatever there is". It is a mentality that runs the risk of falling into what the psychologist Bertrand Regader rate as ‘Satisfied slave syndrome’, that is, in a neuroticism adapted to a directly unacceptable situation.

At the other extreme we find the "cosyolovalguismo". Individuals who basically believe that they deserve all the best and who are not willing to accept that their employer does not pay them what they think they deserve. They are individuals who have a very high concept of themselves, to the point of showing aggressive tendencies to those who do not recognize and praise their supposed ‘qualities’; people who believe that this planet has been made available to them for their full enjoyment and enjoyment, so that they can squeeze out of it as many benefits as possible and, if possible, at a cost of personal effort equivalent to zero.

We are talking about a symptom not only present in the workplace, but generalized to practically all aspects of life in which the individual "because yolovalguista" can display his very peculiar way of to be.

The attitudes of the individual "Porqueyolovalgo"

We are not going to start looking for culprits or causes, because we do not consider it to be the function of this writing. However, it would not be unreasonable to point out that, in the globalized world where we live (in which concepts such as "privacy" or "intimacy" have been relegated to oblivion), social networks have had an influence in accentuating the behavior of many people who already had a tendency to a raised ego.

The possibility of publishing our experiences on platforms such as Facebook, Instagram or Twitter has caused a change in the needs of these people anxious for the external approval: the search for "likes" or positive comments from friends in the social networks in photos, comments or personal opinions contributes to enlarging the ego and the self-esteem of those who receive it, thereby reinforcing the possibility of repeating the action in the future, always with the mindset of getting as much impact possible.

The more attention received, the more reasons these people will have to assume that they should tell more about themselves and show the greatest number of aspects ‘Relevant’ of their day-to-day life that they can, in an assumed fantasy that their “followers” ​​are eager to know what is new in the life of the "because I'm worth it".

• Related article: "Pride: the 6 common traits of vain people"

Protagonists of his own life... and that of others

In their mentality, in which they are the absolute protagonists and everything revolves around them, the "Porqueyolovalgo" legitimize their pride based on a false belief (but very real for them) that they should be thanked for having existed and for gifting others with their mere presence, as a new form of vassalage in the XXI century, in which we are expected to bow down and kiss the ground on which they tread and applaud all their behavior, no matter how reprehensible it may be. be.

As we say in Spain, these subjects are "delighted to meet", which is the expression par excellence that catalogs and defines the attitude towards life of those who consider that their way of thinking, criteria, competence or talent is better than those of the rest.

By way of conclusion: rejecting moral superiority

Of course, this text is not intended to put in the spotlight those people who love themselves or consider that they can contribute to the society in which they are integrated. A distinction must be made between a healthy self-esteem and a bloated and exaggerated self-esteem.

What is reprehensible about individuals "because they are worthy" is their tendency to exhibit their moral superiority over other people. Free will cannot be justified blindly in a context of coexistence and sharing of common spaces and resources. As we said at the beginning of this writing, although many consider that they can have at their pleasure the greatest number of benefits without making any contribution in this regard (we do not know if due to lack of sensitivity, maturity, empathy or pure and simple unconsciousness), the rest of us are not obliged nor should we allow that there are subjects who trample our rights or try to justify their privileges based on their arrogance.