Rebellion in adolescence: why it appears and what to do

Either because we have lived it in our moment or because we have children or relatives at that moment of development, most of the population already knows that adolescence is a complicated stage of to live. It is frequent that during this period of development and maturation quarrels, arguments or even conflicts appear in the relationship between parents and children, or between adolescents and adults in general. Rebellion in adolescence it is one of the main points that can make contact between the youngest and the adults difficult.

But although it can sometimes be frustrating for both “sides”, it is not something strange or bad: a large majority of people have had at some point some kind of rebellious and challenging phase towards the established, being something not only frequent but also healthy for the development of one's own identity. In this article we are going to talk briefly about what this phase of rebellion and how to react to it in education and family context.

• Related article: "The 3 stages of adolescence"

Adolescence: a complex stage

The first thing we have to take into account when talking about adolescence is the fact that, regardless of whether there is rebellion or not, we are facing a strange and complicated moment. Adolescence is the most important period of maturation and growth of our development, this stage being the step towards adulthood from childhood and passing approximately between eleven and twenty years of age.

In adolescence, puberty arrives and the body begins to undergo an accelerated transformation. Sexual characteristics appear, our voice changes, our size and strength increase greatly and great hormonal changes occur that alter our mood and behavior.

At the same time, the childhood stage is beginning to be left behind and increasingly complicated, more adult demands from society begin to appear. Some responsibility for their own actions begins to be demanded and more and more importance is given to social relationships.

Parents stop seeing themselves as perfect beings and they begin to see their limitations and the differences between them and the adolescent, despite the fact that they continue to be dependent on them. In general, there is a certain distance from the family and friends come to focus the attention and preference of the future adult.

Thinking also changes, both as an effect of brain maturation changes and due to the psychosocial changes derived from them. It will be during adolescence when most of the executive functions are developed, such as the capacity for planning, goal orientation, initiation of control and inhibition of behavior, the organization of one's own activity or mental flexibility.

It is also a stage of exploration: in addition to all of the above, new possibilities are opening up and a greater openness and search for experiences appears. Likewise, little by little, identity will be generated as different behavioral patterns are explored and the core values ​​that will guide our behavior are selected.

Taking all this into account, adolescence can be very distressing and generate great tension in those who suffer it, being able to react with a certain hostility and it is common for a certain rebellion to appear.

Rebellion in adolescents: why does it happen?

Observing the previous point, we can identify and take into account some of the reasons why rebellion can appear in adolescents. Some of them are explained below.

1. Biological and hormonal changes

Part of the rebellion present in the adolescent has a biological origin (although this should not serve as a justification for undesirable behaviors). On the one hand, the brain and especially the frontal lobe and especially the prefrontal are not yet fully developed, this being the main biological substrate that allows the development of skills such as the ability to inhibit response, control and management capacity or motivation and goal orientation.

It also highlights the fact that the adolescent brain is much more sensitive to stimulation of neurotransmitters such as dopamine, something that promotes the experimentation and the search for pleasant sensations (being something that favors, for example, taking risky and dangerous attitudes for one's own Health).

In addition to this, we must also take into account the presence of hormonal changes: the testosterone is associated, for example, with an increase in competitiveness and aggressiveness, while the hormonal changes that occur during the menstrual cycle (which appears at puberty) can more easily cause irritability and changes in the state psychic.

2. Egocentric thinking

Another reason for adolescent rebellion is the assumption of a typical egocentric thought of the age: the adolescent believes himself invulnerable and omnipotent, being excessively confident in their own ideas and presenting biases that diminish the importance of information contrary to them.

It is more complex to detect and accept the existence of alternative visions of reality that are equally valid (although they may be opposite), considering them false or wrong.

3. Search for autonomy and identity creation

Another of the main causes of rebellion is the search for autonomy and the creation of personal identity. The adolescent is at a stage where you need to experiment in order to determine who you are, performing different behaviors and observing whether or not they adjust to their values ​​and preferences or the effects they have.

Rebellion can also be a search for autonomy, an attempt to get authority figures to recognize you not as a child or in a submissive role but as an active and independent agent. He may be asking for a reduction of the limits existing until now or trying to achieve to observe himself as an independent subject.

While rebellion often seen as frustrating or as a response to an unrecognized authority, the truth is that the rebellious adolescent may also deep down be asking to be put on limits that indicate that he is right or wrong, how far he can go or what is expected of he.

5. Confusion in the face of changes and demands

We have already indicated that the adolescent is immersed in a stage of continuous changes and contradictions: he is not a child but he is not an adult, he is They demand responsibilities that did not exist until now and although they want autonomy, they also still want the affection of the environment family.

It is also common that they do not know where to direct their efforts, something that can generate great frustration. Likewise, the adolescent tends to feel misunderstood, his experience not being shared by others in the same way or with the same intensity. Rebellion can also appear as a response of frustration in the face of these contradictions and sensations.

6. Interpersonal and social conflicts

During adolescence it is common for different interpersonal conflicts to appear. It is the stage in which friendships are most important, displacing the family in terms of focus of affection, and also in which the first couple relationships begin to occur. in addition academic life becomes more demanding, which can lead to frustrations. All of this can have an effect on the adolescent, with rebellion appearing as a means of escape or emotional ventilation.

7. More severe problems

The phenomena discussed so far are normative, but we cannot ignore the possibility that rebellion or irritability may appear in response to aversive or painful situations which are not the usual ones. For example, the experience of bullying, consumption of toxins, abuse of some kind or suffering from a mental health problem such as depression.

What to do with a rebellious teenager?

It can be difficult to relate to a rebellious teenager, but the first thing to keep in mind is that except exceptions, rebellion is actually positive since in the long run it will help them find their own way in a Independent. The fact that there was rebellion does not imply that you stop loving your environment or that he has stopped needing her protection.

We must first try to be empathetic and understand the profound changes that the adolescent is undergoing. The fluid communication between environment and adolescent it is also very important. It is not about forcing him to speak if he really does not want to, but to show that he is willing to listen. Sharing your own experience can also be helpful (all adults have been through adolescence, after all) when they can have some kind of role model, although unsolicited advice is usually not good received.

And almost more important than speaking is listening, being relevant that the child feels heard. The adolescent he is no longer a child and his opinion should be taken into accountIn addition to the fact that active listening favors the expression of fears and doubts that other types of attitudes would not allow. Likewise, debating and evaluating the opinion regarding different topics can help to better understand each other.

Another aspect to take into account is the social environment in which the minor moves. As we have seen previously friendships have become one of the most important influences, being relevant to favor (without forcing) positive environments and analyze problems such as bullying.

We must also try not to be authoritarian and respect the freedom and autonomy of the adolescent: in In the event of disagreement, negotiation may be an optimal way to find a position that pleases both of you. parts. Prohibition or unjustified punishment will only generate reactance and possible more marked disobedience. Of course, that rebellion is to a certain extent good should not cross certain limits: they should not be tolerated obvious disrespect or assaults, and the fact of negotiating does not imply giving in to everything that want.