6 keys to reducing Christmas anxiety in the middle of a pandemic

It is normal to feel some anxiety at Christmas time, it is an intense period that includes both obligations and the desire to enjoy traditional holidays and family.

Obligations that generate anxiety can be the preparations for these holidays such as buying gifts, visiting stores, organizing agendas with family and friends, and so on. However, this anxiety described corresponds to an adaptive and normal anxiety.

It is important to note that anxiety itself, as an emotion, is necessary. We cannot live without anxiety despite the fact that it is always labeled as "something negative to eliminate." Anxiety helps us prepare for what we think is going to happen, it helps us face a future situation and therefore a certain level of anxiety is adaptive and necessary.

The problem arises when anxiety is high, harmful and maladaptive. This type of maladaptive anxiety is disproportionate to the future situation that we believe will occur, that is, we can assess that something more negative is going to happen than the real probability of it happening and that we are not going to be able to face it. Therefore, we value that we do not have coping resources for what we believe is going to happen and therefore we begin to suffer in the present something that has not happened.

These symptoms may be rapid breathing, increased heart rate, pressure in the chest, and a feeling of choking or a lump in the throat.

• Related article: "Types of Anxiety Disorders and their characteristics"

Maladaptive anxiety this Christmas

The big difference in this Christmas season compared to times before the pandemic is the increase in cases with maladaptive anxiety. It is logical that, after all, an adaptive anxiety typical of Christmas is added to a high anxiety as a result of the COVID pandemic. At the PsicoAlmería Psychology Center we are observing an increase in cases related to high and maladaptive anxiety on these dates.

This anxiety caused by the pandemic has as a consequence an increase in negative thoughts that continually condition us. The most common may be those related to hypervigilance and fear of being infected or infecting someone close. And in relation to these Christmas dates, We may have doubts about whether to stay with relatives or not due to the catastrophic consequences that could arise.

These thoughts carry compatible emotions, that is, when we have negative thoughts the emotions that arise are also those related to emotional discomfort such as anxiety.

And once we experience this symptomatology, our behaviors will be aimed at reducing anxiety, although in Most of the time these behaviors tend not to work as we would like and we cause our anxiety. Why? It's simple: we tend to carry out avoidance and escape behaviors in situations that cause us anxietyThis works for us in the short term because we will feel relief. But, in the long run the problem persists and the anxiety will return with more force.

An example could be the following: If I stay with my relatives at Christmas I could infect someone without knowing it and I would not be able to live with it (thought), I feel wrong to think that would happen (anxiety and symptoms related to anxiety), so I decide that I am not going to meet anyone (behavior and reduction of anxiety).

In the short term, it may feel good to make that decision, and the anxiety will have played a role. But in the long term you can continue to perform avoidance behaviors (Do not meet anyone to avoid contagion), and you will not attend to the needs that you continue to have, such as the need for contact with your family and friends. In this way, the maladaptive anxiety that you have on a personal level will increase more and more when you stop doing things that are necessary and pleasant.

• You may be interested in: "Hypochondria: causes, symptoms and possible treatments"

What can we do to reduce anxiety?

Here are some psychological keys or guidelines that will help you face and reduce maladaptive anxiety.

1. See a professional

It is important that you do not neglect your mental health. If you are in a situation that causes you a lot of discomfort and high anxiety, it is beneficial to go to the psychologist.

Both the psychologist Verónica Valderrama Hernández, as well as her team, will help you solve your maladaptive anxiety. Each person is different, and that is why it is important for them to carry out an adequate assessment of the situation what do you care about. In this way they carry out an effective and adapted therapy to find your emotional well-being.

• Related article: "The 10 benefits of going to psychological therapy"

2. Internal dialogue How do you talk to yourself?

Self-talk is a technique that can help you in times of anxiety. As we have discussed before, thoughts trigger compatible emotions and behaviors.

If we believe that something negative and unpleasant is going to happen and we appreciate that we cannot cope with it, we will feel anxiety and our behavior will be compatible with that anxiety. A good option is a proper dialogue with yourself when those automatic and negative thoughts that trigger your anxiety arise.

Try initially to write down those recurring thoughts, and write down alternative objective thoughts (more focused on reality) next to them. The difference between automatic and rational thoughts is that the former tend to be shorter and more extreme and the latter more objective. Those alternative thoughts that you are going to generate will be aimed at offering you more confidence in yourself. Once you have them written, it is as simple as using them and repeating them when the onset of your anxiety is triggered.

Think about the following: If you only have one thought, the chances of believing it will be high and you will suffer the consequences. If you have more than one thought (the automatic and the alternative that you have created), your mind will not be able to assign as many probabilities to negative thinking because you are offering them different options or hypotheses of a future that really you don't know.

In the example of these Christmas parties, it is not the same to think "if I stay I am going to infect a family member and he will die, it is better not to see the family", to offer you this alternative thinking: “I can postpone meeting a relative who may be a risk group and staying with a limited number along with measures of security".

• You may be interested in: "The 8 higher psychological processes"

3. Mindfulness

The practice of Mindfulness is very useful for cases of anxiety; It is scientifically proven that it provides benefits and advantages in this regard. Mindfulness both formal (with audios) and informal (learning to live in the here and now) will help you reduce maladaptive anxiety.

It's simple, think that anxiety keeps your mind occupied with worries that have not yet occurred, situations that you anticipate will occur. With anxiety it is like living in a negative future, finding yourself in an almost continuous state of alert.

Mindfulness allows you to live with full consciousness, allowing you to live in the present. Mindfulness is a skill that is being trained, and you will be able to redirect your attention in real situations that are happening, this will help you in moments of anxiety. In PsicoAlmería you will find audios and videos to practice Mindfulness.

• Related article: "What is Mindfulness? The 7 answers to your questions "

4. Patience

Anxiety does not disappear suddenly, it is an emotion that lasts for a while, so you must be patient; little by little you will restore your well-being. Think that anxiety plays a survival role, your mind believes that it protects you by causing it (because if anxiety is yours, it is caused by your mind and your body suffers).

You are going to show your mind little by little that it is okay to protect you as long as it is an adaptive anxiety so that it readjusts the maladaptive anxiety.

5. Nice activities

When was the last time you did something for the first time? Take advantage and do something different, or do something that you haven't done for a long time. Try to join in things that make you feel good and in this way you can move away from anxiety.

6. Social and family contact whenever possible

Although we continue to maintain distance with family and acquaintances, do not stray too far. If little by little you feel that you are becoming further away, connect more with your important people, even through technology. This is important in these Christmas holidays in which it is tradition to be with our people.

And finally, remember that when we feel bad we can go to mental health professionals who will help us and understand what the psychologists of PsicoAlmería are like.