The language of emotions

Almost all people, experts and scientists included, classify emotions into two large groups: negative emotions and positive emotions.

This has a logical explanation and a meaning. Basically, some make us feel good and others bad. In other words, it is a classification that responds to what in psychology is called affective valence, which refers to the pleasant or unpleasant subjective sensations that emotions generate in us.

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An alternative classification of emotions

Language is a very powerful tool and conditions thought and, ultimately, behavior and the way we interpret reality. Therefore, by calling some emotions positive and others negative, we are also implicitly saying that the former are good and the latter are bad, since, as a general rule, the positive is considered something good and the negative something bad. Or at least that is how it is conceived in most cultures and societies in the world today.

For this reason, at Happiens we prefer to talk about pleasant and unpleasant emotions, and adaptive and maladaptive emotions.

The first classification is more faithful to the sensation that an emotion produces in us., that is, to its affective valence, but eliminating the judgment on the goodness or badness of said emotion. It consists of grouping them solely on the basis of the subjective experience that they generate in us.

The second classification refers to the function that an emotion fulfills in our lives.: if it serves us and helps us (adaptive) or limits and conditions us (disadaptive). All emotions initially fulfill an adaptive function, that is, they serve a purpose and help us to relate to the environment, to others and to ourselves. However, the way in which we manage an emotion makes its consequences and uses very different, and it can become maladaptive and limiting.

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The importance of meaning

PeterJ. Lang, a psychologist and professor at the Center for the Study of Emotion and Attention at the University of Florida (USA), is one of the leading representatives in the study of emotions. His work reveals that there are no significant differences between the emotional response of people of different genders, countries and cultures. This allows us to affirm that emotions are something universal, something that characterizes the human being as a species.

What does vary is the meaning given to each emotion in different countries and cultures, which in turn affects the situations or behaviors that trigger them.

Thus, for example, if we burp during a meal in Spain, we will surely feel ashamed, because we interpret it as something that is not appropriate for the situation. However, in countries like China or India we would feel good about doing it since there it means that we liked the food and it is something that the rest of the diners would also interpret positively.

As we see, in each culture the same fact has different meanings, which in turn generates different emotions.

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The three forms and manifestation of emotions

Another of Professor Lang's great contributions is the so-called triple emotional response system; a theory formulated in 1968 that explains how emotions are manifested through a cognitive response, another physiological and a third at the behavioral level. Thanks to this model, it is easier to understand how emotions work, their consequences and how we can learn to manage them.

There is an important debate regarding the order of appearance of these three emotional responses: there are who defend that physiological changes occur first, and that generates thoughts and actions concrete; others affirm that thought is the first thing that appears when interpreting and signifying a situation and, from there, changes in the body and behaviors are produced; others believe that...

The truth is that it is a quite interesting and extensive debate, but without much importance for the purpose of this text. Also, time differences in responses can sometimes be milliseconds and other times hours. The truth is that these times will vary greatly depending on the emotion and its intensity, the situation and the person. The important thing, after all, is to be aware that each emotion is manifested through these three ways, since that will help us improve our emotional management. Let's see an example with sadness and how it would manifest itself with three types of response:

1. Cognitive response to sadness

They are the thoughts one has when one is sad. They could be something like "I don't like my life", "I'm never able to do this right", "I don't feel loved"... These thoughts come from the interpretation we make of reality, so we could work to replace them with others and interpret reality from another point of view.

On the other hand, at the cognitive level there are also changes in processes such as attention, memory, concentration or decision making. When we are sad our attention tends to focus on elements consistent with that state of mind and memory works worse. And the same happens with the other emotions, each one acting in a different way in the cognitive processes and in the thoughts.

2. physiological response

Are the physical changes that occur in the body in variables such as muscle tension, pressure and blood pressure, heart rate, breathing, skin conductance, digestive system, etc. In the case of sadness, it is most likely that responses such as crying, increase or decreased appetite, low energy or vitality, fatigue, downcast eyes, facial or expression of dejection etc.

3. behavioral response

They are the behaviors, what we do (or do not do) and say when we feel an emotion. In the case of sadness, behaviors such as staying home doing nothing, canceling plans, doing things reluctantly, speaking in a dull tone of voice, etc. could appear.

concluding

As we can see, emotions have a language, a way of communicating with us and with others., that we must listen and understand if we want to improve our emotional intelligence and, ultimately, our well-being and our happiness, and that of the people with whom we interact.

To finish, we would like to highlight the idea that, although all people express emotions through this triple system, with responses very common and repeated, in reality each person is a world and develops their own forms of response, which are not better or worse, simply different. The important thing is to understand and listen in each case to the emotion behind and remember that there are no good or bad emotions, but rather pleasant and unpleasant, or adaptive and maladaptive.