4 psychologically healthy habits to overcome the fear of making decisions

It is said that knowledge creates ignorance: our ability to answer questions makes the respond to an unknown, many more arise in our mind, starting from all those new things that we know.

Something similar happens with our ability to make decisions, which is a double-edged sword. On the one hand, we are so good at working with several options or hypotheses and anticipating the consequences of choosing each one. them, but at the same time, this task has so many implications that sometimes it is intimidating and makes us feel emotional. overflow That is why some people aspire to not having to decide anything, which can degenerate into a real psychological problem. In this article we will see several habits that help to face and manage that fear of making decisions.

• Related article: "What is fear? Characteristics of this emotion"

What is the fear of making decisions?

For many years, a series of beliefs about human beings have spread that lead us to have a very biased view of ourselves. themselves and that do not start from a realistic or science-informed perspective, but rather from prejudices and discourses driven by motives ideological One of these myths about Homo sapiens, which places us in a position of superiority with respect to the rest of the animals, is that we are a species eminently rational, and that our minds have evolved to make decisions based on logic and the consideration of costs and benefits almost from the pure math.

This idea fits very well if what we want is to feel good about ourselves and be able to find an apparently rational explanation for everything we do. It is comforting and “comfortable”, and invites optimism. However, as almost always, the reality is much more complex than that. Both everyday life and history are full of examples of people who behave in a highly irrational way, generating much more discomfort than well-being, or even triggering situations in which it was clear from the start that none of those involved had anything to gain but a great deal to gain. to lose.

In this sense, it is worth asking the following question: if the human being is a purely rational animal, how is it explained that in certain circumstances we prefer to have few options to choose from than to have a few more? Why is it common for us to be grateful to have someone make decisions for us, even if these are relatively important? The fear of making decisions is also a sign that many psychological processes do not circulate on the rails of logic, but are influenced by very diverse aspects, some of which come from our side emotional.

In this case, what we observe is an avoidance pattern: the person feels anxiety and all kinds of feelings linked to anguish. when you find yourself in a situation where you need to make a decision, and you try your best to put off that task or delegate it to someone else person. It is a multicausal phenomenon., in which the following psychological phenomena may play a role:

• Fear of giving a bad image if the decision is not successful.
• Belief that one is not intelligent enough to decide taking into account all the relevant aspects to consider.
• Fear of feeling guilty right after making the decision.
• Anticipation of anxiety due to the fear of making decisions (vicious circle effect).

• You may be interested: "The 8 Higher Psychological Processes"

Habits to overcome the fear of making decisions

The most effective way to deal with this type of fear and insecurities is to go to a psychologist, but you can also apply these habits to your day-to-day (as long as they do not conflict with the instructions of the professional who attends to your case specific).

1. Set yourself fixed rules so as not to fall into avoidance

The easiest way to momentarily mitigate the fear of making decisions is to not make them or to pressure someone else to make them for us. That's why, to begin with, memorize these two rules: never delegate decisions in your personal (non-professional) life and never delay making a decision beyond a certain number of hours. It is important that you only set these two basic rules, so that you are very clear about what you should not do and you can build a new lifestyle on these behavior patterns.

• Related article: "How to generate new healthy habits?"

2. Embrace your imperfections and make them visible

In order not to be afraid of giving a bad image or feeling bad about your abilities and your criteria, it is essential that you let go of the pretense of being a perfect person. Accept that it is normal to make mistakes and make this part of you visible, telling others about occasions when those that you were wrong, recognizing your mistakes when you realize them... and above all, apologizing If you normalize the apology, it will be easier for you to accept it as a fundamental component of life, and to be reminded that most mistakes don't weigh heavily on you constantly.

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3. Keep an agenda

Time organization is important to overcome the fear of making decisions. If you stop associating the fact of having decisions on the “waiting list” (for a limited time) with discomfort, you are more likely to stop trying to avoid them. For that, keeping an agenda up to date can be a very good routine.

• Related article: "Time management: 13 tips to take advantage of the hours of the day"

4. Do a regular review of your successes

If you gain awareness about those decisions you made and that turned out to be a success, you will have a more nuanced and realistic view of these kinds of experiences and normalize them.

• You may be interested: "Personal SWOT Matrix: what it is, parts, and how to do it"

Are you looking for professional psychological assistance?

If you are looking for psychological assistance services or are interested in starting a therapy process, contact me.

My name is Thomas Saint Cecilia and I am specialized in the cognitive-behavioral intervention model, helping adults and adolescents, as well as companies. You can count on my services both in my consultation located in Madrid and through the online modality by video call.