How to overcome envy?
Envy is a feeling caused by failure or perception of personal inadequacy that is accompanied by sadness, frustration and anger. not having and wanting to have something that the other has. This may be causing depression, anxiety and aggressiveness coupled with feelings of injustice.
Envy is a natural process at a time of child development. Thus the feeling of envy can arise in childhood, when the child does not feel sufficiently loved by her parents and valued in relation to her siblings and friends. These feelings of lack and inferiority, coupled with feelings of rivalry, are essential.
The problem is that these people they want to have or be like others without fighting or looking for strategies to achieve it. They are people who have generally had many failures throughout their lives.
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Understanding the envy
Something essential is to accept ourselves as we are with virtues and defects, instead of being or appearing to others to mitigate envy
; envious people are people who feel a lot of contempt for themselves, and the seriously envious person also tends to despise others.When envy is exaggerated, abuse can occur to the partner and loved ones. Feelings of envy provoke feelings of guilt; they generally self-reprove and revert to the same person.
These people hide by making supposedly positive reviews and wanting to help, they also tend to disqualify the person they are envying. It is a very harmful feeling when it occurs in the family environment. When a member of the family wants to put down another member of the family, it is usually because he wants the other to be as he or she wishes.
There are factors in a society like ours that accentuate and even exalt the characteristics of envy, given that if it is not well seen but it is not recognized either; There are also other elements to help recognize it, such as: self-criticism, meditation and self-analysis that help recognize your values and dispel envy.
In addition, envy causes comfort with people. Thus, envy felt to an extreme degree can make the person who is feeling it sick.
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levels of envy
exist different levels of feelings of envy.
People who feel it slightly and manage to control that desire to possess or be what others have.
People who want the person to stop having what the other has at all costs.
People who appropriate the property of others that they envy, generally causing family and even social problems that can even end up in jail.
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What to do to overcome envy?
Envy is not always bad or not always a negative factor, because it isitself can help us grow if we know how to channel it.
Of course, the first thing that is required to handle envy is to recognize it and analyze the reasons why they have this feeling. It is very difficult to recognize the feeling of envy, It is usually in therapy that we recognize that behind depression are mishandled feelings of envy..
If a person imitates another, this is cause for alert, and we can explore whether they are positive or negative feelings that can help the envious person to overcome.
To recognize an envious person we can take into account some basic warning signs: envy problems arise above all in people who are not happy with our successes and show a lot of competitiveness and competition instead of sharing and enjoying what has been achieved.
One of the ways to handle this phenomenon is to focus on the personal growth instead of being attentive to what others are and have.
Sometimes envy can be an important engine to start growing, but it can still produce anxiety, anger and suffering.
A low self-esteemMisunderstood, insecurity and narcissism can lead to feelings of envy and instead we can try to be grateful for what we ourselves have achieved.
Enjoy life instead of seeing how others enjoy it It is a key factor for growth and avoiding feelings of envy. It is important to be flexible and not have a high level of self-demand and tolerance for frustration.
And on social media...
Facebook and Instagram help considerably to promote envy. We see how friends and even strangers are progressing, having fun even without anything published being true. They usually show how they dress, how they comb their hair, what they buy, what trips they take, fostering the fantasy that the other has a better time than oneself. We can all feel this feeling, and that is why marketing scholars achieve greater advertising impact by exploiting the potential of envy, and is also used in politics and in sales.
Idealization is very common in social networks and has to do with what we want from ourselves; but we believe that it is not possible to achieve it, and consequently we see it and desire it in the other. That's why it's useful try not to compare yourself to others and learn to value what you have working for you and not for others.
The way to handle envy in social networks is, first of all, to consider that much of what we see and read is utopian, and examine how what you are watching and reading affects us, and how it is affecting you in your self-esteem, and then start to stop following the people who are arousing emotions in you negative.
I suggest going to psychotherapy if you feel like this to help you recognize your feelings and also to raise your self-esteem, overcoming feelings of inferiority.