How to hit rock bottom and come out stronger

Have you ever felt like you're about to hit rock bottom? That nothing makes sense or that you're about to explode and can't take it anymore?

In this article I explain what it means to hit rock bottom emotionally and how to come out of it stronger.

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When we go through a bad time

Most of us have been through a time in our lives where we felt like we were falling, that it seemed we descend without being able to avoid it by a bottomless pit; In situations like this, we are terrified of reaching the end, hitting rock bottom and not knowing if we will be able to get out, if there will be a way out, or if we will have the strength left to try to overcome the situation.

These situations are accompanied by a lot of anguish, of a strong feeling that we have no control over anything and that we chain misfortunes and disappointments.

It is not uncommon for someone to come to a psychologist's office explaining these situations and asking for help to get out. Given this, it is not so important if what has led to descending have been your decisions or not knowing how to react to events in your life, and it is important to accept that you have hit rock bottom and

from there reflect on your current situation and look up.

As we fall, the fear, the prejudices, the emotional exhaustion are so strong that we do not see more choice but to try again and again to hold on to anything, and everything seems better than touching the background.

It happens that, in those situations, The best thing that can happen to you is precisely what causes the most fear. Bottom. Let me explain why.

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An apparent paradox

As you fall you are suffering from the situations you are experiencing because you do not know how you have been dragged down by them, for not finding solutions, or for the attempts that over and over again have been frustrating and have not helped you... But when you hit bottom and recognize yourself in it, you acquire a different perspective.

As you fall you feel the vertigo of seeing how you move away from the exit; from below you gain the peace of mind of understanding that you have already fallen, that you cannot fall any further and that you have the option of staying there or thinking about how to get out. Only when you really hit bottom can you go up.

They are two equally valid options. In fact, neither of the two guarantees that you will stop suffering or that these situations will not occur again, but only the second implies become aware of your real situation and the decision and commitment to get out of it and regain control of everything. It is then that we begin to realize everything that is in our power to rise again and not fall again, and that is where we focus.

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The problem, seen from therapy

When I am in session and a patient tells me this fall to the bottom, we recreate it, we experience that situation of helplessness and I invite him to stay in it for as long as necessary. These kinds of procedures help us accept ourselves, understand how we got there, and forgive ourselves for it.

It is then that the patient becomes aware that hitting rock bottom is not the worst thing that can happen, the worst thing is to do it and not understand what that situation means to us.

It is a stage of mourning in which, if we decide to go through it, we can emerge strengthened and with the strength and conviction necessary to begin the ascent.

No ascent is easy and sometimes you fall back a few meters but that happens is part of learning and every time you pick up the momentum you make it stronger and more confident of your possibilities.

It is very difficult to make significant and lasting changes without hitting rock bottom. we condemn ourselves to deceive ourselves thinking that it has already passed, that it has been a streak, that the "patch" has worked... And it is easier for us to accommodate ourselves and excuse ourselves than to take charge of the problems. And the problems end up dragging us.

Psychologists work on this symbology and accompany the fall. The "darkness" of knowing that you cannot go down any further allows you to put your feet on the ground and from there decide how and when you want to gain momentum and start going up. You feel the frustration, the rage, the anger and all the emotions that run over and invade you. We give you the space to feel them and let them flow, until they disappear and you feel free and determined to upload, without burdens or false evaluations or expectations.

How far you go will depend on you, your responsibility and your desire to transform and change things to be where you want to be.

We'll often stop on that climb, so you can look down and see how much you've climbed and how you've learned to hold on, to enjoy the recognition of the steps you have taken, to look up again and decide the next steps and how they take you to that peak, that end of the tunnel that is your goal.

You can overcome yourself and achieve it. Once you decide to go up, the most important change has already been made and it is up to you.

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In conclusion...

We all have the right to hit bottom and all bottoms have an end. When you go down, when you hit bottom, and when you go up I accompany you.

"Hitting rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life" (J.K. Rowling).