The law of detachment: what it is and how to live through it

The law of detachment proposes detachment from things, not living depending on something or someone in order to achieve happiness. In this sense, there are some practices that we can carry out during our daily lives to train detachment and apply it to our way of life.

In this article we will talk about the law of detachment, what is meant by this concept, how many laws it is divided into, what each one proposes and how to train this skill.

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What is detachment?

Nowadays it is usual to live immersed in a routine; we live within our comfort zone, since in this way we feel safer. But this comfort zone is a double-edged sword, since it can give us peace of mind but at the same time it does not allow us to move forward or carry out actions that are out of the ordinary. Security can harm our ability to progress and achieve greater goals, it can mean that we miss important opportunities.

Well, what the law of detachment proposes is to let go, free ourselves from the fear of change in order to move forward

. The concept of happiness is complex and it may be difficult for us to know what happiness means to us or what makes us happy. There are many factors that can affect our feeling of happiness, we can divide these mainly into material goods and mental goods.

With regard to material goods, it has been seen that if basic needs are met, which are those that allow us to survive, the subject can achieve happiness without the need to have many estate. Instead, it has been observed that what ends up giving us peace and tranquility is the proper mental state, that is, enjoying good mental health.

Detachment consists of ceasing to live worried about what we have or what we lack and detach from people, establish a healthier bond with them that allows us to live honestly being really us, showing us as we are, without fear of losing.

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The main laws of detachment

Now that we know better what detachment proposes, pointing out that we must let go of a lesser good to receive a greater good, from the universe, it will be easier for us to understand how many laws the universe is divided into. detachment.

1. be responsible for yourself

A very important factor in our day to day life is being responsible for our own actions and our own assets. We must take control of our lives and look for our development, we are the ones who have to direct our lives and act according to our purposes.

We live in a social environment, where relationships with other people are important and are beneficial to us, but in the end the one who will answer for our actions or choices is ourselves. For this reason, we must downplay opinions or the need to feel supported or approved and focus on doing what we really want and makes us happy. Since we will be the ones who fight for our goals, make sure that they follow what you really want and desire.

It is important that our happiness does not depend on other people, on how they act, but on making ourselves responsible for being happy, without the need for other people.

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2. Live the present, accept and assume reality

Another important factor to be happy is to live in the present, to live focused on the present moment. Our mind is constantly active, remembering or thinking about different issues, past, present and future. On many occasions, much of the time we spend remembering or worrying about facts, events, that have already taken place before, thus losing the experience of the present.

We were concerned about events that have already happened and that we can do little to modify and downplay current events on which we could act and control. Living focused on the past causes us to lose important things from the present, without being able to move forward or progress. The past holds us back without letting us achieve happiness or well-being.

So that, we must detach ourselves, let go of the past, being necessary to accept what happened and forgive or forgive ourselves for them; Only then can we turn the page and focus on what really matters, the present, living the "here and now" which is what will allow us to feel self-realized and be happy.

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3. Seeks to be free and allows others to be free too

To achieve well-being and be happy, it is also important to learn to be free and to be well being. Detaching ourselves does not mean living alone or without relating to others, but rather living freely in society. In order to be okay with another person, you first need to be okay with yourself. For this reason, we decide to be with someone because we want to and because it brings us positive things, because it adds us up, but not because we need it or we cannot be alone.

It is important differentiate between wanting to be with someone and needing to be with someone, the type of relationship that we will establish will be very different. We have to avoid the feeling of depending on someone, of needing to be accompanied, since as we said in the first law, we must be self-responsible and be the ones who guide our own lives.

Likewise, just as we must work on our freedom, it is important that we also free others and not act as guides or saviors of other subjects, we have to let them take responsibility for their own lives. We must destigmatize being alone; Not having a partner is not synonymous with loneliness, there are many other factors that influence our well-being and happiness. Moreover, being single is often the best option to be able to work on oneself, develop ourselves and feel self-fulfilled.

4. Assume that there will be losses

This statement “there are going to be losses” can shock or worry us, but we must be aware of them, since we live in a world where we are constantly subject to change. By losses we mean both material and figurative losses. That is, if we value the concept of time, we see how it constantly passes and we lose hours and years of our lives.

We should not value this idea as something negative or catastrophic, but as something normal It happens to everyone and we must learn to live with it. Everything we know or at least everything we can think about is finite, it has a beginning and an end and, therefore, we must be aware of this and assume that there will be losses.

Detachment facilitates this acceptance of losses, since, as we have mentioned, the laws related to this concept propose a greater focus on ourselves and live without the need to be linked to another person or depend on someone else. Likewise, the important thing will be to enjoy what we have at the present moment without worrying about what will happen, downplaying possible losses.

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How to live by the law of attachment

In this way, having presented the benefits that the practice of detachment can bring us, it is interesting consider the application of this law in our day to day in order to achieve a higher level of happiness or welfare. There are actions we can take in order to live with greater detachment.

1. Holistic or open view of what is happening

If we observe the different events of our life in a global way, without centering and focusing on specific aspects, it will be easier to adapt better to change or loss and to be able to practice detachment more easily.

2. Be the one who decides and take our own actions

We mention again the importance of living in society and interacting with other people, but always bearing in mind that we are the ones who have the final decision. We can listen to advice and value the different opinions that the subjects of our environment tell us, our close circle, but in the end we have to choose what we want to do, since whether we are wrong or right, we will be the only ones responsible. In this way, be you who directs your life and take responsibility for it.

3. Let go

We link this premise of letting go mainly with living in the present. We do not mean by this that we act impulsively, without thinking, but simply that we downplay past or future concerns and we focus on enjoying the positive, good events that are taking place in the present moment. Sometimes we lose opportunities or stop benefiting from present events by pretending to have everything thought out and planned, but it is impossible to control or predict 100% what will happen, for this reason be happy with what you have without continually anticipating.