Self-compassion: what it is, what benefits it brings, and how to enhance it

Because we are human beings, we have the privilege of going through many happy and very exciting situations, but also through sad situations; this turns out to be part of life. What is key is how we react to it.

Some people when they have these feelings of sadness for some ineptitude, incapacity or failure that may have have had or presented tend to give themselves a bad internal treatment, either because of their feelings or because of the behaviors that they may to have. Others, on the contrary, tend to be understanding with themselves in this situation, avoiding treat each other and, on the contrary, they tend to cheer up or understand each other in order to overcome the situation. In this sense, throughout this article we will tell you what is self-compassion and how to promote it.

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What is self-compassion?

We are clear that compassion is the feeling of sadness or discomfort that a person can produce when seeing that a third party is suffering or suffering; this drives the first person to alleviate, remedy or avoid this pain that the other suffers. So, therefore, we would understand that self-compassion has to do with the process by which the person achieves

feel sorry for herself in an unfavorable case she has had; these contexts may include failure, insufficiency, or general suffering.

In other words, self-compassion is the compassion directed towards oneself that a person can have, it implies being understanding and warm with oneself** reducing levels of self-criticism** when the person has failed or has felt incompetent.

Self-compassionate people are aware of their personal well-being, are empathetic and sensitive to the discomfort of others, being able to be tolerant with the discomfort without being self-critical, understanding the origins of the discomfort and giving each other a warm deal.

Beginnings of self-compassion in contemporary psychology

Self-compassion has its beginnings or principles in Buddhist psychology, as it has been studied and practiced for more than 2600 years. Recently, contemporary psychology has shown an interest in including it in the research and clinical field.

One of the first inclusions of self-compassion in the West occurred in Sharon Salzberg's work in 1995, she who emphasizes it as one of the central elements in mindfulness. Kristin Neff is one of the leading researchers on self-compassion.

In the West, this theme has been developed considering the elements of different Buddhist teachers who have incorporated its practice in the West.

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Components of self-compassion

For Kristin Neff, self-compassion has 3 components which are interrelated and they can be trained to deal with unfavorable situations such as pain situations emotional.

1. Kindness with oneself (self-kindness)

This first component has to do with the person treat yourself with care and compression.

2. Common humanity

The process of acknowledging shared humanity has to do with the recognition that others go through sufferings that are similar to their own, that our problems are not punishments that have been imposed solely on us, and that just as we would help someone else, we deserve to be helped, and vice versa.

3. Mindfulness

The process of mindfulness has to do with the ability to be aware of paying attention and acceptance of what is happening in the present.

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How could we foster self-compassion?

Now that we know the key concepts of self-compassion, let's see how we could encourage it and put it into practice with ourselves to improve our physical and mental health.

1. spend time with yourself

It is important to dedicate a prudent time where we can find ourselves, in this way we can concentrate on what we are feeling or thinking. To be able to carry it out it is necessary to put aside all those technological devices that distract us with a constant bombardment of stimuli, which will not allow us to concentrate on this activity; Similarly, it is necessary to find a suitable space where it is easier for us to have this activity.

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2. be objective

Reforming our way of seeing things will allow us to have a new point of view on a problem or situation. We all make mistakes throughout our existence, so you don't have to be so hard on yourself. Promote objectivity in your way of thinking and seeing things, accompany yourself by feeding on the opinions and points of view of others to compare our ways of seeing thingsJust like you would for a friend or family member or loved one when they're having a bad day or when things aren't going their way.

3. Leave the drama

It is essential to put aside the dramas that we can do when going through an unfavorable situation; we must remember that self-compassion has to do with accepting what has happened and the emotions we have at that time, without falling into interpretations of "black or white" based on the binary bias.

4. Responsibility put into practice

At the moment of learning our mistakes and assuming the commitment to take responsibility for them, our resilience capacity is increased in the face of unfavorable situations that may occur again. It is important to remember that self-compassion also becomes part of the improvement and self-improvement processes, so self-responsibility turns out to be the key.

5. Think hopefully and positively

Thinking favorably and with hope turns out to be vital to continue living in good spirits. Similarly, it turns out to be important to foster self-compassion in ourselves.

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6. Connect with nature

It is highly recommended and even therapeutic to spend time with ourselves and nature itself, leaving aside everything that can distract us from being able to carry out this activity; natural environments they allow us to stop being exposed to reminders of everything that worries us and it makes us feel bad because we link it to our obligations, the actions we take and they make us feel guilty, etc.

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The main benefits of self-compassion

Having reached this subsection, it is necessary to ask ourselves the following questions: What would be the benefits that we could have if we are self-compassionate with ourselves? What would this skill be used for in the development of our emotional intelligence? We will go on to answer these questions by explaining the benefits that the practice of self-compassion could bring.

Here are the top 5 benefits of self-compassion.

1. Promotion and reinforcement of intrapersonal and interpersonal relationships

Through the practice of self-compassion we can foster and strengthen our intrapersonal and interpersonal relationships. A person or individual exhibiting self-pity for oneself possibly will have a higher level of self-compassion for another person and for himself.

2. Fostering patience and tolerance

Self-compassion gives us adequate levels of patience and tolerance with ourselves. We live in an era where society sometimes demands excessive competence and rapid development of diverse knowledge and skills, this sometimes it makes us lose our cool. However, it is necessary to remember that all people are not the same and that we can advance at our own pace.

3. Inner joy in times of difficulty

A person can change the way of a reality that is presented to him through his attitude. Self-compassion can help us think more favorably in an unfavorable situation. Well, despite the fact that something negative can happen to us, we must prioritize the various opportunities that we can have to try one activity or another again, or give our attention to the good things we have in life, among other things plus.

4. Introspective process:

Self-compassion also allows us strengthen and improve the level of self-knowledge that we possess. What will help us to be more thoughtful with ourselves and others.

Psychological intervention applied to self-compassion

Self-compassion has shown over time to be linked to our psychological health. Various therapeutic interventions have been implemented that seek to increase or increase self-compassion. Mainly, these programs were implemented in patients with a high tendency to self-criticism and also in people who do not necessarily present a clinical picture. Next, we will explain two therapeutic training programs to improve self-compassion.

compassion-focused therapy

Compassion Focused Therapy is a favorable psychotherapeutic process for the treatment of high levels of self-criticism and shame, qualities that are at the base of various psychological difficulties.

Mindfulness and Self-Compassion Program

The Mindfulness and Self-compassion program turns out to be a psychotherapeutic process consisting of 8 weeks of treatment, presents a clarified design to cultivate Mindfulness and self-compassion skills applied to daily life. This will allow us to properly manage difficult emotions, which will provide greater psychological well-being.