Why do I like to be angry?

Although most of us are aware that being content and happy has a positive impact on our physical and mental health, anger and all the feelings associated with this experience is something natural in being human. Not in vain, this is a universal emotion, present in human beings of all cultures and societies.

Now, some people seem to live constantly angry, with themselves or with the rest of the world, and that is where the problems begin.

This phenomenon can have multiple causes and is generally related to the tendency to link a short-term incentive system to behaviors that feed the emotion of anger. The result is that it gives us the feeling that we "like" being angry, although this is actually a mirage: what we really do is channel a series of frustrations and inconveniences before life causing anger to eclipse all those thoughts that make us feel vulnerable.

How does this happen? Here we will look at the most common causes and triggers that are often behind this experience.

• Related article: "The 8 types of emotions (classification and description)"

‘I like to always be angry’: possible causes

This form of discomfort is a complex and multi-causal phenomenon; by its very nature, it cannot be caused by a single cause, but by a combination of several factors.

Taking this into account, here we will review the causes that, by overlapping each other, may be behind the constant anger in a person. Take them as the components of a thought circuit that leads you to have a predisposition to be angry by default.

1. excessive perfectionism

The excessive perfectionism that some people have in their daily lives usually causes states of intense frustration when things do not turn out as they intended or expected. which in turn generates a state of permanent vulnerability and hypersensitivity that makes the person overreact to any setback.

This permanent frustration, in the long run, can also translate into anger with other people and facilitate a permanent state of discomfort, tension and anger as a general rule when dealing with any person.

On top of that, this perfectionism also it may be due to the perception that many people may have of not having the life they believe they deserve, that is, to an interference between what they thought their life would be and how it really is.

• You may be interested: "Dysfunctional perfectionism: causes, symptoms and treatment"

2. food deficits

Poor diet, hunger felt on repeated occasions and food deficits in general often cause irritability and discomfort in the affected person and this translates to all areas of their life, both personally and in interpersonal and social relationships.

This tendency to be angry and irritable usually happens when we follow a strict diet or if we eat poorly, with ultra-processed foods or with those that do not provide the nutrients we need daily.

• Related article: "Psychology and Nutrition: the importance of emotional eating"

3. Lack of sleep

As happens with food, lack of sleep can often generate altered states in which the person reacts more irritably to any stimulus in their environment and in any conversation they have with others people.

In order to be more calm, rested and happy, we must try to sleep daily the necessary hours so that our body and brain rest enough and regain energy for tomorrow.

• You may be interested: "Insomnia: what is it and how it impacts our health"

4. Drug's use

Scientific research over several years has shown that widespread drug use can lead to a series of behavioral and emotional changes in the person, as well as a negative influence on their organism.

The repeated consumption of some drugs can generate irritability in the consumer, as well as permanent bad mood, tendency to conflict and even aggressiveness in the most serious cases.

• Related article: "Types of drugs: know their characteristics and effects"

5. unwanted loneliness

Unwanted loneliness is also the cause of great discomfort in the person who suffers it, especially if this loneliness is interpreted as something unfair, that the rest of the person does not suffer.

Medical science has shown that generalized loneliness can cause an increase in irritability in the person, as well as a bad mood, habitual anger and a tendency to generate interpersonal conflicts.

6. Family or couple conflicts

Family or couple conflicts and in general the difficulties to relate to each other cause many people a state of permanent anger both with themselves and with the rest of the people around them. surround.

To overcome our states of intense anger, it is recommended train our social skills and our ability to interact and relate to the people around us, both with friends, with families or with our partners.

7. Excess work stress

Excessive work stress and some alterations associated with excessive work, such as burnt out syndrome they can also be causes that explain why a person is angry all day.

Again, lack of rest and excessive work pace can destabilize a person's mental health and cause it to lean towards highly maladaptive social relationship modalities based on permanent conflict and anger.

• You may be interested: "Work stress: causes, and how to combat it"

8. lack of emotional intelligence

Emotional intelligence is the set of skills, tools and strategies that once applied allow us to recognize their own feelings and also those of others, as well as function successfully in interaction contexts Social.

emotional intelligence it is also one of the most necessary social skills to relate correctly to our environment, and a deficit of it can cause some people to always present conflicts with other people or to be angry continually.

9. Lack of social skills

As indicated, social skills are very necessary to maintain a full social life and satisfactory, as well as to communicate correctly with the people around us.

These types of social skills are acquired during childhood and adolescence, and are of great help to interact normally with other human beings. Likewise, a lack or deficit of these skills can also be the cause of permanent anger on the part of some people.

Some of the most necessary social skills are: assertiveness, active listening, persuasiveness, non-verbal language control and the ability to set goals.

To do?

Given the fact of being angry almost without interruption and even without being able to identify a specific cause that explains it, The most effective and recommended solution is to go to psychotherapy. With the help of a psychology professional, you will have a fully personalized emotional management training program adapted to your needs.

Are you looking for psychotherapeutic assistance services?

If you want to have professional psychological support, get in touch with us.

In Azor & Associates We work helping people of all ages, couples and families both in person and through online video call sessions.