9 Ways Machismo Makes Us Psychopaths

When we think of the concept of “machismo”, it is easy for us to imagine a man who expresses opinions clearly sexist about the role that women should have as caretakers of the home and children.

However, it has long been known that machismo is not just a series of beliefs about how relations between men and women should be. It does not appear only by directly displaying unpopular opinions; It arises in our way of behaving and relating. It is in the deeds, not in the words.

That is why, many times, the hurtful nature of machismo is concealed; It is seen as totally normal, not because it does not cause pain (it does) nor because it is fair (it is not), but because it is hard for us to imagine another way of relating to the female gender. It has become normal not to empathize with women, act in front of them as a psychopath would.

• Related article: "Micromachismos: 4 subtle signs of everyday machismo"

This is how machismo makes us psychopaths in front of women

Next we will see several attitudes, practices and behaviors that,

Despite being a way of treating women as an object, they are part of our day to day.

1. Expect a reward for treating a woman like a human being

Psychopaths are characterized by being able to manage any personal relationship following a logic of costs and benefits. That is, practically everything you do when you are with someone makes sense as part of a more or less concrete strategy to get something in return.

This is something that happens a lot these days in the way that men try to get along with women. The fact of not explicitly belittling is perceived as a competitive window that you have in front of a large number of men, and that means that it can be used to ask for something in return.

For example, the concept of "frienzone" is often is used to emotionally blackmail in this sense, ignoring that friendship is not something that should be used to buy people.

• Related article: "Emotional blackmail: a powerful form of manipulation in the couple"

2. Forcing situations where it costs too much to say no

Although it is slow, progress exists, and for this reason more and more people are clear that the rape is something aberrational in all cases (although it is hard to believe, this idea is relatively recent). However, actions that look very similar to this kind of will imposition directed against women continue to be normalized.

An example of this has to do with "flirting" techniques commonly used by men and that have in common to create such a violent situation in which to say it doesn't cost much. This can consist both of blurring the limits of personal space (with hugs that were originally going to be brief but end lengthening) as in generating such an unpleasant environment that accepting any request is the easiest way out (for example, through very personal questions and uncomfortable).

The idea is placing women in a clearly inferior positionleaving her with no room to negotiate what is acceptable and what is not.

• Related article: "Psychopathy: what happens in the mind of the psychopath?"

3. Pretend they don't hear or don't understand

This practice is another one of those subtle ways that are used to annul the woman, and consists of acting as if everything that happens in the dialogues with them happens in a theater, something that means nothing and what we can set aside to address people who do have enough intelligence to understand what is happening.

4. Acting like every woman should give up her time to meet a man

It is systematic: no one is surprised if, going down the street, we do not want to stop for a second to receive an advertising brochure from a new business that she has opened in the area, but it is unacceptable that a woman does not want to pay attention for several minutes to give the opportunity to a man who wants to introduce himself. In the same way that psychopaths can approach any relationship as a puzzle in which the goal it is to obtain what one wants, in this kind of interactions the initial disposition of the woman does not matter; The only thing that matters is the end you want to reach.

5. Blaming the woman for her feelings

The emotional sphere has always been associated with the feminine, and that means that it can be interpreted as a sign of weakness. For example, female workers are often belittled by the assumption that they care more about people than cold business goals. This happens even with bosses.

6. Using your sexuality against you

Much of the way in which we have learned to conceive of female sexuality is based on a belief that is as irrational as it is harmful: if you are not a man and want to live your sexuality, you lose rights and dignity.

That is, the simple knowledge that a woman is not totally oblivious to sexual life can be used against her, either to humiliate her or to curtail her freedom under the pretext of protecting her. Any excuse is good to subdue a person who is not assigned to the masculine gender.

• You may be interested in: "Psychology of sexism: 5 macho ideas that occur today"

7. Using her "purity" against her

If the previous option cannot be exploited because there are no obvious signs that a woman does not fit the role of sexual object, that can also be a reason to attack her.

As? There are different strategies: from treating it as something that has no value since it is "disconnected" from its supposed function as a machine to reproduce and breed, to pointing out that not investing time and effort in arousing the interest of men detracts from its value.

8. Valuing women only for their aesthetics

This goes far beyond that tendency we have to look at the appearance of people to decide what attitude we will take in front of them, something that we often fall into regardless of how the other. In the case of women, in addition, machismo contributes to the fact that it is the physique that describes his personality, her aspirations and interests.

In other words, the woman is perceived as an animated mannequin, programmed specifically for guide your thinking towards the field in which the mannequin works: attract, offer a good image, etc

9. Blame the victim of gender violence

It is still very common hold victims of sexual harassment or rape accountable for what has happened to them. The reason for this is that doing anything else would mean taking full responsibility for a serious problem. social and structural, while ignoring it and keeping women's security needs out of the picture is more comfortable.