10 unbreakable principles of good communication with the environment

Communication is essential in any area of ​​human life, but that does not mean that, simply because of being part of the species human being, we have an innate talent to make all communicative exchanges fluid and free from misunderstandings, problems to express ourselves etc

Whether in the personal or professional sphere, people must do our part to understand and make ourselves understood; it is a deliberate effort that must go hand in hand with a learning process. Therefore, in this article we will give a review of the unbreakable principles that characterize good communication with others, and that are part of psychology applied to training in social skills, very useful in contexts such as couples therapy, family therapy or even psychotherapy for problems such as excessive shyness or lack of assertiveness.

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The basic principles of effective communication with the environment

Effective communication is known as a set of strategies that allow us to convey a particular message in a concise, clear manner. and understandable for the receiver, avoiding as much as possible misunderstandings, communication blockages and the inefficient use of resources and information. time.

Elements such as the code (rules and signs issued by the sender that must be known by the receiver), the channel (medium through which the message is transmitted), the referent (what the sender's message refers to) and the context (situation in which the message occurs). communication).

Effective communication can be achieved by putting into practice some strategies, knowledge and skills that are key in any communicative act. These abilities develop, in part, normally during growth and psychological development throughout life. life, but it is also possible to continue progressing in these types of skills by applying deliberate learning strategies. For example, going to the psychologist. Therefore, here we will focus on that facet of communication skills that can be expanded and reinforced through through a process of personal development, analysis of their own behaviors and learning from their own mistakes.

1. Clear and concise message

To begin with, we must always keep in mind that the message we send to one or more people must always be clear and concise so that anyone can understand it. without being confused by terms and concepts that do not add relevant information to what we say and only serve to distract or divide attention.

Clarity means that we must use intelligible language, and conciseness is about getting to the point whenever we can and saying what we want without letting time pass without further ado. This, as we will see, does not mean that we should avoid silences at all costs, as long as we use them for a specific purpose.

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2. Look at the eyes

Looking into the eyes of our interlocutor is one of the basic social skills that must be practiced in any interaction or communicative act with one or more people.

Eye contact denotes security in what one says and trust with the other person; that is why it is so important to maintain it during the interaction. The best thing, however, is not to get obsessed with the percentages and just really limit the time that we are not maintaining eye contact.

Normally, it is considered that this contact must be constant for 80% of the time, so that what we want to express is understood correctly. On the contrary, speaking without looking at the other person can be considered a sign of a lack of self-confidence, or even a lack of honesty.

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3. Use non-verbal language

Body language is the set of physical gestures, movements or postures of our body that are part of the interpretation of the information emitted. We must bear in mind that even If we put aside this aspect of our way of communicating, our interlocutor will not.. Therefore, it is better for us to take charge of this and modulate, as far as possible, the way in which we express things through non-verbal language.

Correct body language will allow us to refine our message at all times and add information to what we say whenever necessary. The most important aspects are the gesticulation with the hands, the position of the arms in relation to their proximity to the trunk, the direction of our chest in relation to the location of our interlocutor, facial gestures, and the degree of inclination of the head and trunk.

Natural gestures and a relaxed posture are a sign that we are establishing a positive relationship with our interlocutor or interlocutors. On the other hand, the fact of maintaining a certain muscular rigidity and the arms placed in front of the trunk expresses that we are in a defensive attitude.

4. Use the proper registry

Just as we take care of body language, we must also pay attention at all times to what we say, that is, verbal language. In this sense, the registry we use is key.

This means that we must use language adapted to our audience at all times.; that is, if we are with a group of friends we will speak in a more familiar way than if we are before a more informal or academic audience.

In the same way, if we are in an audience specialized in a particular topic, we can use more technical words, as long as we are sure that the message will be understood.

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5. be empathetic

Empathy is not simply a moral quality; it is also a resource that allows us to communicate better. Not losing sight of what other people's belief system is, what their values ​​and interests are, and how they might feel about it depending on the way in which we express ourselves, it is very important to adapt our speech trying to maintain a framework of cordiality and mutual recognition.

When in a communicative situation all the interlocutors are empathic with the others, communication will always be more fluid and it is more likely that understandings or common ground will be reached with greater ease.

6. Adapt the message to the context

Taking the context into account is one of the elementary principles that we must take into account in any communicative intention, since this It will help us to know at all times what type of message to transmit and how to do it.

Context is the physical place in which we communicate with someone, the type of audience we are speaking to, the number of people who receive the message, their age, employment or socioeconomic position and the type of event we are in at that moment.

Knowing the context in which we are, we will know what things to say and what to avoid, since it is not the same to speak in front of the audience of a university, in front of a group of friends, talking with the family, with the partner or conveying the message in a job interview. job.

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7. Active listening

Active listening is another essential social skill that we must put into practice if we want our communication to be effective and it can be learned and trained with dedication and effort.

In any communication, especially the one in which two people speak, we must listen carefully to our interlocutor, and not only that, but also we must show that attention: affirming with the head, showing our emotional reactions according to what we love listening to, looking into the eyes, etc. This will contribute to making face-to-face dialogue a more enriching experience for both parties, and it will prevent you from ending sooner than necessary due to the frustration of not feeling heard.

8. Respect the turn of speech

Respecting the turn to speak is one of the essential rules in any communication between people and a sign of education and good manners that should not be overlooked.

Respecting the turns in which each participant speaks helps us to better organize communication and allows each interlocutor to hear everything the other person has to say no interference.

9. Take advantage of the silences

Silence is not always wasted time; It can be an element to encourage reflection, to emphasize certain words or phrases, and to give a certain leisurely cadence to the dialogue when this is required. Having an irrational fear of those moments of silence will cause us to speak faster than we think, leading to misunderstandings.

10. paraphrase and ask

Paraphrasing consists of re-presenting in a summarized and orderly manner the main concepts of the message that has been delivered to a person or group of people. It is a useful resource to avoid misunderstandings and establish a collaborative framework when communicating.

Both the paraphrase and the questions addressed to the audience about what we have exposed serve to consolidate the exposed concepts and works as a summary of the most important thing that we have saying.

Are you looking for psychological support in couples therapy or development of communication skills?

If you are interested in having professional psychological support, contact me.

My name is Pol Osés and I specialize in caring for young people and couple relationships.