10 practical ways to build resilience

"What does not kill me makes me stronger".

—Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 - 1900) - The decline of idols.

How do we deal with difficult events and adverse circumstances that change our lives? The death of a loved one, the loss of a job, a serious illness, a terrorist attack, a natural disaster or other traumatic events: These are all examples of difficult experiences that anyone can have at some point. Most people react to these situations with strong emotions and uncertainty, although they are generally able to adapt to these stressful conditions. What allows them to do it?

The resilience is the capacity that is involved in this process, an ongoing process that requires time and effort and enables people to cope with these challenging situations Step by Step.

It may interest you: "The 10 typical habits of resilient people"

Below you can find ideas to understand the concept of resilience and some indications on how to develop it and improve it.

What is resilience?

The resilience is the process by which we make a correct adaptation in the face of adversity, traumatic events

, tragedies, various threats or significant sources of stress, such as family or personal relationship problems, serious health problems or financial and work stressors. It means recovering or resetting after a difficult experience.

Studies carried out show that resilience is something common; it is not an extraordinary ability. People normally demonstrate resilience throughout their lives; Examples of this are people seeking employment again after being laid off by their former employers, families returning to rebuild their homes after a fire, or the relatives of the victims of a terrorist attack, who make the effort to carry on with their lives despite the loss of a loved one darling.

The ability to overcome a losing situation

It could be said that resilience is the strength beyond resistance. It is the ability to overcome an adverse stimulus. The resilience involves maintaining flexibility and balance in life as you face difficult circumstances and traumatic events.

Being resilient does not mean that the person does not experience difficulties or psychological stress. Emotional pain and sadness are common emotions among people who have suffered great adversity or traumatic moments in their lives. In fact, the road to resilience is not easy, and it is probably full of obstacles and unstable situations that can affect our emotional state.

It is important to know that resilience is not a trait that people either have or do not have, but is a concept that includes a series of behaviors, thoughts and actions that They can be learned and progressively developed by anyone who wants to.. Being resilient is not an extraordinary being: this capacity is in every person. The task is to develop this capacity with attitude and firmness.

10 Ways to Build Resilience

Building capacity to create resilience is a personal project. Not all people react in the same way to traumatic or stressful situations. An approach to improving resilience may work for one person but not for another, so different strategies can be used to promote good coping.

Some of these variations often reflect cultural differences. Culture can have an impact on how a person communicates their feelings and how they deal with adversity. An example of this are the different conceptions of death that exist in various cultures; while for most western countries death is represented as the end of all good things, it is seen as an extremely negative event and is usually a taboo subject, For the Orientals, it constitutes the step towards regeneration and the reaffirmation of ancestral values. who made up their community.

The key is to identify which tips can work for us and how they can be part of our own personal strategy to improve it. Below you can find Ten Strategies That Will Help You Build Resilience On Your Own.

1. Establishes supportive relationships within and outside the family

It is important build good relationships with close family members, friends, and other important people in our lives. Accepting help and support from people who love and listen helps provide role models and offers encouragement and reassurance. Some people find that being active in community groups, community-based organizations, helps disadvantaged people, and other local groups can provide them with social support and help them to have hope.

2. Avoid seeing crises as insurmountable obstacles

Stress-producing events cannot be prevented from occurring, but you can change the way you interpret and react to them. Try to look beyond the present and think that things will improve in the future. See if there are any subtle ways to feel better while dealing with difficult situations.

3. Accept that change is part of life

It is possible that as a result of an adverse situation you will not be able to achieve certain goals. accept the circumstances that cannot be changed can help you focus on the circumstances that can be improved.

4. Head towards your goals

Develop your ability to make realistic plans and follow the steps necessary to carry them out. Always act to get closer to your goals, even if they seem like small achievements. Instead of focusing on tasks that can't seem to be accomplished, ask yourself about the things you can improve today and that will help you walk in the direction you want to go.

5. Take decisive action

In adverse situations, taking decisive action is better than ignoring problems and tensions and wish they would go away. Don't be afraid to reflect on the situation in front of you, and the moment you think you've reached a conclusion, move forward.

6. Look for opportunities to discover yourself

Many times, as a result of a fight against adversity, people can learn something about themselves and feel that they have grown in some way on a personal level. Many people who have experienced tragedies and difficult situations have expressed improvement in coping with their personal relationships, an increase in personal strength even when they feel vulnerable, the feeling that his self-esteem has improved, a more developed spirituality and a greater appreciation of life.

7. Improve your communication and problem solving skills

The more we develop these capacities, the better we will know how to resolve our interpersonal conflicts and the less stressful burden will fall on our person. It is also important to know how to handle strong feelings and impulses, to allow yourself to experience them, and also to recognize when you need to avoid them in order to continue functioning.

8. Cultivate a positive view of yourself

Nobody is perfect, each of us has strengths and areas for improvement. It is important accept and love us just as we are, rely on our strengths and abilities and try to improve our capabilities as far as possible.

9. Never lose hope

When we are optimistic despite the problems we will be better able to expect good things to happen in life. Try to visualize what you want to achieve instead of worrying excessively about what you fear will happen or what could have been and was not. Even when you are faced with very painful events that cause you great discomfort, try to consider the situation that is causing you stress in a broader context, and keep a long-term perspective.

10. Take care of yourself

You need to pay attention to the immaterial and to yourself: for example, you should think about your needs and desires. Take an interest in activities that you enjoy and find relaxing. exercise regularlyIt is beneficial for both your physical and psychological health. Healthy mens in healthy body. Take care of oneself helps keep mind and body in good shape and ready to face situations that require resilience.

Other ways to promote your inner strength

Some additional ways to build resilience could be of great help to you. For example, I suggest you try writing about your deepest thoughts, emotions and feelings related to the traumatic experience. or other stressful events in your life that currently cause you discomfort and discomfort.

The meditation and some spiritual practices such as yoga or the mindfulness They can also help some people to establish positive relationships, improve their quality of life, and focus on the future with a better perspective.

Some questions to ask yourself

Focusing on positive past experiences, developing positive moods, and enhancing sources of personal strength are factors that can decisively help you identify personal qualities and learn strategies that work for you when it comes to building resilience.

Questions for self-exploration

With this little self-exploration exercise answering the following questions about yourself and your reactions to the challenges in your life you will be able to discover how to respond effectively to events difficult.

• What types of events have been most difficult for you?
• How have these events affected you psychologically?
• When you find yourself stressed or hopeless, has it helped you to think about your loved ones?
• When you are faced with a troublesome and difficult experience, who have you turned to for help?
• What have you been able to learn about yourself and your relationship with others when you have gone through difficult circumstances?
• Has it helped you to provide emotional support to other people who are going through a similar situation?
• Have you been able to overcome the obstacles that have been appearing in your life? And if so, how did you achieve it?
• What is the main engine that you consider has helped you the most to move forward?

I hope this article has been helpful to you to get to know yourself better and discover your capacity for resilience, and develop it throughout your life.