Interview with Jesús Matos, author of 'A course in emotions'

The management of emotions brings together a whole series of psychological processes that enhance mental health in very varied situations of our lives. The problem is that, at the same time, if we are not in the habit of applying habits that reinforce good emotional management to our day-to-day life, we become prone to suffering many types of discomfort.

To understand more about this facet of emotional balance, on this occasion We interviewed Jesús Matos Larrinaga, a Madrid-based psychologist who has recently published the book A course of emotions.

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"A course in emotions": learning to live with our emotional side

Jesús Matos Larrinaga is a psychologist specializing in psychotherapy, Director of the center In Mental Balanceand author of the books good morning joy and A course of emotions, published in this month of April through Ediciones Urano. Currently, this mental health expert has an important presence in the media and has participated in several TED talks. In this interview he tells us about his latest book, full of useful information and guidelines for learning to manage our emotions.

How did you come up with the main idea that is at the root of "A Course in Emotions"?

It was a process that began about 3 years ago, in which, as a result of new research in psychology, I began to incorporate new techniques into the interventions that I had been doing with my patients. I discovered that the potential that these tools had was tremendous and I began to visualize the possibility of writing a manual in which the entire process of managing emotions.

I wanted to contribute my grain of sand to those people who had never considered going to a psychologist but who needed a push when learning to manage emotions. So I tried to write a work that would be easy to read and to implement in our daily lives.

To whom would you recommend this book especially?

The good thing about this book is that anyone can learn from it and develop new tools to deal with everyday emotional difficulties.

Unfortunately, we are a society, which, in general levels, has little knowledge about the effective management of emotions. The consequence of this is the very high levels of mental disorders and consumption of psychotropic drugs that we have in our country.

I would recommend reading it to all those who would like to develop new strategies to get to know themselves a little better and to face life's challenges.

In the end, the book is a manual to increase our emotional intelligence, and what studies tell us is that people with high emotional intelligence tend to have high levels of mental health and physical health, relationships more satisfying social relationships, jobs with which you feel more identified and higher levels of psychological well-being, which is ultimately what all we wish.

The book includes a series of practical exercises so as not to be left alone in theory. Can anyone apply them to their day to day, even if they have no previous experience in the use of emotional management guidelines?

The good thing about the book is that the information is designed to go step by step, whether we already have certain baggage in this to manage emotions as if it is the first time that we approach a book of this guy.

In addition, quite new techniques and tools are included in it, which will probably surprise more than one who already has some experience and knowledge about emotions.

What criteria have you used to choose the emotional management techniques that you talk about in "A Course on Emotions"?

The first criterion has been scientific, that is, to only include techniques that have proven to be highly effective in controlled studies. I wanted to make sure that the end result really worked and was not another book that just says what the reader wants to read.

A second criterion has been my personal experience and as a psychologist with respect to these tools. I have wanted to condense everything I have learned in these 10 years of practice in which I have had the opportunity to serve more than 2,000 people.

Something that I always do, before starting to use a technique in consultation, apart from having trained myself and having verified that It has plenty of scientific efficacy, it is to try it with myself, to be able to experience what the people who come to me are going to feel. So in the end, the techniques included in the book are the result of many screening processes.

One of the most important ideas that you explain in the book is that many psychological problems are reinforced by our attempts to "block" negative emotions. Do you think this is a mistake that people often fall into?

I think it is the main mistake we make when it comes to managing ourselves. It is logical that this is the case, since what common sense tells us is that we have to move away from what makes us feel bad and get closer to what makes us feel good. There is the catch, on many occasions, we try to escape from our emotions looking for short-term satisfaction, but without wanting to, this puts us in a spiral of suffering.

What scientific studies tell us is that the emotional coping style of avoidance, that is, trying not to feel, is highly related to high levels of depression and anxiety. The way to manage our emotions goes through their acceptance, never through attempts to avoid them.

In this sense, I have found that many books that address the same subject recommend techniques that promote emotional avoidance, so it may be that this perspective surprises the reader.

In what aspects of day-to-day do you first begin to notice that our emotional management has improved, once we start working on the habits that lead to it?

What people who begin to manage emotions effectively often experience is that they are much more present in their life, they pay much more attention to what they are doing, instead of being so entangled in their thoughts. Also, when we have learned not to run away from our emotions, we begin to have a totally different relationship. With them, we begin to integrate all the information they give us and much more complex thoughts begin to emerge. adaptive.

The good thing about this process is that it never ends, when we change the relationship we have with our emotions and with our thoughts, we begin to relate to others in a different way. life, and this is very powerful, since emotions are present in all vital areas, which can allow us to begin to face changes that may have taken us years avoiding.