This is how Childhood Wounds affect us in our adult relationships

We well know that interpersonal relationships are a fundamental part of human life. Through them, people establish emotional and social connections with others, which allows us to share experiences and build meaningful bonds that make us feel loved, safe, and that satisfy the biological need that we all have to feel part of a community.

However, our relationships can also become a source of pain and conflict, especially when emotional wounds from childhood are reflected in the way we interact with others.

• Related article: "The stages of childhood (physical and mental development)"

Characteristics of childhood emotional wounds

In psychology, the emotional wounds of childhood are wounds that many of us adults have in our psyche associated with an emotion, such as an affective injury and that is in us unconsciously until we take the time to think and reflect on those behaviors that they limit our relationships and we associate them with those childhood experiences, and we realize that they are behaviors that come from that wound.

These injuries were possibly caused by various circumstances, such as emotional or physical abuse, verbal and/or psychological abuse, abandonment, negligence, rejection, love conditioned on achievements, overprotective parents or the loss of a loved one, as well as the depression of one of the parents, inadequate upbringing, the birth of a little brother and the jealousy associated with it, among others possible.

It is also possible that it is a wound created from a situation interpreted as negative by the child, since his emotional immaturity has not allowed him to correctly understand and interpret what happened in the context of that moment.

It is normal for adults to have one or more of them to a lesser or greater depth, the wounds There are 5 emotional wounds: rejection wound, abandonment wound, betrayal wound, injustice wound, humiliation.

We associate injuries mainly with father figures, but they may have been caused by other figures as well such as teachers, other family members or even bullying by friends. These experiences can leave deep emotional scars that can last a lifetime, and can affect the way you that people relate to others, through our way of communicating and behavior within the community relationship.

The observable behaviors that show psychological wounds are, among others, distrust, insecurity, fear, jealousy, guilt, self-abandonment, sleep problems, obsessive thoughts, anxiety, depression, emotional reactions overflowed.

For example, a person who has been the victim of emotional abuse may have difficulty trusting others or setting healthy boundaries in their relationships. She may feel anxious or insecure around people who remind her of her abuser., or you may have difficulty expressing her needs and desires clearly and directly.

Similarly, a person who has experienced the loss of a loved one may find it difficult to form strong emotional bonds with others, fearing another loss. She may be emotionally withdrawn or closed, or may have difficulty expressing her feelings or emotional needs.

Depends on the inputs received from the environment in childhood through parents, family, teachers, social culture, religion and friendships, we create a personality or another, it depends on what experiences have been lived, they can develop, in addition to injuries, traumas or disorders of the personality.

• You may be interested in: "The 6 characteristics of childhood traumas"

What to do to heal those emotional wounds from childhood?

When these emotional wounds are not adequately addressed, they can manifest in problems in our interpersonal relationships. For example, we can project our fears and insecurities onto others, which can lead to conflicts or misunderstandings. We may be more critical or mistrustful of others than we should be, which can lead to stress in our relationships.. We can have childish attitudes that give way to unnecessary discussions.

We may also find ourselves repeating patterns in our relationships that reflect the dynamics dysfunctional behaviors of our childhood, which can prevent us from building healthy relationships and satisfactory. The good news is that emotional wounds from childhood can heal with the right amount of time and effort. Some ways to address these wounds include:

1. Seek professional help

A therapist can help people explore and address emotional wounds from childhood., and to develop strategies to better manage their emotions and interpersonal relationships.

• Related article: "The 10 benefits of going to psychological therapy"

2. practice self-compassion

Learning to treat ourselves with kindness and compassion can help reduce emotional pain and build greater self-esteem and self-confidence.

3. Identify patterns in our relationships

Being aware of dysfunctional patterns in our relationships can help us identify underlying emotional wounds and to take steps to address them.

4. work on communication

Learning to communicate clearly and effectively can help reduce misunderstandings and conflict in our relationships, and build stronger emotional bonds.

5. Learn to set healthy boundaries

Setting healthy boundaries in our relationships is critical to giving ourselves and being given the respect we can all enjoy., but that because of the wounds we are not aware of being deserving.

6. Work on your self-awareness

Write about yourself, about how your childhood was, about the things that hurt you and what you would have liked to have been different and how.

7. Improve your inner dialogue

Improving the way we treat ourselves mentally and even aloud is essential to improve self-confidence and self-concept.

Conclusion

The improvement of our relations are an inevitable consequence of these actions, we are at a time in history where we have more trained and educated population than the previous generations, we have unlimited access to information, taboos have been broken and thousands of topics are freely discussed including the traumas and wounds of childhood.

It is about each one assuming the individual responsibility of seeking and ensuring their psychological well-being.