Overthinking: An Enemy for Self-Esteem

We are constantly told about the importance of thinking things through before making decisions, of processing response options In order not to make mistakes in the choices that we must make in daily life, thinking about whether it is not something inappropriate is something normal and vital.

However, what happens when we think too much? When does this thinking and thinking become a lifestyle that leads to indecision and/or frustration?

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Understanding the tendency to overthink

Overthinking is a destructive and toxic habit, the more we think about things, the more lost we are, the more we postpone what we have to do. Over-thinking too much decreases energy, mentally exhausts, stresses, generates anxiety and in more critical cases if not controlled can lead to depression, as we start to feel worse and worse about our lives, about ourselves. And that harms our health, well-being, quality of life and, over time, our self-esteem.

Sometimes we think things too much and we do not prosper in what we have to do, we afflict our lives reminding ourselves over and over again of the failures of the past, we are overwhelmed with our present problems and worry about the uncertainty of the future, people have more than 5000 thoughts a day and most of these thoughts are repetitive, this daily habit of thinking the same thing over and over again like a broken record, makes us fall into loops of unwanted, negative and unsuccessful thoughts, ruminating a thought throughout the day is so detrimental and harmful to our lives, since that in which that we focus our attention grows and if our attention is focused on the bad, on the negative of life, this ends up configuring our reality and in about us.

• You may be interested in: "Intrusive thoughts: why they appear and how to manage them"

Why overthinking wears out self-esteem?

The problem with thinking too much is that it is not easy to identify the thought cycle when we are immersed in it, so without realizing it we end up falling into Often in these repetitive thoughts that get us nowhere, we try to convince ourselves that thinking about things so much is a good thing for us, since it makes sense that The more we think about something, the better decisions we will make, the more prepared we will be to avoid making the mistakes of the past, and the more tools we will have to face the challenges of the future. future.

We say that thinking too much is an enemy of self-esteem, since when a ruminating thought arises, we feel bad about ourselves, the procrastination and inaction, which has an impact on seeking activities that allow us to distract ourselves from it such as: drinking, smoking, looking for company, consuming psychoactive substances, generating addictions (gambling, sex, cell phone, social networks), which provide ephemeral, circumstantial and momentary well-being, but when their effect ends they end up deteriorating self-esteem, self-awareness and self-esteem. selfconcept.

warning signs

Some signs that indicate that we are having the habit of thinking too muchor are:

• sleeping difficulties (interrupt the sleep cycle thinking about what happened, happens or will happen).
• Difficulties in making decisions where in the end none is made or if there is a choice it is doubtful that it was the correct one.
• Continually remember moments of the day when negative feelings towards ourselves arise.
• Asking too many questions like what if? Or, why has this happened to me? (these are negative questions that open up ruminant thought loops).
• Difficult to focus.
• Constantly trying to imagine or interpret what other people think of us or what they have wanted to say or are going to be.

Tips

But how do we stop thinking and thinking? How do we disconnect from our negative and repetitive thought loops that we have throughout the day? How to do to think in a more adequate and healthy way?

A first step is to be aware that we are thinking too much; this allows us to detect the thought loops that block us, stop them and be alert to break that connection with attention, calm the mind by focusing attention on the present moment to the experience of the here and now, recognizing that our senses perceive, that we see, that we hear and that we feel moves us away from thoughts undesirables.

Another factor to take into account is recognize that this habit of overthinking is useless, nor at all productive, which, on the contrary, brings more negative consequences for us, our lives, since that limits us, generates indecision, frustration, deterioration of our social relationships and our self-esteem.

Finally, it is important to include in the daily routine activities that are productive for us and that promote our well-being, physical, emotional and social (eg, exercising, painting, dancing, reading, singing, etc.), one of the strategies to decrease thoughts ruminants, is not to become self-absorbed, but to be in alert interaction with the outside, in conclusion, it is to get out of the mind to give chance to live.