How to learn to accept criticism? 6 important tips

Nobody likes to be criticized since we tend to perceive such comments in a negative way.. It is common for people to feel attacked or undervalued when faced with criticism and therefore react negatively. However, you can always learn something from constructive criticism and it can even help us in our personal and professional development.

According to the opinion of experts in psychology, knowing how to accept criticism is a social skill that is not very widespread among the population. Very few people are capable of taking comments as an impulse to improve instead of an attack against themselves. After all, not knowing how to accept negative explanations hides something much deeper behind it related to a lack of self-confidence and an inferiority complex. If we are sure of ourselves, we should not be offended and in fact, we should have the capacity to assertively defend ourselves if we disagree.

Every time a criticism affects us a lot, it is important to stop in order to ask ourselves what our reaction is due to.

and what really bothers us about the comment received. Now, once my introspection exercise is over, how do I learn not to let criticism affect me so much? In today's article, we will answer this question using some advice from experts on the subject. Read on to find out how you can learn to better accept criticism and use it to your advantage to improve.

• We recommend you read: "The importance of being assertive (and 7 ways to achieve it)"

Learn to accept criticism

First of all, it is important to highlight that our negative reaction to criticism has a lot to do with the person who criticized us or the moment in which we received said comment. In this regard, psychologists comment that people close to us, such as a familiar, it does deserve our attention since, as a general rule, there is always some truth in its criticism.

Perhaps we are not aware of our actions and it is okay that sometimes someone who is important in our life informs us. On the other hand, the criticisms made by people who do not really know us, or who are not very important to us. us, they usually come from a concrete fact, where they generalize and therefore, it may not be so right.

However, we must learn to accept criticism both from people who are close to us and from those who are not. We understand that it is not an easy task, especially with those comments that are not raised in an assertive way but rather, they are based on feelings of anger or anger on the part of the other person. Therefore, here are some tips to learn how to cope with criticism properly:

1. time to process

After receiving a critique, take the time you need to review carefully so that you understand. Take a break and try not to act immediately. There is no expiration date, time is not the most important thing, but rather, the crucial thing is to break down the criticism to understand if the person is right, if you can get something positive out of it, if you have been excessively offended, why it has bothered you so much, etc.

We place a lot of emphasis on the need to stop and reflect since, in general, we always tend to react impulsively, defending ourselves and justifying our behavior. Thinking cold, taking distance, will make you not regret what you said and allows you to see things more clearly.

2. think twice

The most tempting thing after a criticism is to change, without thinking twice, what you have said or done. After all, it is the quickest and easiest way to get rid of the uncomfortable feeling and turn the page as soon as possible. As we commented before, this is not an appropriate attitude since it is important to reflect and try to understand where this comment comes from and if it is really justified.

Also, for your own peace of mind, it is important not to keep anything inside and if you have any questions, contact the person who made the review to ask for more explanations.. In fact, it is a way of showing involvement, interest and seriousness.

3. Stay with the positive part

The key is to pay attention to criticism that could make us better people or professionals, and put aside those negative comments about our traits, abilities or attitudes. We must focus on constructive criticism and not destructive ones. When someone comments something negative to you, as far as possible, you can try to make a change and see if you feel comfortable or something improves.

On the contrary, if you realize that it does not help you at all, thank the person for their comment and continue with yours. Remember that you are not always going to receive useful criticism. The important thing is that you trust yourself, stay with the positive parts and react assertively and respectfully to negative comments.

4. listen to the person

It is best to listen to the person, understand their frustration, their point of view, ask for information and specify. In the end, only if we listen to the person who criticizes us can we learn from their criticism. In order to communicate assertively, a key factor is active listening. We must pay full attention to the person's comment (even if we disagree) so that we can respond respectfully. With this we avoid misunderstandings and feelings of anguish, anger or anger.

5. Change the concept about criticism

No one is perfect, we all have flaws, and we can all improve in many ways. We can take advantage of criticism as that little push we need to become the best version of ourselves. Change the concept you have about criticism. Instead of viewing them as belittling, attacking, or something to be ashamed of, do a 180-degree turn and start seeing them as a help. Our attitude towards life can change how we see the world and of course, also criticism.

6. Discover why criticism affects us so much

If we often find that criticism causes us great discomfort and aggressive reactions, it is convenient to value everything we like about ourselves and discover everything we would like to change our person. It is very likely that the root of the problem is low self-esteem, a lack of appreciation, an inferiority complex, little security, etc.. If you have felt identified, we recommend seeking professional help to investigate the problem and thus acquire the necessary tools to learn to manage these situations and improve well-being staff.