6 keys to improve your communication in personal relationships

Many of the aspects of life capable of bringing us well-being and happiness go through knowing how to connect with the rest of people, whether in formal relationships (negotiations, job interviews ...) or informal (making friends, spending time in family…). The idea that everyone can seek happiness "on their own" and without taking others into account is very simplistic, if not directly misleading.

However, those people who experience problems in their personal relationships in their day to day do not have to be forced to resign themselves to this. There are several things we can do to enrich our social life and make it more satisfying, and among them, improving our communication skills is one of the most useful.

Starting from this idea, here we will review the most important key ideas to improve your communication in personal relationships of all kinds: at work, in relationships, when making friends, etc.

• Related article: "The 28 types of communication and their characteristics"

Key ideas to improve your communication in day-to-day relationships

Communicating well involves mastering a range of complex skills ranging from muscular coordination when speaking to structuring of coherent sentences, passing through the capacity for empathy and taking into account what the interlocutor knows and does not knows. That is why it is not easy to make progress in this kind of skills if we do not go from theory to practice.

However, these key ideas and strategies can help you make sustained important progress and frustrate you in unnecessary ways.

1. It is very important to look into the eyes

A good part of non-verbal communication is reflected in the way you use your gaze. If you speak without looking into their eyes, you will not only be expressing insecurity or even dishonesty; In addition, it will make your interlocutor feel less comfortable with the conversation, so that both You will do your part so that it ends as soon as possible by mutually reinforcing this attitude in the other.

However, do not become obsessed with keeping your gaze "fixed" on the other person's pupils. Just try not to push her away to any place other than her face for several seconds at a time. If you just direct it towards her face, you will spontaneously make eye contact.

2. Structure the ideas you want to convey by blocks

This will not only help you gain fluency when it comes to explaining yourself, by having a mind the structure of all the topics you want to go through. What's more, it will help the other person to assimilate this information and not forget it, by making it easy for them to connect some concepts with others.

3. It is almost always best to seek face-to-face conversations

Many aspects of communication depend on non-verbal language, and these are lost with the sending of written messages by letter, telephone or Internet.

Therefore, you must bear in mind that wherever you look establish a connection with someone on an emotional levelWhether it is to seek the complicity of the other person or to try to persuade them, it is much better to talk things face to face. For example, if you want to ask for a favor and you do it by writing an email, the chances that you will be able to convince your interlocutor will be much lower than if you spoke to him in person.

4. Practice active listening

The moments when you are not speaking are also important. Even if it is not your turn to speak while the other does, give signals that you are paying attention by applying what is known as “active listening”.

Let him see in the expressions on your face the way you are reacting to what he says, and let him notice that you follow the thread from small comments that you can leave here and there, without making them so long as to constitute a way of interrupt him.

• You may be interested in: "Can we listen? Important aspects of active listening "

5. Always keep in mind the ideas that you must communicate without leaving it for another moment

Maintaining a good level of assertiveness is key to improving communication; This consists of expressing what is important that you think deserves to be said, although adjusting it to what you know about the values, interests and expectations of your interlocutor, and Even if you know that some of the things you will say can cause pain: if it is important that you know them, do not leave it for "tomorrow" in order to avoid going through that bad drink in the Present.

To prevent you from falling into temptation, set concrete goals in this sense: "I will tell you before the end of the day today." That way you can also better propose how to adjust your message from empathy, without letting the problems accumulate over time and you have to end up saying it in the worst of contexts possible.

6. Keep in mind that the context modifies the meanings

It is not the same to "tease" someone as a joke at a party than to do it during a selection process in which both of you are candidates.

The context in which you are makes the interpretation of what you say change, although the literal message, taken word for word, is the same. This is so because our way of interpreting what others say is linked to the expectations of the moment. No message is emitted and captured in a vacuum, the environment is always part of the communication process. Therefore, get used to taking it into account so as not to give rise to misunderstandings.

Looking for psychotherapy services?

Communication skills can be enhanced through personalized treatment provided by professional psychological assistance. In fact, this kind of “training” programs in communication skills are usually one of the most important elements. frequent in the day-to-day life of psychologists, both in patient-centered therapy and in family therapy and partner. It is not necessary to have developed a psychological or psychiatric disorder to go to the psychologist to improve in this aspect.

So, if you are considering having professional psychological assistance or starting a psychotherapy process, get in touch with us.

On Advance Psychologists We work serving people of all ages through our child and adolescent therapy services and for adults, and we also offer family therapy, couples therapy, coaching and psychiatric assistance and neuropsychological. You can visit us at our psychology center located in Madrid or opt for our online therapy modality by video call.