How to express emotional pain in an appropriate way: 8 tips

Regardless of our intentions and our interests, our emotions always condition the way we behave. But, although we cannot take full control of our emotional side, we can modulate the way in which it expresses itself. And this is especially important when what happens to us has to do with the misnamed negative emotions, which are those linked to psychological discomfort.

Know how to express emotional pain in an appropriate way in our lives and in our personal relationships It is therefore very important, because if this task is left unattended, moments of crisis can aggravate the problems in which we are involved. Outbursts of uncontrolled anger, unjustified hostility, the adoption of a paralyzing defeatism... These are psychological states that can sink us even more if we do not manage them well.

• Related article: "8 activities to work on emotions"

Why it is important to express emotional pain in a healthy way

If there is something in which human beings fail when it comes to managing our emotions, that is trying to deny what makes us feel bad.

Whatever we do, we will always live experiences that make us suffer, and trying to show that they have not occurred or that they do not affect us is not something that helps; Unlike.

If we try to deny or omit what makes us feel bad, it is more likely that at the wrong time that will cause us to act in an unforeseen and difficult way to control. Emotions always make their way through our actions and the way we express ourselves, and we better be prepared to modulate, even a little, those moments in which our emotional side takes control.

Thus, if we find ways to channel the emotions linked to psychological distress, we will be able to prevent them from being misinterpreted or causing more pain to other people.

How to modulate and express emotional pain well

In order to get your emotions from psychological pain, the following tips can help you.

1. Talk it over with someone close

Being able to match your own ideas about how you feel with what others think about those ideas helps a lot.

On the one hand, it allows us to verbally express how we feel, and all this in a safe environment in which we feel supported. For the other, allows to relativize the importance of some events that cause us emotional pain. And it is that, seen from a somewhat more serene and distanced perspective, some events lose dramatic power and we are able to face them in a more constructive way. Having a second or third opinion helps to detect those ideas that are based on excessive pessimism.

2. Release tensions in a controlled way: do sports

There are painful emotions that lead us to a state of constant tension and alertness. In order to express its effects in a suitable and healthy way, there is nothing like doing sports. If we exercise our muscles, part of this "overload" of energy will be invested in these tasks that require us to control our attention focus well. After these sessions, the emotional pain may still be there, but we will no longer experience it from a feeling of alarm.

3. Have an explanation ready about what happens to you

You should consider the possibility of informing the rest of what happens to you so that they know how to interpret certain unusual behaviors well on your part.

The simple fact of having that information ready will prevent you from avoiding facing these situations (improvising a “report” on what you It happens precisely when you are suffering the consequences of that discomfort is not comfortable and you may prefer not to do it, if necessary).

• Related article: "What is emotional intelligence? Discovering the importance of emotions"

4. Avoid hot discussions

When we are fully suffering the effects of emotional pain, this is not the time to argue. Before any indication that conflictive situations may appear, it is worth leaving the discussion for another time. Also, it is good that you explicitly say that you postpone that conversation for exactly that. Especially in these situations, honesty is a value to claim.

5. Use relaxation techniques

Intervening on physiological processes can greatly reduce anxiety. Doing this, we act on one of the fundamental aspects of behavior and mental state experienced, as reducing anxiety creates a chain reaction that will generally prove beneficial.

• Related article: "6 easy relaxation techniques to combat stress"

6. Write a diary

Keeping track of how you feel daily will help you better understand what is happening to you as you express that emotional pain. Rereading those pages will make it easier to work constructively to solve the underlying problem., either by modifying things in your environment or working on your emotions and your philosophy of life.

7. Be careful with the food

Binge eating is a common trap that many people who go through bad times or are prey to anxiety fall into. Eating offers an immediate reward, a feeling of pleasure that allows us to mask for a short period what we would like to forget. Therefore, the best possible trick is to keep a very systematic control on what you ingested, and not to expose yourself to the temptations. For example, literally stay away from the most addictive foods.

8. Remember that no one has the absolute truth

Something that helps a lot to express emotional pain in a healthy way is being aware that you do not have the absolute truth about what is happening yourself. That means anger, sadness, or feelings of defeat They are not elements that are there, existing independently of us, as if they were realities that we know and nothing else. We not only know them: we also create them.