Tears: a positive sign in crying resistant patients
Some time ago, in clinical practice, I saw a number of clients prone to crying. Crying in therapy is not uncommon, and it has to do with the emotional implications of the content and memories that are being worked on. But other patients showed more resistance to crying; These cases can be challenging for many therapists.
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What happens when a patient is resistant to crying and does not cry?
Crying is an emotional and physical expression at the brain level, related to a large number of neurotransmitters and hormones that serve a relaxation function.
Within the psychological community there is a saying that "If a patient cries, he is healing", and from some psychological currents, this could have a certain veracity. But when a patient is resistant to crying, many therapists make the mistake of re-searching the depths of the patient's life to release her suffering through crying. This is counterproductive, because insisting that the patient cry could cause conflict in the therapeutic relationship
, since our objective as psychologists is not for the patient to "cry", but to solve the conflict that presents us, although crying is one more part of the way to solve this objective, in some cases cases.The recommendation is to let the patients take their own pace and the therapeutic bond is built block by block. Work on patience and unconditional acceptance it is a good key to successful treatment in these patients.
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The resistant patient cries in session What does it mean?
Here are some of the implications of a patient crying in therapy.
1. Acceptance of suffering
Many of the patients who come to the consultation are in deep denial of their conflicts, both internal and external, they are reluctant to remove the blindfold. When the patient succeeds in adopting a new approach, this it can be an explosion of new emotions and behaviors that might terrify you. At this point everything will depend on the therapist and his working methodology.
2. Therapist acceptance
Some patients go through several sessions without delving into their conflicts, as they seem to put the ethics of the therapist to the test. It is normal that at the beginning of therapy they may not have enough confidence to show their weaker and fragile side; Thus, when the patient falls into tears, this is a sign of confidence and it is positive for creating a strong therapeutic bond.
3. Possible depression or associated diagnoses
In some cases there are patients who are "Atypical", since they manifest depressive symptoms but there is no sadness, crying, etc. We would be facing an atypical case and not a resistance to conventional crying. It is important to evaluate thoroughly in order to rule out a diagnosis of a mental disorder. In these cases, the ideal is to refer to a clinical specialist or to the area of psychiatry if the case is serious.
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4. Rupture of beliefs
As a short anecdote, I had the experience of treating several patients who were reluctant to cry because their beliefs included They found some such as: "crying is something of little women", "crying is a sign of weakness" and in the worst case "crying is of homosexuals ”.
In the consultation it is common to find these types of patients who have grown up in a macho cultureTherefore, you must work on patience and work with "tweezers" those beliefs. When these beliefs begin to become doubtful and maladaptive for psychic health, then the tears are likely to begin to flow.
A sign that the therapist is doing well
When patients indulge in tears after so much psychotherapeutic work, it is certainly a good sign. In these cases, the therapist is on the right track. Keeping up with the pace of change in patients is not at all a simple job, it is hard and exhausting, but rewarding. Taking care of both emotional health is essential.
