How to lose the fear of making a fool of yourself: 8 key tips

Fear is a natural feeling, and it doesn't always play a negative role in our lives. In fact, it can protect us from situations that are dangerous for us, or that are considered as associated with a risk. But it can become a problem when the feeling of fear is intense and limiting.

Next we will see how to lose the fear of making a fool of yourselfTaking into account that the perceptions that trigger this thought do not always correspond to reality: we are not always exposed to public derision.

• Related article: "Extreme shyness: what it is, causes, and how to overcome it"

How to lose the fear of making a fool of yourself in front of others

Some of the people who have problems because of the fear of being ridiculed in front of others have developed a disorder known as social phobia; In these cases, the anxiety they suffer is extreme and prevents them from living normally, so it is necessary that they go to the psychologist to get over that (luckily, phobias generally respond very well to treatment, and fade within a few months if help is available professional). However, in most cases, those "nerves" linked to social interactions do not become psychopathologies, and although going to therapy helps, in situations like this it is not essential to go to therapy and it is enough to adopt certain strategies and habits to gain fluency when socialize.

In this sense, below we are going to explain how to lose the fear of making a fool of yourself, through a series of simple tips, so that you can strengthen your security.

1. Keep in mind that nobody is perfect

If you are able to remove from your mind the misconception that others are more prepared than you, you will begin to cope better in any situation. Like you, other people must also go through a learning process, and yet they are not free to make a mistake.

So what we have to do is trust in our abilities and not be afraid of being exposed or criticized by others. Perhaps those who are wrong are the others, and you have the opportunity to make them see their mistake (always with a cordial but assertive attitude). Or maybe they are right in their criticisms, and you learn from them.

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2. Face your traumas

Past traumas represent one of the main sources of insecurity in people. Many times we are not able to face what hurt us and we live limited by the fear of reliving those circumstances again.

To get rid of that weight, it is necessary to do an exercise in personal recognition and stop at those thoughts that we find unpleasant. Rather than avoiding, let's take a closer look at how we can stop these circumstances from affecting our lives. Avoiding totally exposing yourself to certain situations only fuels complexes.

3. Learn to laugh at yourself

Not all things that make us feel uncomfortable have to be drama. In fact, if instead of being uncomfortable you manage to see your situation as something funny, the unpleasant feeling will begin to dissipate.

With this I do not mean that you go around laughing at everything negative that happens to you, but that if we change the perspective with which we see things, we will be able to experience less discomfort and we will be able to have a better mood before adversities.

By taking things with a sense of humor, the tension goes down and everyone around you relaxes. With this attitude you will be able to show that you are not a ridiculous person, but someone who knows how to take the stress out of things, which is a fabulous virtue.

4. Train your safety

Safety, like most things, is an attitude that can be trained. The ideal is to find a controlled environment, where you have privacy and can imagine yourself in certain situations.

The idea is that you manage to master these scenarios from practice, rehearsing how you will do it When the moment comes. It doesn't have to be an important presentation, it can be something from your everyday life. For example, if you plan to talk to the person you like, you can rehearse in your safe place.

This method will work for you to acquire security and naturalness before facing a socially complex situation that makes us nervous. No lines of dialogue to memorize, but rather gain ease and have various possibilities and your possible actions planned in each case.

5. Avoid prejudice

Prejudices are generalized thoughts from which the person is not able to evaluate situations beyond a pre-established conception. Furthermore, prejudice is characterized by being radical and exaggerated. When we think that we must please everyone so as not to fall into a certain type of pigeonhole, shyness and anxiety take over.

We are afraid of making a fool of ourselves in an attempt to please someone, and this situation can generate a feeling of constant unease and uncertainty. You must be aware that you are not obliged to please everyone always, and do not feel bad about it.

6. Show yourself vulnerable

Vulnerability does not imply weakness; In fact, if you have the ability to talk about the things that made you feel vulnerable at times, the people will feel more confident with you and you will take the weight off of having to look like a perfect version of you.

Remember that in general, human beings tend to imitate the attitude of our interlocutors in the social interactions that we have on a day-to-day basis. In the same way that if you show discomfort in a conversation the other person will also feel uncomfortable, if you show confidence when expressing things that show your vulnerabilities or that reflect your honesty, the other person will also relax more and be more transparent with you, less obsessed with conventions social.

7. Set goals

To overcome fears the ideal is to start small. Something that works quite well is to set daily goals and keep meeting them, so that you can track your progress. As you progress in meeting these goals, you can put on some more demanding ones.

For example, if we are afraid of making a fool of ourselves when talking to others; Our goal should be to initiate at least three conversations a day with strangers. Little by little you will see how you will gain confidence in yourself and in your abilities to interact with others.

8. Accept yourself

It is about the acceptance that we must have in ourselves, including the things we like and the things we don't like. As you see yourself as a whole, you will learn to value every aspect of yourself. Even your flaws are part of you, learn to live with them in harmony.

Bibliographic references:

• Hofmann SG, Dibartolo PM (2010). Introduction: Toward an Understanding of Social Anxiety Disorder. Social Anxiety.
• Hofmann, S.G.; Smits, J.A. (2008). Cognitive-behavioral therapy for adult anxiety disorders: A meta-analysis of randomized placebo-controlled trials. The Journal of Clinical Psychiatry, 69 (4): pp. 621 - 632.
• Shelton, C.I. (2004). Diagnosis and Management of Anxiety Disorders. The Journal of the American Osteopathic Association, 104 (3 Suppl 1): pp. S2 - S5.
• Stein, M.D.; Murray, B.; Gorman, M.D., Jack, M. (2001). Unmasking social anxiety disorder. Journal of Psychiatry & Neuroscience, 26 (3): pp. 185 - 189.
• Stephan, W.G.; Stephan, C.W. (1985). Intergroup Anxiety. Journal of Social Issues.