Couples therapy and its link with sexuality

In most cases, the health of the love bond What is in a relationship has a lot to do with the way they live their sexuality.

And it is that except in the case of asexual people, sexual life is linked to the way in which the vast majority of people express their affection for the person with whom they are in a relationship of partner; it is not just a matter of pleasure or fun.

Therefore, when a couple going through bad times decides to go to couples therapy, one of the aspects of life that many times they reveal problems is sexuality. Let's see how this connection is established between these two areas of intimate life.

• Related article: "The 5 types of couples therapy"

The link between the relationship and sexuality

With the passage of time, what we understand by love has changed a lot, to the point that several centuries the affection that united two people involved in a couple was very little like the current love Romantic. However, that the type of affective bond that predominates in couples today is conditioned by culture does not mean that it does not make sense, or that it is arbitrary.

In fact, there is a theme that has always gone hand in hand with the experience of love as a couple: sexuality. This set of behaviors and intimate interactions is one of the basic ways of expressing affection in actions, and possibly it has been uninterrupted since before the appearance of language.

It is true that sexual behavior is not used only to express love, but whenever there is love as a couple (except for the exceptions that we have seen from asexual people), there is sexuality. Which does not mean that loving each other means making love a lot, but it does mean finding a balance in the way you live sex together; a compatibility difficult to describe in words, because it has more to do with chemistry than with what is rational or logical.

Thus, if a sexual mismatch arises in a relationship, it is possible that at first nothing significant happens, but in the medium and long term they tend to appear problems. Fears in these cases are common, as well as insecurity and even compensatory behavior, which in turn brings more problems. Thus, a chain reaction appears that can be added to other difficulties that the relationship is going through, facilitating a relationship crisis to begin to manifest itself.

In the same way, couple problems that in principle have nothing to do with sexuality tend to "leak" also in this area of ​​the relationship, which usually leads to the search for self-satisfaction or boredom in case of conflicts and arguments, for example, or passivity and fear of failure, if a dependent and submissive partner role is assumed, for example. To practice, it is almost impossible to totally dissociate sexual relations from the rest of the things that happen in a relationship with a partner.

Couples therapy and sexuality

Having seen the above, it is not surprising that many people go to the psychologist looking for couples therapy, when what they really need is a combination of couples therapy and therapy sexual. Ultimately, these are communicating vessels, for better or for worse, and When a problem appears in one of these areas, it also affects the other. Fortunately, this also means that the underlying problem can be tackled both ways.

Let's see how the teams of psychologists work to help those who need professional support both in the way of relating to their sexuality as in the way of communicating, living together and expressing affection in other aspects of the lifetime.

What is done in couples therapy?

Couples therapy is a form of psychological intervention done in a group of three (the therapy professional, and the members of the couple, who attend the sessions at the same time). In this process, a communication space is created emphasizing the need not to prejudge and let each person express themselves honestly, and then seek common solutions, on the one hand, and train new habits that reinforce the love bond.

Thus, psychologists help to adopt the theory of what it means to live well and love each other, but above all practice, proposing routines and tasks to be practiced between the sessions and that modify both the lifestyle and the beliefs of each of the patients, acting both individually and as a couple in constant interaction.

What is done in sex therapy?

Although sexual therapy is independent of the previous one (it can be used in people who do not have a partner), these areas often overlap, as we have seen. It is a service in which the person is helped to improve the fullness of their sexual life, both in the company of someone and alone.

It is not only about solving possible secondary dysfunctions; even someone without such disorders can benefit from the positive effects of sex therapy, which in most cases are reflected even just in self-confidence, acceptance of one's own body and one's own nudity, the greater predisposition to please both the other person and oneself, etc.

• You may be interested: "Sex therapy: what is it and what are its benefits"

Where to start?

If you are interested in having professional help in the area of ​​the couple or in the area of ​​sexuality, make sure you have the assistance of clinics that offer both couples therapy and therapy sexual.

For example, our psychology center in Barcelona, ​​PsicoTools, has both individual psychotherapy and couples therapy services, and our team also has an expert in sex therapy.

If you are interested in knowing more or seeing our contact information, click click here.