How to promote good family relationships?

Each family is unique, and the type of relationships that are established between the people who form it can be very diverse.

The family is part of one of the main areas in which we develop as people and, therefore, everything that happens in it and relationships that we establish with the other members of the same will affect the way in which we relate to other people as well as our well-being general.

We therefore want to offer some guidelines that allow generating more positive and appropriate relationships between family members.

• Related article: "The 8 types of family conflicts and how to manage them"

5 recommendations to improve family relationships

Follow these recommendations to apply them to the day-to-day life of your family.

1. Communication

We could say that it is a cornerstone that underpins the right relationships. It consists of having good communication, listening to others, making sure that what we say reaches our interlocutor, that the message has arrived properly and that we are willing to listen to the other person.

Especially we must devote attention and time to listen to our children. Sometimes we consider them passive subjects within the family, and this is falling into a mistake, since in the end they are one more piece of the family gear.

2. I respect

It is essential to understand that family relationships must be based on respect. What's more, It is important that if we want to instill “respect” towards someone we are an example of it as educators. For this reason it is much more beneficial that we communicate with others in an appropriate way.

Do not confuse setting limits and norms or even having moments of discussion with falling into insults, scorn and reproaches. Respect must be bilateral and not unilateral.

3. Understanding and empathy

One of the main problems that psychologists encounter when they exist problems in family relationships is the lack of empathy or understanding of the other's position family.

We make a lot of the mistake of thinking that "what I feel" is more important than what others feel or that our opinion or preference should be valued more as well as being in “possession of the truth”. It is of special relevance to be able to understand that each person lives their reality in a unique way and that what for me it may be the "right" or "the right way" to do something, it doesn't have to be for the other person.

Trying to focus on why the other person thinks, what they feel and how to help them fosters trust, a feeling of security and being able to communicate more appropriately, since it will always be easier to express something when we see that another person is showing us understanding.

• You may be interested in: "The 10 basic communication skills"

4. Give and take positive

If we want to improve relationships It is not enough to eliminate possible discussions or moments of tension, but it is also important to be able to generate positive emotions. As with a couple, if in the family environment we do not find anything that makes us feel good and that we like is more likely to end up spending little time with others and relationships will go away cooling down.

Finding common ground, joint activities that can make us enjoy as a family is essential to improve these relationships. Here also appears the factor of "giving in" and understanding that sometimes doing something for others even though I don't particularly like it is not a negative thing. Giving in would always be a problem, but doing so eventually is not.

5. Conflict resolution / reaching agreements

Normalizing that the discussions will occur on many occasions but that there are always effective ways of dealing with it will allow us to manage these situations in a much more appropriate way. In the same way it is important that we let the other person express themselves and give their arguments.

Once we have presented the arguments, it is best to try to reach agreements whenever possible, but sometimes it will not be achieved and leaving the discussion aside can also be a way of solve it.

Final Recommendations

It should be noted that these are some important recommendations and factors, but they are by no means an exact formula. It is necessary to analyze in each family what are the main reasons for conflict or why there are difficulties in relationships. Each family and family dynamics is very different, and therefore solutions must be adapted to different types of problems. Even so, these recommendations are part of the basis for establishing good relationships between family members.

It is also important to comment that sometimes "having a good relationship" is confused with "consent". That is, sometimes it is thought that the best way to maintain a good relationship with the children is through permissiveness and giving everything the person wants. This can lead to problems regarding family limits and norms, developing later conflicts, especially during adolescence.

Finally, family relationships can sometimes be improved with a few techniques and tools but, in some cases, the problems are much more ingrained, have become generalized over time or become more complex, for which the help of a psychologist may be required to guide the family members. If this is your case you can contact us, our staff will contact you to offer you the best tools.