Why are there people who are always late for appointments?
Jul 16, 2021
It seems incredible, but there are people who seem unable to get to places on time despite planning their schedules and having their eyes fixed constantly on the clock. It is problematic, especially when this delay, which is related to the time the trip started towards the meeting place, they are joined by last minute unforeseen events, or when there is not much trust with the people who are waiting.
Being late is usually a nuisance for both the person who waits and the person who is late. and, nevertheless, it is very common to go out on time (or even at the time that has been left). How can it be explained that it is so hard for us to learn from mistakes and get out early? There are different reasons that can explain the existence of these "chronic latecomers".
Possible reasons for being late (always, everywhere)
There must be some explanation why certain people are very prone to being late everywherewhile others display English punctuality. Could this difference have something to do with some psychological aspect?
1. Being too narcissistic
The people of narcissistic personality They are prone to problems when it comes to putting themselves in the shoes of others. That implies, among other things, that they will not assume the fact that every time they are late they will cause discomfort to third parties and, in fact, they may find the sensation of being expect.
Ultimately, forcing yourself to be late for sites is one way of creating the illusion that you are is important enough that everyone has to wait to enjoy their company. However, these cases are not very frequent.
2. Last minute racing addiction
It may be difficult to understand, but the need to find shortcuts or methods to move fast and the adrenaline release associated with being late can be seen as something of a sport: you are late for a strange kind of pleasure.
And as such, it is possible that it generates addiction. So it is understandable that some people take it as such, albeit in a way unconscious, and use the slightest appointment or meeting as an excuse to live a little adventure to time trial.
3. You don't want to arrive early
This reason is the most sensible from a cost-benefit logic. There are many reasons why someone may not want to arrive even a minute before the agreed time, and none of these have to be the intention to cause problems for others.
- Waiting is unproductive. Arriving early can be perceived as a waste of time. It does not give the feeling of serving a clear utility. Faced with the prospect of arriving too early and doing nothing for a while, many people may delay their departure precisely by doing things that are apparently productive, such as cleaning the house, reading a book, or even taking time to rest, something that could be done while waiting. Ironically, this drive toward productivity leading to chronic retardation would probably not be there if not have the perception of having to choose between that or spend an unproductive time in the place agreed for the meeting.
- It's boring. Arriving ahead of time means spending a time of monotony and discomfort. Waiting for someone means being immobile for a few minutes, with nothing to do and without being able to go anywhere else. Just as it is known that the other person can get upset if they have to wait too long, the person who tends to leave late knows that they can also be harmed if they have to wait.
- Affects self-image. For some people, waiting is a small challenge in which we must appear interesting and offer a positive image of ourselves while being still because others have decided to do so. You can smoke, look at your smartphone, put calculated poses... A situation similar to the one that occurs when we go in the elevator with strangers.
Some psychological conclusions
Definitely, for these people arriving in advance is not a positive thingbut a possibility to avoid. Therefore, they rule out the possibility of leaving a few minutes earlier (either due to a conscious or unconscious decision), they only have the option of arriving just at the agreed time or later. And, since the "later" alternative is made up of more moments than the first option, it is the more likely of the two possibilities. Outcome: late arrivals, forever.
So now you know: if you think that any of these three reasons explains most of the cases in which you are late, the main thing is to recognize it and fight so that this stops being the case. That yes, do not leave it for tomorrow.