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Cuckolding: the fantasy of infidelity

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The concept of infidelity assumed behind this word is for most couples a cause for concern and fear, to the point that it can generate the appearance of jealousy (justified or not) and even serious conflicts of partner. It is an act that, unless it has been agreed in advance (for example, having an open relationship), is generally experienced as a betrayal of the relationship, being finding your partner in bed the nightmare of many and many.

However, some people may find the fact that their partner maintains relationships with other people erotic, to the point that a trend has emerged in this regard: the so-called cuckolding or cuckqueaning.

  • Related article: "Filias and paraphilias: definition, types and characteristics"

Cuckolding: concept of this sexual modality

The concept of cuckolding, whose approximate translation would be something like "Cheating" or "being unfaithful", currently also refers to a sexual trend or practice based on obtaining sexual gratification through the observation or the story of his partner having relations with a third person.

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Technically cuckolding would refer to the practice in which a man obtains sexual satisfaction from observing his partner maintaining relationships with another man, while cuckqueaning would be the case of those women who are turned on by seeing their partner with other woman. In general, however, cuckolding is more frequent (that is, the observer is male).

In couples in which this practice is carried out, the part that does not have sexual relations Finds gratifying and exciting that your partner has them with someone else and he can see you, or have your partner tell you about the encounter. This can subsequently arouse passion between both partners and serve as an enhancer for joint sexual life. It is not impossible either that masturbatory behaviors appear while the observation / report is taking place.

Many couples consider this practice as satisfying, generating emotions and enhancing joint sexual life. However, it is necessary that it is something agreed and freely accessed by both parties, without pressure of any kind and without forcing yourself to do it to please the other party.

Although rare, cuckolding is a normative sexual activity and can be an experience for those who really want to do it. However, when it is the only or practically the only cause of sexual arousal for the observer and generates discomfort or interference in their normal functioning can be constituted as a paraphilia, called troilism.

  • You may be interested: "5 basic principles to enjoy a full and satisfying sexuality"

Booming practice, previously rejected

In recent times cuckolding / cuckqueaning has been spreading among the population, becoming a trend and breaking through the usual sexual fantasies.

However, it is far from being a majority practice. It is not a practice for everyone: it assumes that the couple is going to be having sex with another person and this is unpleasant for many people.

In fact, until relatively few years ago it was a socially rejected practice by the majority of society. And it is that cuckolding is a practice that has been poorly regarded, like many other sexual tendencies.

For example, it has a certain relationship with the idea of ​​the exchange of couples, being a similar concept. In this case, the couple agrees on the situation beforehand, being something accepted by both parties. It is also related to voyeurism and exhibitionism, since part of the erotic component is seen / received a description of what happened or being looked at / recounted the relationship.

Possible causes of the appearance of arousal

The fact that seeing another man or woman having sexual relations with one's partner is something sexual exciting is something that may seem strange to many people, and whose meaning has tried to be explained by various authors.

One of the existing theories proposes that part of the arousal may be due to the fact that when the sexual partner maintains relationships with another, it is breaking with the social norm of monogamy. The pleasure would be obtained from the defiance of the stipulated. Also in the case of couples in which the non-active party is present watching the situation, the subject can visualize the fantasy while having some control of the situation.

Another perspective has a more biological aspect, the excitement may be derived from a behavior observed in multiple animal species: when in internal reproduction species a male copulates with a female paired with another male and he observes the interaction, in many cases he himself proceeds to copulate with the female in order to interfere with the semen of the previous copulation. This is what is called sperm competition. Likewise, different investigations seem to show that human semen is of higher quality and is produced in greater quantity in situations of competition with other competitors. This last theory, although viable, does not explain why the cuckqueaning.

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