Emotions at your service: understanding your emotions can change your life

Human beings are, above all, emotional beings. Quite contrary to what we think, we do not feel emotions at certain times of the day, but we are always excited.

Behind everything you do, think and interpret, there is an emotional state. All our experiences, and also all our problems and conflicts, are totally related to your emotions. What if you learned to understand and manage them to have them in your favor instead of against you?

• Related article: "Emotional psychology: main theories of emotion"

Understanding emotions

From psychology, multiple efforts have been made to try to understand our emotions, what they really are, what they mean and how they influence your life. However, academic psychology, in its main objective to consolidate itself as a discipline, has studied emotions from a materialistic and biological profile: a set of hormonal reactions and chemistry, as well as facial expressions. But are they just that?

Experimental psychology rescues six basic emotions according to the results obtained in the laboratory (which studies both neurological connections and facial expressions):

joy, fear, disgust, surprise, sadness and anger.

However, our emotions are much more complex. Any of these emotions includes a multitude of nuances, they vary in intensity, duration, frequency, and they condition us in different ways. Your emotions continue to be a subjective experience for you: what you feel, how you interpret it, how it conditions you, and how it can change. Have you realized that behind everything that happens to you in your day to day there are emotions?

In my work as a psychologist and coach, with more than 11 years of experience accompanying people in their processes of personal change, we always discover that after any kind of difficulty there are emotions. The reason is simple (I have already told you above): we are emotional beings. We feel emotions 24 hours a day (even when you dream you feel emotions). Therefore, your emotions influence everything: in how you behave, in how you communicate, in how you make decisions, in how you relate.

They influence your way of seeing life, your partner, a possible breakup, a problem at work, in a personal, social or family context. In turn, it seems that they are always against us... afraid, go to, anxiety, insecurity, guilt, discouragement... Are emotions really the problem?

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A focus problem: your emotions are your best allies and not a problem

I imagine that you have heard or read expressions like "negative emotions" a thousand times, or "it is a problem to be too emotional". The focus problem we have with our emotions lies in these ideas.

We are emotional beings and, therefore, emotions are part of all our processes. We make decisions with our emotionsWe fall in love through emotions, we also set limits or are aware of who we are through emotions. Self-knowledge, relationships, personal development, are above all processes where emotion plays a key role.

However, we live in a materialistic and globalized age, where we still continue to think about emotions according to that Cartesian duality that opposes emotion to reason. But are they really dual? Emotion and reason are united processes, totally indivisible.

Social prejudices such as machismo, xenophobia, homophobia, aporophobia, or simply having difficulties relating to others, undertaking a certain project or face difficulties as a couple, they are not due to a difficulty in our reasoning, but because we do not know how to understand and manage the emotions that are behind all these experiences.

No, reason does not work without emotion. The most important decisions in our life come through emotional processes. At the same time, we continue to make the same mistake: we do not know how to understand and manage them so that, instead of being against us, they are in our favor. Because emotions are not the problem nor are they really negative.

The afraid It helps you protect your life, just as anger can help you know where to set a limit. Our problem is related to knowing how to understand and manage them. And what happens when we don't know how to do it? That everything that happens to us is more difficult.

That is where the basis of the vast majority of our problems lies: not knowing how to understand and manage the emotional process that exists behind the problem (which conditions even the way you see it and interpret it).

• You may be interested in: "'I'm down': 3 tips to overcome that feeling"

The solution: have them at your service

The importance of emotion management leads us to if we want to achieve certain changes in our life but we neglect this plot, the table remains lame. As much as we want to work with our beliefs, attitudes or relationships, nothing works if we do not go to the fundamental energy that conditions that experience. This is something that becomes evident in my work as a psychologist.

At the same time, I knew that the vast majority of information that exists about emotions (formations, workshops, etc.) are not really useful if we do not apply real changes in our life through a process of change. For this reason I decided to make a decision (also emotional): to put everything I learned in the last 11 years into a book. It is about "Emotions at your service".

Emotions at your service It is not just another book on emotion management or emotional intelligence. Is about a journey through your own emotions, to help you think about them, discover them and learn how to manage them so that they help you get to know yourself better and achieve changes, but not through general advice, but through your own discovery.

In Emotions at your service you can discover what emotions really are (it is something much deeper than that we create), how they work, and above all that chapter by chapter you can apply the changes you need in your lifetime. We delve into your vision, your relationships, your work, and even the relationship between emotions and health (and no, it is not what we popularly believe).

Being a book related to your well-being and personal development, I believe that it should be accessible to anyone. For this reason, you can find it on Amazon easily for a reasonable price. You can even get it in a Kindle version for free (if you have a subscription) or for a very low cost.

I hope it helps you as much as the people who already have it with them. Now it is about taking that step that leads you to discover that what weighs the most, as emotions are sometimes, are actually the source of self-knowledge that can help you the most.