12 tips to overcome emotional dependence

When your happiness depends on other people, then you are an emotionally dependent person.. This problematic situation causes you to feel addicted to your partner even though things between you are not going well.

And even if you already know that you have not been well in your relationship for a long time, you do not have enough strength to take a step forward by the fear of uncertainty or of not trusting yourself when facing the situations that may appear in your day to day. You are afraid of being alone, and you prefer to stay there knowing that you are not happy.

If you feel identified with this and you think it would be positive to get out of this situation, in this article you can see some keys and tips to become an emotionally independent person.

How to get out of this painful situation

Although men often hide this problem out of shame to acknowledge and express that they emotionally depend on another person, this phenomenon affects both sexes equally.

Emotional dependence causes great suffering because

who experiences it thinks they are unable to live without the other person, and occurs when she has low self-esteem or wrong beliefs about what a relationship should be. It is a type of immature love that has no future. It takes courage and bravery to learn to overcome emotional dependence, but it is worth doing so so that one is finally able to take control of one's own life.

• If you want to know what a healthy love is like, you can read our article: "Mature love: why is the second love better than the first?”

Tips to overcome emotional dependence

If you want to overcome emotional dependence and become a person with greater autonomy and independence, you can follow the advice that you will find below:

1. Be honest with yourself and acknowledge that there is a problem

One of the most difficult things to do when someone is in this situation is to reflect deeply on what is happening. It is easier to look the other way or blame other people than to look inward. and recognize that we have a problem.

Taking time for self-observation and sincerely acknowledging that there is a problem is the beginning of being able to step up and end emotional dependency.

2. Don't be afraid of uncertainty

And it is that, many times, it is the fear of being alone that makes us return and return to that toxic relationship that causes us so much pain and suffering. When we feel that the future alone is uncertain, we prefer to stay there, in the place we already know. Therefore, it is necessary get out of the comfort zone and adopt a positive attitude towards change.

3. Learn to say "no"

Learning to be assertive is essential to enjoy the emotional balance necessary for greater well-being. Being assertive means saying what you think while respecting the other person with whom you interact. Namely, it's about respecting the other party, but it also means respecting yourself. Learning to say "no" is essential to regain emotional autonomy.

4. Work on yourself

The main problem with people who are emotionally dependent is that they are too aware of the other person and forget who they are. You must pursue your goals, have your hobbies, and work at grow every day a little like being humanor, in other words, self-actualization. To stop being an emotionally dependent person, one of the keys is to fight for your own Personal development.

5. Y... reinforce your self-esteem

Working on oneself is the first step to reinforce one's self-esteem, which, as has already been said, is one of the main causes why an individual finds himself in this situation. What's more, the longer you are in this toxic relationship, the more you suffer the consequences in terms of self-esteem.

That is why it is necessary to carry out strategies that help improve self-esteem. I recommend our article: "10 keys to increase your self-esteem in 30 days”To be able to work on the assessment you have of yourself.

6. Check your beliefs

Another of the main causes why someone can end up in a situation of dependency Emotional are the beliefs that one has about what love is and what a relationship should be like. partner.

To avoid this, it is necessary questioning your own beliefs and thinking critically about them. In the movies, love may seem very beautiful, but the reality is different. You do not have to force yourself to be in a relationship out of fear of being alone or because of the need to have a partner and get married.

You can enjoy great satisfaction and well-being being single. You can check it in this article: "Is it possible to be single and be happy? The 8 benefits of not having a partner.”

7. Connect with other people

It can also happen that the emotionally dependent person has a poor social life, few friends, or feels isolated. This causes a complicated situation, because the person has no one to talk to and explain what is happening to him. Also, have an active social life makes us enjoy much healthier relationships and we do not depend so much on a single person.

8. Be brave

To get out of this situation it is necessary to take responsibility, because you can choose between staying there and taking a step forward to end the problem. You have to be brave and not fear the future. For it, there is nothing like setting short-term goals and making them very clear from the beginning. Changes require a period of adjustment, and in time you won't regret making the decision to leave this toxic relationship behind.

9. Resist the urge to go back

Obviously, there will be easier times and more difficult times when you step up. But you should know that change is never easy and that there may be ups and downs along the way. Understanding this can make you aware that you must resist the temptation to go back.

10. Learn to love in a healthy way

To begin to heal our relationship we must love in a healthy way and leave behind many Limiting beliefs that we have incorporated and that prevent us from enjoying relationships in their fullness. As personal development experts say, this is a very heavy backpack. Going from emotional dependence to affective autonomy is one of the keys to achieving well-being as a couple, and for this, it is necessary to love in a mature way.

• Related article: "Goodbye emotional dependency; hello affective autonomy”

11. Avoid other people's expectations

Many emotionally dependent people are likely to have unrealistic and overly intense expectations about what to expect of others. This usually provokes an idealization towards the other party., and it is not a wise decision to fill the emptiness that we can feel with ourselves with the need to have someone by our side at all costs.

Living with this illusory image of another person can be dangerous, because even in the face of evidence that expectations we have are not true, these expectations can keep us clinging to something imaginary, to an unreal image of what the other is person. Realizing this can help you overcome emotional dependency.

12. Seek professional help

In some cases, these tips can help you overcome this situation and figure out what the problem is. Be aware that you are emotionally dependent, recognize that you are afraid of being alone and work to grow and develop yourself as a person, these are strategies that will help you improve your well-being and empower you in the face of life and uncertainty.

However, getting out of this dark place, the toxic relationship, is not always easy. The best way to do this is by seeking professional help.Since a psychologist can help you acquire tools to improve your self-esteem, your interpersonal skills and, therefore, your well-being.