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Everything there is to know about Sexual Fantasies

Fantasizing is not an activity exclusively for children and adults who look like children. Fortunately, it is a capacity that all human beings have and that we can use throughout our lives.

Sexual fantasies

Fantasizing is simple: roughly, you just have to let your imagination run. Thus, imagining other realities, we can live experiences of all kinds. Of course, in the mind.

On the sexual level, in a private and personal way, we may be able to let ourselves be carried away by our erotic thoughts and intertwine mind, body and emotions, being able to live tremendously pleasant experiences, and even trigger the sexual response.

You just have to find and press the fantasies ON button.

When do we start to fantasize? What do sexual fantasies feed on, and how do they evolve?

As explained by the sex therapist Wendy maltz of her in her book "The intimate world of female sexual fantasies", women begin to fantasize in childhood, with more romantic or sensual ideas, evolving over time to more sexual ideas.

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The development of fantasies seems to be closely related to sexual development, and in turn, to experiences that are being lived, the culture and the information that is collected regarding sexuality throughout the lifetime.

It is therefore important to fill the drawer of our fantasies with everything that stimulates us. You have to look for sources of inspiration, which place the senses of the person right in the exit box of the path of the erotic, always ready to seek pleasure.

Types of sexual fantasies

This question is complicated if one starts from the fact that in the mind anything goes: strictly speaking, there are fantasies of all kinds. The theme is as varied as how different the tastes of one and the other are. However, there is a classification that is interesting to mention, as it can provide a deeper understanding of one's sexuality.

As Maltz explains, sexual fantasies can be classified into fictionalized fantasies and non-fictionalized fantasies.

The fictionalized fantasies unfold like a true story, with characters and relationships between them. The roles of the protagonist, usually vary from dominance, where power and control are the elements characteristic, even a sweet and beautiful role of a loved one, where affection, intimacy or spiritual attraction, are the predominant. But there can also be victim roles, where fear or even violence make an appearance; of savage, understanding this as a free role, without power or control; object of desire, or simply, of voyeur.

On the other hand, there are the non-fictionalized fantasies. These fantasies are totally linked to the sensory capacities that humans have. They are not stories like the previous ones, but they are visual, auditory, tactile stimuli, etc. those that give us pleasure when imagining them in the mind.

What are your fantasies like? Do you make real movies in your head or are your senses taking you to paradises of pleasure?

In any case, whatever the type of fantasy, the most important thing is to give yourself permission to fantasize, free from guilt, censorship, shame or fearyou.

What meanings do sexual fantasies have?

The meaning of the fantasies has a relative importance, if we start from the idea that there is no bad sexual fantasy as long as it works. If the fantasy is capable of activating you, of suggesting you, of making you feel pleasure, that fantasy works. Use it a lot!

However, on certain occasions the fantasies can be a cause for concern or they can make it difficult to intimacy of the person, in which case they become disturbing or intrusive fantasies, or as she also calls them Wendy Maltz,cheating fantasies.

These types of fantasies can occur when the fantasy itself is in contradiction with the person's reality or when the fantasy makes lose the sense of control of the person who is experiencing it or they can also be those who maintain or reinforce negative behaviors or even dangerous.

In these cases, it is good and reassuring to know that fantasies can be shaped to suit the consumer. Therefore, you can discard that fantasy and look for another. Wendy Maltz conducts guided explorations of fantasies in workshops or in therapy and in her book explains how she carries them out, recounting some cases.

What are the advantages of sexual fantasies?

1. The mind is the most important engine of sexual arousal. Using the potential that gives us the ability to fantasize can help enrich and enjoy more of sexual life, since it acts directly in increasing sexual desire. By fantasizing, you can live experiences that you may not be able to or do not want to live in real life, but that when experienced in the mind, report enormous pleasure.

2. They are a source of improvement of the self-esteem Y of personal attractiveness. In general, fantasies allow you to focus on the finer details. sexy, being able to avoid external criticism and self-criticism.

3. They help to rehearse possible future practices or they can serve to preserve pleasant past memories or to overcome some limitations of the present.

4. Fantasies they are personal creations and as such, they can be modified as desired, adapting them to personal tastes and needs.

5. It is a simple, fun, creative technique that is available to everyone andIt's free! (Important detail in these times when everything seems to have a price).

6. The more you practice fantasizing, simpler is to unleash well-being, pleasure and even sexual response.

There are too many good things brought by this practice not to consider fantasizing.

Bibliographic references:

  • Maltz, W, and Boss, A. (1998). The intimate world of female sexual fantasies: a journey of passion, pleasure and self-discovery. Publisher: Paidós Iberíca.

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