How can we know when a relationship is healthy?

Relationships can go through many ups and downs, but that does not necessarily tell us if it is going well or not. Each relationship is unique and the tools available to them to deal with problems can be very varied.

Nevertheless, there are certain behaviors and attitudes that can tell us if a relationship is on the right track. These signs that a relationship is going well are sometimes subtle, while others are very obvious, such as that there is respect or that both of you get along with each other's family.

Next we are going to discover several of these signs, understanding what their importance is with respect to how healthy the relationship is.

• Related article: "How do you know when to go to couples therapy? 5 compelling reasons "

The 15 signs that a relationship is going well

Each couple is different and unique, as are the people who make them up, therefore, multiple variables will intervene, individual, social, cultural, family, etc., which will influence the dynamics that are established in the relationship, how we relate with the other.

However, we can affirm that there are a series of universal signals that tell us if the relationship is good road or, on the contrary, you have some problem that you should overcome if you intend to continue long term.

Naturally each couple goes through stages, but there are certain behaviors and attitudes within them that can tell us how healthy the relationship is. Next we are going to know in detail what are the 15 signs that our relationship is going well.

1. Mutual respect is practiced

Every healthy love relationship is based on mutual respect. If teasing behaviors, derogatory comments, manipulation, control of space and privacy, will indicate that the couple's relationship is not in equilibrium. In extreme cases in which there is no type of respect, we would find situations of physical and psychological abuse.

• You may be interested in: "The 9 types of abuse and their characteristics"

2. There is active listening

A fundamental aspect in any relationship is that there is good communication, and this is evidenced in the form of fruitful feedback. That is to say, our partner responds to what we say in the form of gestures of support and understanding, in addition to answering what we ask and shows emotional reactions according to what we are saying.

An example of not being in active listening, in tune, would be if our partner often starts looking at the mobile when we want to share experiences or have a conversation with her, since this will increase the disconnection between both of them.

• Related article: "Active listening: the key to communicate with others"

3. There is a strong complicity

Complicity is one of the best signs that a relationship is going well. In good relationships the point of knowledge about each other becomes so great that it is enough to a knowing look to know what our partner feels or thinks about a certain topic or situation.

But this does not happen by divination, thought reading or by magic, but because They have both allowed each other, throughout their relationship, to know and know how the couple feels, what are you thinking about, what worries you and what makes you happy. Because complicity implies a feeling of solidarity, loyalty and absolute trust with the person we love.

• You may be interested in: "The 4 types of love: what different kinds of love are there?"

4. The happiness of the other is lived as one's own

The happiness of the other person brings us joy, happiness and pleasure. Without forgetting ourselves, we enjoy and want our partner to be happy, since both your own well-being and that of the other are of vital importance. As long as that happiness and well-being is not at the cost of our state of health or happiness, it will be indicative that the The relationship is going from strength to strength, because we must not forget that a couple is a team and both have to feel and be in Balance.

• Related article: "The 7 myths of romantic love"

5. The transparency law applies

There is transparency in the relationship, that is, honesty defines the couple, to the point that both trust each other and this is evidenced in the decisions that are made. You are sincere with the other in what you say and do.

6. The own is shared

The concept of what is mine and what is yours fades in a healthy love relationship. It is not that private property is renounced, but that everyone's things are respected but that is not an impediment for them to be shared.

There is no suspicion or fear that one could break or misuse the other's things, and if it happened by accident nothing would happen either because it is known that there have been no bad intentions.

• You may be interested in: "The 13 rules of communication in the couple"

7. No secrets

In healthy, trust-based relationships there are no secrets. Both members of the couple know each other's low moments and their vulnerabilities. The recrimination is not present if not the support and respect for the times that the couple needs to be able to share difficult moments or situations who have or have lived.

8. Shared interests are cultivated

Good couples do their best to strengthen the interests that unite them. That is why a sign of a good relationship is that you dedicate time to the issues that unite them, such as a sport, going to the movies, listening to music, traveling ...

Whatever both members enjoy, working together and strengthening it shows an interest not only in keeping what brought them together, but in spending meaningful time together as well.

• Related article: "23 things to do as a couple (interesting and fun)"

9. You think long term

It is clear that a good relationship has plans for the future. Project for the long term It is a sign that this relationship has settled its hopes in continuing the relationship by planning a life together.

In tuned couples there is enthusiasm to establish, create projects together, and they do not get scared or evade the issues that have to do with what direction the relationship is going to continue in the distant future.

10. See the couple's family as one's own

Healthy couples try to treat their partner's family as their own. There is respect for the parents and siblings of others, and it is intended to establish a bond with them of unity, acceptance, harmony and tolerance.

In couples in which there are tensions with the in-laws, although this is not an indication that this relationship is toxic, but it is observed that these disagreements generate conflicts and disconnections within the relationship.

11. It is in the good and in the not so good

Couples who are on the right track are not only together in good situations, but also in bad times. The relationship it is good if the other is not abandoned when he feels bad or has a serious problem.

In fact, a sign that the relationship is promising is that both in the tough and in the mature ones you give support to the other.

• You may be interested in: "How to give emotional support, in 6 steps"

12. Different views are accepted

No matter how even it is, it is inevitable that everyone has their own point of view of it and there are points in which they disagree. That is not a bad thing, in fact, it is a sign that the relationship is healthy because despite continuing to date someone, individuality has not been lost.

Now, it is also healthy to respect the points of view of the other, treating them with delicacy without resorting to personal attack or undermining the opinion of the other. There is mutual respect, accepting that you cannot agree on absolutely everything.

• Related article: "How to give constructive criticism: 11 simple and effective tips"

13. One rejoices in the successes of the other

The other person's achievements are lived and celebrated as their own. There are no personal successes, but now it belongs to both and joy floods both lovers equally intensely when one of them achieves something that he had longed for so much.

14. Decisions are discussed before they are made

The couple is conceived as an environment for dialogue, in which one cannot do what he wants at the expense of the other or without consulting him.

Naturally, there are small aspects of the relationship that the other person does not need to be aware of, but others do need to be discussed before making a decision. A sign that the relationship is not going well is when one makes decisions without consulting the other, imposing it and hoping that the other ends up accepting because it has already been decided that way and there is only talk.

• Related article: "How to learn to listen in a conversation in 5 steps"

15. Own mistakes are acknowledged

It is desired and is seen as an ideal that within the relationship there are no discussions, but it would be living a utopia because conflicts in relationships are inevitable. Both members of the couple are different, they make mistakes and sometimes they also argue, but it is totally normal to disagree on one aspect and for it to end in an argument.

Naturally, this is not a good sign that the relationship is going well, but rather what comes next. If after discussing the member of the couple who has made the mistake (or both) recognize it, we are facing a sign that the relationship is mature and healthy.

Trying to reach an agreement after the conflict is also a sign that they care about each other, that they do not want there to be winners and losers in this discussion, but both are comfortable and come to a new situation in which there are concessions and efforts to parties equal.