How to manage emotions? 3 key steps based on neuroscience

Let me tell you a secret. We cannot control our emotions, nor dominate them. Of course, we can learn to manage them in a healthy way.

Therefore, in this article I share with you 3 keys to healthy and effective emotional management, based on neuroscience trials.

• Related article: "The 8 types of emotions (classification and description)"

What is the use of learning to manage emotions?

Knowing how to manage emotions brings multiple benefits to the person:

• Create and maintain interpersonal relationships of trust and appreciation.
• Express oneself clearly and forcefully.
• Being able to function with ease in pressure situations.
• Maintain mental clarity in times of change and difficulty.

Keys to effective emotion management

The steps that I am going to share with you are part of the University of Massachusetts Stress Reduction and Emotional Management with Mindfulness program (MBSR in English). They are not complex. But they do require training to be effective.

1. identify the emotion

The first step is to identify the emotion that one is experiencing.

Every emotion has its somatic expression. Changes in breathing, heart rate, muscle tension associated with each emotion occur in milliseconds. The first signs are subtle, barely noticeable, but they grow quickly.

If we are able to perceive these signals at the beginning, we have half the job done. The problem is that, as a general rule, we are aware of the emotion when it is already very advanced. So it is very difficult to manage.

In the brain there is an area that could help us with that task. The insula it is the area of ​​self-awareness in the brain. Insula receives and sends signals to the heart, lungs, colon, stomach, intestines, sexual organs, liver. If there is fear and you realize how fast the heart beats, it is thanks to the insula. Activation in that area is associated not only with physical sensations, but also with emotional self-awareness.

The training in Mindfulness helps improve the connectivity and strength of the insula. And in turn, it helps to detect emotional states with greater fluidity.

• You may be interested: "What is emotional intelligence?"

2. name the emotion

The second step would be to name the emotion, even mentally. Acknowledging one's state and putting it into words reduces distressing emotions. According to tests carried out, this simple trick (affect labelling, in English) is capable of changing the activity in the amygdala (the area of ​​the brain responsible for emotional display), decreasing reactivity emotional.

This process is possible thanks to the intervention of the prefrontal cortex. For that to happen, it is important to have good connectivity between that area and the amygdala.

Mindfulness training has been shown to be effective in improving the connection between the amygdala and the prefrontal cortex within the MBSR mindfulness program. Furthermore, Mindfulness skill is directly associated with better emotional regulation performed by the prefrontal cortex through the “affect labeling” technique.

3. regulate emotion

The third step would be to regulate the emotion. According to neuroanatomy doctor Jill Bolte Taylor's 90-second rule, it only takes 90 seconds to identify the emotion and let it pass. If after that time, we continue to experience the emotion, it is because we are feeding it with our thoughts and interpretations..

The emotion is born in the body and has to be lived in the body until its end. The process of emotion regulation is not a mental process, but rather an experiential and somatic one. In this process, attention is focused on the somatic manifestations of emotion with a series of qualities of full attention, or mindfulness: openness, kindness, non-judgment, acceptance and curiosity. The sensation is perceived as it is. At no point is there any intention to change the emotion or make it different.

Learning to manage emotions is a skill that can bring multiple benefits to anyone's life. It is a gradual and experiential process. in our center Mindfulme in Barcelona, ​​we explore in a more complete way the process of emotional regulation within the MBSR program that we facilitate, and thus We recommend learning little by little, starting with less intense events and stimuli and with the support of the facilitator. experienced.