Why getting over the death of a dog is so complicated

It may be difficult for those who have never had a pet to understand, but the death of a dog can affect more than that of a person with whom one had a close and practically daily relationship, or at least comparable to the pain that this type of mourning entails.

Why is this happening? After all, from an evolutionary perspective it doesn't make much sense: we spend time and effort maintaining a bond affective with a species that is not ours and, when the animal dies, we also sacrifice part of our well-being to mourn its death.

Perhaps this question is misplaced. Having a friendship with a dog does not mean following a cost-benefit strategy in which we take care of the animal to obtain a product in return. That is, perhaps, what would happen if a dog were just that, a dog. But it is not like that: our companion is much more than a pet.

What makes dogs special

There is something that distinguishes dogs from other animals that have traditionally been cared for and domesticated by humans: they have had a long time to evolve. In almost every way,

the domestic dog has gradually become the perfect companion, an animal that, despite not having the ability to think abstractly that we have, is capable of changing its behavior in the face of death or the prolonged absence of its faithful friend.

How to forget, for example, the case of Hachikō, the Akita breed dog who spent the last 9 years of his life staying at the train station for which his master left, never to return due to his death.

What makes this animal unique, and what makes its loss so painful, is that it spontaneously bonds with other species without the need for special training. In fact, it has been proven that the simple fact of looking into the eyes of a dog for long periods of time causes your brain to start behaving just like the human being who keeps staring into your eyes does: the oxytocin, the love hormone, begins to be produced in large quantities, and both the human being and the dog coordinate this cycle of hormones.

• Related article: "Can love exist between species? Research supports "yes""

The evolution of human's best friend

Some biologists and anthropologists, such as Brian Hare, believe that the domestic dog has evolved from the wolf species to survive alongside our species, leaving behind its aggressiveness and character territorial.

The gregarious character of the wolf has been preserved, but throughout the 10,000 years of history that have passed since the first domestication of the dog, these animals have started to develop other psychological characteristics that have brought them closer to us: they have become more curious than reserved, more playful than hostile, more tolerant of change and therefore much more likely to learn new things from others another species.

Somehow, a human characteristic, the possibility of creating societies and transforming the environment, has served to modify the DNA from a part of the wolf population causing these animals to find a place first in the tribes and then in the civilization.

the duel for pets

Knowing all of the above allows us to better understand why the death of a dog affects us so much. basically because because of his spontaneous character and his ignorance of the sophisticated social norms, buts have become the perfect friends and companions.

They are neither individualistic enough not to react in any way to human presence or even avoid it, nor human enough to worry about your social image, fall into prejudices or stereotypes or to manipulate trying to win someone's friendship in exchange for a long-term goal term.

When a dog dies, we are losing a being that offered us company totally based on the here and now, in small moments, and who appreciates all forms of spontaneity without worrying about what others are going to do think. In many ways, dogs allow us to befriend someone without having to give up who we are in our private life.

Many other people probably do not understand that the bereavement for pets it is especially harsh in cases where a dog has died, and in some cases they may secretly think we are being theatrical. However, it is worth knowing that feeling deep emotional pain is completely normal and legitimate in such cases, and that no one and nothing has the right to question the authenticity of the moment.