My son or daughter has an eating disorder: what to do?

An eating disorder or eating disorder is a persistent pattern related to unhealthy eating behavior. These patterns are associated with emotional, social, and physical discomfort.

EDs occur regardless of the gender, race or age of the person who suffers from it, although there are more vulnerable groups such as occurs in adolescence. In this article we will focus on the behaviors that we, as family, friends and acquaintances, we can control in the prevention of an eating disorder in the vulnerable person of our environment.

• Related article: "Anorexia nervosa: symptoms, causes and treatment"

Risk behaviors

It is necessary to take into account certain behaviors that, unconsciously and without malicious intent, we can have as family members and that help people at risk of suffering an eating disorder to develop it. These behaviors are especially negative from 5-6 years of age, and may be:

1. Jokes, mockery or disapproval about the child's body or way of eating

This may seem innocent, but can help start or aggravate body dissatisfaction

, causing the person to start not being comfortable with her body. This is especially important at ages in which the self-esteem and that the supporting figures are an almost indisputable reference.

2. The presence of fathers or mothers who are very concerned about their figure

That is to say, fathers or mothers following restrictive diets to control weight (without medical justifications to do so). This is because minors learn, among other ways, by looking at how others act. That is, they have models to follow and imitate. If the closest attachment figures go on diets to lose weight and it is synonymous with beauty and approval, why would it be any different with them?

• You may be interested in: "Eating disorders: how they affect the way we see ourselves"

General guidelines to carry out in the family environment

If we already find that we have a family member with ED at home, the best thing we can do is collect some guidelines to better manage this situation and reduce or not aggravate it:

• Learn and establish healthy eating habits.
• Eating meals accompanied by family or friends or at least one family meal a day (prioritizing communication and family time).
• Do physical exercise regularly and appropriate for age and physical condition.
• Facilitate communication between family members, empathizing with the person suffering from ED.
• Avoid insistent conversations about food and body image.
• Do not make jokes and disapproval about the body, its shape, the weight.
• Do not criticize the way you eat, for example.
• Value positive aspects such as personal development and not perfection as an objective.
• Help build the self-esteem of children and adolescents, for example, by making them see their achievements more than their failures.
• Do not allow the person with ED to enter the kitchen and keep the door closed.
• Do not allow the person with ED to handle food.
• Do not allow the person with ED to change the agreed menu items, especially when a nutritionist intervenes.
• Adjust meal time to 45 minutes.
• Do not leave food on the plate if it is an adequate amount and it is regulated by a professional.
• Rest after meals.
• Do not allow the person with ED to go to the supermarket, pastry shops, etc.
• Do not leave the person with ED alone at home.
• Do not allow the person with ED to go to the bathroom after eating to prevent them from vomiting what they have ingested.
• Go to both mental health professionals and medical specialists in this type of disorder.

Looking for psychotherapeutic assistance?

Doing psychological therapy In conjunction with physical health check-ups, the person with ED can restore their quality of life.

Despite these guidelines, each person is different and not everything will work the same, it will depend on the circumstances that surround us. Therefore, if you need help to understand or learn to manage eating disorders in a family member, in PsychoAlmería we can help you.

We have health psychologists with experience in the psychological approach to eating disorders.