Psychological help in processes of infertility or assisted reproduction

Infertility, in all its variables, is an increasingly widespread problem, mainly due to the increase in the age at which we consider becoming parents, although it may be due to multiple factors and, on many occasions, there is not even an explanation as to why the long-awaited child does not arrive.

For whatever reason, what is evident is that it causes psychological stress. It is a situation that is beyond people's control and is not talked about much, so they are often overwhelmed and have few tools to manage it.

The process towards assisted reproduction

The process usually begins when the couple decides to have a child and begins to discover that it takes longer than expected, this generates a anxiety level variable, which depends on the person, on the time it is taking, on whether or not the causes of this delay, if you know whether or not you can have children, if there have been abortions previous, etc. That is, it depends on multiple factors, both personal and contextual.

Besides, the couple is usually in the position of starting or not a process of assisted reproduction

. The decision making itself is usually already complex and if it is decided that it is, or even if it is done in this way by medical prescription, there is You also have to be psychologically prepared and a psychological accompaniment is recommended since it is not an easy process at the level emotional. It is necessary to work, among other aspects, the expectations that are had of the treatment (trying to achieve a balance between realism and positivity), tolerance for frustration, uncertainty, fear, anxiety, waiting management etc

Managing stress and anxiety

Of course, if the result is not as desired, more intensive support is required and work with the person or else on the path of persistence and stress management and the pain that this produces, or accompany the couple who decide to abandon the treatment in the feeling of guilt, failure, sadness, etc. that this decision can generate for them, but that it is a logical decision and very staff.

The decisions, as always in therapy, are made by the patients, although it is true that the psychologist must ensure that these decisions are not are taken under the influence of emotional states that prevent being rational, for example, if the couple/person decides not to continue with the treatment when you have just learned that the result has been negative, you may do it guided by the frustration of the moment, which is not what suitable.

It is of vital importance that the person/couple does not lose functionality, that is, work must be done so that they continue to do the same or very similar activities being able to enjoy them and not generate an obsession that can even become pathological and harm the couple. It is very common that these processes can harm the dynamics of the couple, that they only talk about this topic, that there increased irascibility, that they do not feel like doing other things, that sexual relations revolve around the conception etc Thus, With the help of a psychologist, work is done to prevent this from happening or to try to remedy or alleviate it. if it is already happening.

How can psychological therapy help us?

Waiting, together with the feeling of lack of control, is one of the aspects that disturbs the person the most. When a child is not arriving, whether or not the couple puts themselves in the hands of assisted reproduction, we must assume that we do not have the solution in our hands, that there are many elements that are beyond our control, what's more, as we have commented, sometimes we don't even know why it doesn't arrive, so this feeling creates a lot of insecurity to which is added anxiety about the wait.

Another aspect that usually generates a lot of pain is when the person/couple discovers that they cannot be biological parents and wanted to be. Obviously, this generates suffering, anxiety and even depression. At this point, therapy must focus on pain management, expression of feelings, on providing tools to channel anger., guilt, sadness, etc., expanding objectives, assessing options... according to the situation and the demand of the person/couple and the point where they are.

In short, we have spoken with generalizations of processes that are very personal and different from each other, however, they usually share that they are experienced as stressful, that they have a lot of emotional charge and that it is very important that a psychologist accompany the couple or the person involved to help them manage everything that is happening, also, although social support is very important, the people around us do not usually know how to help us, so what in Mariva Psychologists We recommend, without a doubt, putting yourself in the hands of a psychologist who can help you.