Stubborn people: 5 typical characteristics, and how to deal with them

There is no single way to interpret what life is, what it implies for us. One of the consequences of this is that each person develops a more positive or negative way of seeing things, and a more flexible or rigid mindset.

And it is that a large part of our identity is given by the way in which we learn to adapt to what is happening to us, to our environment. Some people tend to constantly change strategy depending on the results that their plans give when they are applied to reality, and there are those who, no matter what, continue to maintain the same beliefs, opinions and attitudes.

In this article we will see exactly what does it mean to be a stubborn person, and what are the characteristics of this way of being.

• Related article: "What is an obsession? Causes, symptoms and treatment"

5 characteristics of stubborn people

Stubbornness can be more or less positive depending on the context, but in general, it means a limitation that leads us to not want to part with an idea or strategy no matter what. Let's see how this translates into practice.

1. they are proud

Stubborn people are not stubborn simply because they honestly believe that the right thing to do is to continue to behave as they do. They are, in part, because the fact of taking a sharp turn in their attitudes, opinions, strategies or style of behavior can wear down their image, revealing that a mistake has been made or that they are simply imperfect people who do not know in advance what is going to happen.

Thus, for them, the content of what they do, think or say is not as important as the idea of ​​being consistent in what they do.

2. Improvisation is your enemy

As with all of us, stubborn people are forced to improvise from time to time. What happens is that in their case there is an added risk of things going wrong, because if the initial decision they make turns out to be the wrong one, it is more difficult for them to correct themselves.

This is something that they themselves know, and as a consequence, based on what they are learning from their experiences, they prefer to avoid exposing themselves to situations in which they have to make important decisions in an impromptu.

3. Theory matters more to them than reality

For this type of person, on many occasions, if the theory does not correspond to reality, it is reality that is wrong. This does not mean that they have a strong desire to improve the world, since to do the latter it would be necessary to carry out a reliable diagnosis of the problem on which they are going to intervene. It means that they prefer to hide behind that mental rigidity as long as they don't face the fact that their ideas may be wrong.

4. They are interested in being seen as autonomous people

As we have seen, stubborn people want to offer an image of coherence and of having their own very reliable criteria. So while not all of them want to lead teams, they tend to enjoy the possibility of be seen as intellectual referents, people with a philosophy of life to take into account.

5. They have dichotomous approaches

When clinging to a belief, stubborn people need to have a justification for not taking into account all the opinions against what they do. For this reason, they often create "black lists" that lead them to dismiss the ideas of others. Everything that does not agree with them in that sense, is outside of any self-critical consideration or reflection. In this way doubts disappear.

What to do when dealing with them?

When dealing with stubborn people, follow these tips.

1. Don't laugh at their mistakes

This is important, because it supposes a clear confrontation. Sometimes, stubbornness can lead us to develop attitudes or behaviors that seem like a cartoon, but that is not a reason to laugh at those who maintain them. Doing so will only create discomfort and will not make them get out of their mistake, due to the cognitive dissonance generated: they prefer to believe that the other does not know what he says to assume his mistakes.

• You may be interested in: "Cognitive dissonance: the theory that explains self-deception"

2. Enter the doubt

We have also seen that stubborn people are very radical in their way of thinking, and tend to see as something negative everything that goes against the belief or strategy that they maintain, no matter what happens. That means directly attacking that belief or idea will not be effective.

However, what is useful is to make the stubborn person start to doubt them, drawing conclusions about what happens when they take those ideas to their ultimate consequences.

3. Offer a dignified outlet

It is not necessary to make it clear that what was stubbornly defended was absurd. Who has clung to a belief or attitude in a radical way, it will hardly do that in the short term. It's enough to ignore what happened and give the other person a chance to stop blindly defending you without eliciting laughter or critical comments.