Empathic communication: what it is and how it can improve your life

Most of the problems in the world that you may have in relation to your development as a person (or professional) usually have the same origin: a communication problem.

We live with too many difficulties to connect with others, be it our partner, children, friends, clients, co-workers... Communication is a key skill to connect with the other, but at the same time it is the one that we neglect the most. And in this area, highlights the importance of empathic communication. In this article we will see why this is key.

• Related article: "The importance of expressing emotions, in 7 keys"

Problems connecting with others

Why is it so difficult to connect with others and there is always confusion and conflict due to communication? Because each human being interprets what happens to him in a certain way and according to his own filters, belief system and experiences.

All your experiences and the way you manage and understand your emotions (your fears, insecurities, guilt, yearnings, etc.) has made you see life in a concrete way, and that influences your communication. When trying to connect with another person,

each one can give a very different meaning to what we say, in such a way that it is very difficult for us to connect.

What do all these problems lead to? On the personal level, it leads us to feel isolated, to live with constant arguments (This is common if the communication problems occur in the couple), not being able to express ourselves, having a lot of difficulty saying no and establishing our limits, etc. These problems escalate like a snowball going downhill.

In the professional field, which is no less important, organizational problems, low productivity and conflicts arise, due to a not very transparent communication that conceals certain conflicts that must be faced and resolved. In turn, if you want to start or work with clients or with a group that you need to influence positively (students, work team, etc.), that your communication is positive, excites and connects It's basic.

For 10 years I have accompanied people as a psychologist and coach in profound change processes to achieve overcome their problems and live with another approach to life that is more positive and allows them to achieve new objectives. The surprising thing that I did not know when I started doing it, is that communication was so important. In almost 100% of the cases, I found that always it is necessary to work with the communication of the person to achieve real changes in his life (personal, professional, couple, etc.). In fact, if you visit Empoderamientohumano.com, the online personal development school where I can accompany you, you will see several processes to develop your empathic communication.

What is empathic communication?

So the apparent problem is actually the great solution... develop your empathic communication. This is the ability to communicate in such a way that you connect with the other's way of communicating, which generates empathy, trust and allows you to express yourself, understand and create deeper and more powerful personal ties.

It is, on the other hand, a skill that has several key characteristics:

1. Active listening

It is about listening to the other in such a way that you do not judge or interpret or valueInstead, you really understand his point of view and respect it as his personal vision (which you don't intend to change or fight against). The opposite is making value judgments, and this is one of our most common communication problems. This, which can be so simple, is what is most difficult for us.

2. Adapt to the other's system

Sometimes to win you have to give in. In fact, if you give in, you defeat yourself and the ego that does not allow you to connect with the other. If you adapt your communication system to the other (depending on their point of view), you generate much more empathy. This is done through respect, using similar ways of speaking, paraphrasing, and with other techniques that you can develop through an action plan and expert professional company.

3. Opening

In other words... it's about not wanting to be right. Wanting to be right (even when you think you are) is just ego, pride, and it doesn't allow you to connect.

You may think, "If I give in on everything, they will dominate me." But that is also fear and pride. With empathic communication you are not dominated, but you understand, connect and can resolve conflicts and move forward.

Advantage

The advantages of empathic communication are not only in resolving conflicts, but there are many more:

1. Allows you to live the life you want

Your way of communicating it is a reflection of your way of thinking and seeing life. If the messages you give yourself change, that focus, your actions and the life you want will also change.

2. It will improve your personal relationships

Both with friends, partner, coworkers, partners, clients or children.

3. You will save a lot of stress

The vast majority of the stress we feel in our day-to-day lives comes from not being able to understand or make us understand.

4. It will help you in your personal or professional development, in any field

If you develop this important skill, you will already have a pillar of personal development by your side.

Developing your empathic communication is not something you can achieve in a couple of days, but in a few months if you have the right company. I recommend you visit Empoderamientohumano.com to take the first steps (if you want, you can ask me for a private session, tell me your situation and I will help you make the first progress).

Bibliographic references:

• Goleman, D. (1996). The roots of empathy. In D. Goleman (Ed.), Emotional intelligence. Barcelona: Cairos.