Nerves and stress: what is anxiety for?

Don't lose your temper!

Popularly, there is the conviction that "nerves" are like little devils that when fed too much make our life hell. In fact, in popular language the message of "not losing your temper" is transmitted, which comes to mean "calm down, don't get upset." And it is that this advice would be very successful if not for the fateful interpretation that is given.

Really, if we were to take "keep it cool" just as what it really means, and not as a gruesome interpretation of what will happen if we lose them (if we are not calm), there would be far fewer anxiety problems and of course, that even more popular goal of "being happy" would be closer.

What are nerves?

Beyond philosophical or linguistic analysis, it is important that we have a clear idea of ​​what those “nerves” are that are talked about so often, and especially about how nerves influence our daily functioning. Therefore, we are going to treat them under the term activation.

First, you have to attack that negative connotation

. These nerves refer to the level of mental, physiological and emotional activation, which translates into specific behaviors that act trying to moderate that level, always depending on the task in concrete.

This concept has in clinical psychology a lot of relationship with the anxiety, the stress or the afraid. A basic characteristic of anxiety is the high activation, both physiological and emotional, that the person experiences. Thus, we see how the three terms (anxiety, stress or fear) are nothing more than different representations of a high activation.

The types of nerves

This is an important point. It is not the same for us to argue with our partner as the nerves we feel when taking an exam, nor respond to a scare than to run away from a mad dog. That is why we say that it is the task that determines what type of activation and what level of it we must have. In reference to the types of activation, we must know that our "nerves" act based on two mechanisms.

• One appetitive or approximation, which is activated in relation to positive emotions and behaviors that we like (such as that excitement we feel when we are going to score a goal, or when we try to achieve a goal professional).

• One of defense or avoidance, related to threats or situations that we dislike (examples would be behavior of flight or survival of a threat; fleeing a danger, fighting a threat ...).

Is it good to be very activated?

Of course, it can be. This activation, as we mentioned, is useful or necessary depending on the task. Returning to the examples from before, a much higher activation is useful if we need to escape a threat than if we try to pass an exam. Moreover, the very existence of this activation is necessary in order to face daily challenges. It is not necessarily bad. Unless we decide ourselves.

In the same way, as for that positive activation, there will also be a differential need for it when it comes to improving the time it takes to run a kilometer, than for receive a kiss (remember that positive activation not only implies positive emotions, but behaviors that help us or bring us closer to that source of activation, as in the case of goal).

Reinterpreting anxiety to live better

What is the real problem? Namely, Why is the message of not losing your temper, of not having a high activation, continue to be given? Obviously there are certain situations where high arousal is not helpful, but what if it is? It is not necessary to fear the adrenaline rush of the body, much less the consequences; no one has turned into a green muscular monster yet.

Clinically, here is a major problem: the subjective evaluation we make of our activation and the consequences it will have. It has been shown that the most disabling component of anxiety is not the physiological or physical, but the mental.

Relax. exist techniques to regulate that activation, called, worth the redundancy, deactivation techniques, among which are muscle relaxation, meditation or relaxation in imagination. And they can be used when that activation becomes unnecessary.

But before we get to it, let's relativize. Nothing happens to lose your nerves, and less if they are positive nerves. Let's give that positive excitement a chance. Let's give our body a chance to express itself as well. Maybe you want to tell us something.