Online couples therapy in times of confinement

At the moment in which we find ourselves due to the coronavirus pandemic, psychologists do not want to leave us alone; My psychotherapy clinic does not close, and is at your entire disposal for whatever you need; We are working online and you can ask us at any time.

Working online is very beneficial for our patients, because we do therapy from home, comfortably and informally; In addition, in the case of couples therapy, the good thing is that since both members of the couple are at home all day (or much of the day if one of them has to go out to work), it is very easy for us to make appointments for both patients and ourselves, the professionals, and have a relaxed session time without rush.

For all these reasons, I would like to emphasize that now is a very good time to do couples therapy online. Online work is just as effective as face-to-face work and therefore, if you need it, it is very convenient that you continue with the routines and therapies necessary for your well-being without letting the impossibility of going out on the street be an obstacle to this.

• Related article: "The 5 types of couples therapy"

Couple and confinement

In the situation we live in these days, it is completely normal for conflicts to arise in couples, since we are living much longer, with new routines and within a context of a state of alarm. It is normal to face this type of conflict, and if we do not drag a previous crisis, we will be able to successfully overcome all frictions or discussions that may arise.

Another different thing is that we are going through a delicate moment in our relationship as a couple. It is here when confinement is an unfavorable scenario for couples who were already dragging some kind of crisis or a previous unstable situation. Confinement can enhance this type of crisis and lead us to a very delicate and unstable situation, which will be greatly aggravated by the fact of having to continue living together imperatively.

For this reason, I would like to tell you that if you are in this type of situation, you think it is the ideal time to do couples therapy online. We always have to see the positive side. As I have mentioned before, it is an advantage to have more time, to be able to do it from home, and also to be more willing to put the exercises into practice in the time between sessions with me.

One thing I want to emphasize is the fact that in China there is a very notable increase in divorces as a result of confinement. As happens after the summer or Christmas holidays, in our country there is also an increase in divorces after having lived together for several weeks more intensively.

The same thing can happen in Spain, that is, after confinement, there is an increase in the number of divorces, but I would like to emphasize that the separations are not produced by the mere fact of confinement or an excess of coexistence, but are a consequence of crises that have dragged on over time, of relationships that were already bad before, and that explode or worsen during the lockdown.

That is why it is very important to detect if there are problems in your relationship, if there is a crisis in the love bond, and thus know that we are willing to move forward with the relationship. Confinement can definitely break our relationship, but if we do online couples therapy it is possible that not only is the crisis overcome, but also that the relationship.

Online couples therapy method

I will explain how we do online couples therapy. First of all, you have to know that therapy is performed with both members of the couple, either separately or at the same time. We use the Skype program, and we must have an Internet connection:

1. Cross interviews

What I usually do at the beginning are crossover interviews, one with one person and one with the other person, lasting around 15 minutes each. What is intended is to cross data and see that the initial problem is really clear.

2. Session together

Then we have a joint session in which I give objectives, how many sessions we are going to do, what points we are going to work on, etc.

3. Tasks between sessions

Taking into account the current situation and the availability of each one, I'm giving tasks to do between sessions in order to put into practice all the aspects that arise in the sessions focused on reinforcing the weaknesses of the relationship.

4. Track progress

In most cases, with an average of between 8 and 10 sessions, the problem is solved.

5. The importance of commitment to therapy

A very important aspect before facing therapy is that the people I am going to work with are fully motivated and give 100% to solve the problem. If for whatever reason, I detect that it is not your case, or it is not your moment, do not worry, we will not start therapy, we will wait or look for other ways.

To know more...

You can watch this video, in which I explain in more detail the working method of couples therapy. As a psychologist, I specialize in couples therapy work and therapy with women who are emotionally dependent or have low levels of self-esteem.

Remember that in the coronavirus crisis we do not leave you alone, We continue with Skype sessions, which are just as effective as in-person mode. We are also doing direct on Instagram every Tuesday at 7pm. Contact us for any questions or queries through the contact details of this page. You can also see more tips on this and other topics on my Instagram, and on my YouTube channel.