The 10 characteristics of couple relationships that annul us

Fortunately, today society is increasingly aware of the dangers of toxic relationships, that is, those in which the action of one of the members of the couple aims to annul the other person.

However, we must not forget that people involved in a love relationship lose a good part of their ability to analyze their situation in a objective, so it is common for people who suffer discomfort from their courtship or marriage to resist recognizing this relational dynamic problematic. And in situations like this, help is needed to understand and manage the problems arising from these kinds of links.

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How are couple relationships that can annul us?

Professionals of psychology and human behavior take into account a series of elements characteristic that, used by one of the members of the couple, can cancel out the other part.

Below you will find a list of the most important characteristics that can annul one of the members of the couple.

1. Jealousy

Jealousy in the couple is one of the main sources of discomfort that can annul one of the members of the same or both.

Although on some occasions they are usually a common response in some couples, the truth is that jealousy, when are recurrent and very intense, they may indicate that we are facing a problem that can lead to situations of abuse

It is important to remember that excessive jealousy in a person is not so much related to love but rather to the need to control to the other person and that can be the origin of a toxic relationship.

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2. Excessive control

Most abusive relationships are also based on control and submission towards the other person, a way to nullify her as an individual, lower her self-esteem and turn her into a slave.

Some of the forms of control can be imposing strict arrival times at home, prohibiting meeting with friends or family, giving an opinion constantly about the other's appearance or clothing and also prohibiting the other person from wearing certain clothes or doing certain activities.

Although it does not go to the extreme of abuse, some relationships are based on a subtle control of one of the parties towards the other person. In those cases it is also important prevent the other member of the couple from controlling us or preventing us from carrying out any activity in daily life; and if necessary, seek help and sever the relationship immediately.

The way to avoid excessive control of the couple towards oneself is to establish limits and spaces where the other person does not have the right to have an opinion or to control our will.

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3. Impositions

Another element closely related to control in the couple are the impositions: imposition of their future plans, personal tastes, etc.

Again, it is necessary to claim your own rights and prevent the other person from imposing nothing outside our will, establishing clear personal limits that should not be overrun.

For a relationship to function properly, agreements or common points must be reached through consensus and never imposing anything on the other person.

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4. Lack of respect

Disrespect is another of the classic ways of annulling the other member of the couple, and its constant presence can be the definitive sign that we are facing a toxic relationship or directly based on abuse.

Disrespect can be subtle or very obvious, and can occur both in public and in private; In either case, these are intended to humiliate the other person or subject them to the will of the couple.

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5. Relationship based on fear of rejection

Inspiring fear of abandonment or rejection is also a mechanism to annul the other member of the couple, and it is one of the most common forms of abuse that exist.

One of the ways in which fear can be presented as a relationship mechanism can be when one of the members has fear of expressing their opinion on something for fear that the other person will get angry.

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6. Unequal distribution of work

As in any other type of relationship, couple relationships must be based on equality of both rights and obligations.

An unequal distribution of household chores can be a sign of mistreatment or disregard for the other person and is also an effective way of overriding or humiliating her will.

Sharing common chores, either around the house or with your children, is a sign of respect and consideration. towards the other person and a good way to get deeply involved to ensure the good future of the relationship.

7. Lack of empathy

Empathy is the ability to put yourself in the place of the other, and it is an essential quality for the functioning of a couple relationship, as well as any other social interaction.

In this regard, it is important not only to be aware of the other person's feelings but also to react accordingly and with quickly to help in any way possible whenever our partner may be going through a period of discomfort or has had a difficult day.

• Related article: "Empathy, much more than putting yourself in someone else's shoes"

8. Lack of recognition of merits

Like disrespect, indifference to your feelings or the person's achievements it is also a way to undermine your self-esteem and create a state of discomfort.

Being aware of our partner's needs for affection or recognition and being attentive at all times about their achievements is a way of showing affection and dedication.

9. Emotional blackmail

Emotional blackmail is a very common form of manipulation in some couples and that some people put into practice with the aim of getting something in return.

This practice can end up annulling the person who is the victim of blackmail making you feel entirely responsible for the welfare of the other.

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10. Constant criticism

Some people, both men and women, have tendency to constantly criticize their partners in everything they do or say, and often this form of relationship becomes an increasingly common mechanism as the relationship progresses.

Having a partner who regularly criticizes any aspect of our person ends up being very negative on a psychological level and is a very effective cancellation mechanism.