What's behind a tantrum?
You may feel upset and helpless when the tantrum doesn't end and you don't know what to do with these behaviors of the little ones.
It may be that when this happens you try to solve it in a hurry and use different strategies that sometimes help you and that at other times make the situation worse.
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Childhood tantrums can become a problem
when the children are young they do not know how to regulate their emotions properly, they lose control over themselves, they find it hard to think before acting, they it is difficult to foresee the consequences of their behavior, and it is difficult for them to act according to the rules social.
Young children, when frustrated, often throw things, get angry about things they are not allowed to, or try of manipulating situations that do not allow them to get what they want, and this frustration is due to the desire to be more independent.
Why do children throw tantrums constantly? Children throw tantrums with people they feel safe with, with their
attachment figuresThat's why they don't throw tantrums with strangers.- You may be interested: "The 6 stages of childhood (physical and mental development)"
Does the child want to disobey?
Sometimes people believe that the child throws a tantrum because he wants to see us angry. But actually the child feels helpless and does not know how to regulate their emotions.
Parents or attachment figures seek strategies to modify their behavior, isolating or ignoring it, sending him time and away, threatening him, criticizing him, punishing him for his emotional state that causes discomfort... And they don't realize the feelings behind a tantrum. The punishment, the threat usually increases that the presence of these remains. It is very difficult for the child to understand something in the face of such an emotional explosion.
Yelling at him may calm him down and have an immediate effect; the child will not understand how to express what he feels and will not develop autonomy or responsibilityAnd this is likely to happen again.
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How to prevent tantrums?
These are some prevention measures that you can apply to parenting.
- Promote Healthy habits sleep and food
- Develop play activities and avoid places where the child cannot play.
- Set reasonable limits.
- Do not bring toys that are not at their age level.
- Promote independence, let him dress, just supervise.
- Let him make simple reasonable decisions that won't cause inconvenience instead of always saying no. Try to give him alternatives.
- Reconcile and negotiate.
- Above all, be an example to your child, avoid yelling or arguing in front of him.
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Recommendations before a tantrum
For better manage childhood tantrumsKeep these tips in mind.
- Be patient, stay calm (if you get visibly angry their reactions may worsen).
- Focus your attention on something other than the tantrum as soon as it starts.
- Help him to recognize his feelings, make him identify how he feels, describe in a calm and simple way what is happening to him; this way you will help him to decipher and recognize what he feels and why he feels it. You will help him give meaning to what he feels. You will teach him how to express himself and he will know that no matter what happens, you accept it and are by his side.
- Do not give treats to stop the tantrum, because you will confuse him and he will understand that if he throws a tantrum he will get something in return.
- Tell him that when he calms down and feels better you can be with him and go away for a while.
- When the tantrum is over, avoid punishing him or sending him to another space, avoid embarrassing him, making him feel guilty or hitting him.
This is a way in which you will help him from a young age to express what he feels and to feel that he has support from his father, mother or close relatives. A way to prevent the non-expression of emotions from a young age.