21 tips to be a good father and educate well

Raising a child is never easy. Being a parent means taking into account a large number of aspects that can affect how our progeny can develop.

While most parents do the best they can and in most cases end up doing Well, it is common to find people with doubts about what they should do to perform their role in the best way possible.

Educate well: a challenge for parents in distress

In other words, it is not uncommon to wonder what to do to be a good father (or mother). Therefore, in this article you can find a series of tips to be a good father and provide a stimulating environment and encourage proper physical and mental development.

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1. Communicate and listen to your children

Children need to be shown interest in them, they need to feel important to their loved ones. Listening to what they have to say, their experiences and concerns, implies that we care and are interested in them.

Likewise, the adult must also share his thoughts and emotions in a way that shows trust and allows a close bond. It is very important to talk to the children and not to the children.

2. Share and spend time with them

The presence or absence of a particular parental figure is a very influential factor in the development of a child.

Even if continuous contact is not possible due to work aspects, the time spent with the children must be enriching and active so that it is experienced as something motivating and exciting. Talk, read, play, teach them things or go on excursions with them.

3. set an example

It's easy to tell someone what to do, but what you end up learning It's what we see others do. Our children will imitate the behavior they observe at home. We must make our speech and our actions go hand in hand so that the child learns based on coherence.

Likewise, activities such as doing household chores, reading or playing sports are easily carried out if the child observes that his reference figures tend to carry them out.

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4. show affection

It has been shown that the fact that both parents carry out displays of affection with their children improves the level of happiness and self-esteem of the latter. Show your love and affection for your children directly is essential. It makes children feel accepted and loved.

It is about making them see that you love them unconditionally. They also learn to show affection towards others and that such expression is not inappropriate or embarrassing.

5. set limits

It is essential that the child have some marked limits (although flexible), facing know what to do and how far they can go. Being overly permissive will cause you to have no pattern by which to guide her behavior.

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6. Don't compare him to others

Making comparisons with other people can make the child think that he is not good enough or that he is appreciated or should appreciate himself based on what others have or do. Besides, this harms the parent-child relationship, as well as it can harm the possible relationship of the child with the people with whom she is compared.

7. praise their achievements

Very often people highlight the bad things that others do, while when they do something well we tend to consider that what should have been done and no mention is made of it.

It is important for a child that when he does something well or meets an objective or achieves it be praised and celebrated by the parents. In this way the child sees her good behavior reinforced. This is one of the most useful tips to be a good parent in order to enhance the learning of the little ones.

8. Do not overprotect him: give him space

A typical mistake of many parents is the idea of ​​continually protecting their child, trying to limit possible situations that could harm them. But overprotection prevents the individual from learning and growing and makes it difficult for them to be able to make their own decisions. Let him fall and make his own mistakes.

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9. Avoid stiffness

An overly rigid parenting style can lead to a fearful and insecure pattern of thinking and behavior, overreactivity, or inflexible and limited behavior.

There needs to be some flexibility that shows that things can change, that there are different points of view. The reasons for the decisions must be explained to them. It is about providing limits and a certain order but without becoming a tyrant.

10. Take an interest in his worldview

They may not have an adult's level of understanding of the situation, but children also generate their own opinions about the world. Ask for your opinion It allows us to get to know our child better and can serve to clear doubts and fears in the minor, in addition to making him see that her opinion is important and valid.

11. No to overextension

It is positive to believe in the possibilities of our children and motivate them to act and maximize their potential. However, we must be careful not to demand too much from them too quickly. Each person advances in life at the speed that he can, and if he is demanded excessively, he can end up blocking himself and / or causing frustration and the feeling that nothing you achieve is enough.

12. don't yell at them

Sometimes the behavior of children can have negative effects and provoke a certain level of anger. However, misbehaving is not a reason to yell at them. Shouting is a humiliating and painful act for them and does not fix the situation. It is preferable to calmly explain to them why their performance is not correct and what results it has, including possible punishments.

13. Answer your doubts

Childhood and adolescence are times in which the youngest begin to observe different aspects of reality, discovering a large amount of information. The world is complex and what we observe can generate a lot of doubts. Answering them means increasing the information of the progeny regarding the different aspects of reality, while allowing a greater bond with them.

14. Do not repress her emotions or yours

Repressing emotions, whether the child's or your own, can cause the child to see them as a weakness or something aversive that must be hidden. It is highly recommended help its expression both directly and indirectly (through drawings or games).

For example, If a relative dies, it is not bad to cry in front of the minor, since this teaches him that it is not bad to express sadness. This is necessary both for positive emotions such as joy or love and for negative emotions.

15. watch your expectations

It is logical that when a child is born, its parents think about what it will be like when it grows up and how they would like it to live life. However, we must try not to make excessively rigid expectations.

You and your children are not the same person. We must not try to make them live the life that we would like to have lived, but we must support them to live the life they themselves want to live.

16. be consistent

Ambivalence in the treatment of minors, in the application of rules or the fact of not having clearly established limits, supposes a high level of confusion for the developing child.

If you punish him for something but then buy him a toy to make him happy, you cause a mixed message in which he won't know if something is right or wrong. The same happens if the rules change depending on who obeys them. It is necessary to be consistent when acting.

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17. Admit your mistakes and accept theirs

We may be tempted to be heroes to our children., someone who is never wrong and does everything right. However, everyone makes mistakes. Recognizing them means that the child is able to see the mistake not as something embarrassing but something from which he can improve.

Explain the mistake and why it is an opportunity for learning and acquisition of values ​​such as honesty. In the same way, it is necessary to accept that children make mistakes and not criticize or shame them for it, but understand and support them.

18. Create a respectful family environment

It is very important for proper development to have an adequate family climate that generates positive stimulation and allows the acquisition of confidence and different values. This implies that we not only have to focus on the child as a being, but also also in the environment that we are offering.

The relationship between the parents, their social life and participation in the community are aspects that will somehow end up being recorded in the mind of the minor.

19. educate him

It may seem obvious, but it is important to participate in education of the children Show them a way of seeing the world, teach them to act and how society and the environment that surrounds them works, establish limits and transmit Norms and values ​​such as respect, tolerance and coexistence are elements of great importance for the efficient and adaptive development of the minor.

20. Don't obsess over being a perfect parent

Although these tips are designed to reflect on and visualize different important aspects in the education of a boy or girl, we should not become obsessed with the idea of ​​doing everything well. There will be times when you feel bad, when you lose patience, when you don't realize that something is wrong with your child, when you cannot be present or that for some reason you make different mistakes.

Thinking that we must always be perfect is detrimental since spontaneity is lost and it appears to be something forced, thus reducing credibility. In addition, the child is transmitted the idea that we must always be exquisite in our dealings with others, which It can cause him to be excessively demanding in his relationships, both on his part towards others and towards the reverse.

21. being a father is forever

Being a father is something for life. It's not something we can put down whenever we want or something that has an expiration date when, when the child comes of age. Our adult children may not depend on us in the same way as in their childhood, but we must always be available to them.