Spoiled kids: 10 signs to spot them
The education of children is decisive so that they do not grow up as spoiled children. Many parents think that giving everything to their little ones will ensure that they grow up healthy and intellectually stimulated, but in reality this strategy often goes wrong.
In fact, spoiling children can be detrimental to their development and turn them not only into capricious, non-conforming children and lacking in social skills, but also into adults incapable of managing frustration. In adulthood, the consequences of having had it all in the early years can be even worse than in childhood, with serious relational problems and poor emotional health.
- Related article: "What is emotional intelligence? Discovering the importance of emotions"
It is often the fault of the parents.
Parents often believe they are doing the right thing, and even with the best of intentions, a child can be spoiled. Some of the Parental Behaviors That Can Raise Spoiled Children are the following:
- Make them feel like the center of the universe.
- Do not reinforce their positive behavior.
- Reinforce negative behaviors.
- Not enforcing the rules consistently.
- Do not impose limits on children.
- Give in to tantrums.
- Giving gifts to the children when he is not playing.
- Acting (the father) like a spoiled child.
You can go deeper into these points in this article: “The 8 basic tips to avoid spoiling your child”
How are spoiled children?
How is it possible to recognize spoiled children? In the following lines you can find a list of signals to detect them.
1. Get angry frequently and have constant tantrums
If something characterizes spoiled children it is their attitude toward parents and other individuals with whom they interact. Since they always get what they want, they do not need to develop negotiation skills nor are they able to understand that today other points of view differ from their own.
They are also not empathetic if they don't have what they want at the time they want it, they become aggressive and their tantrums surface. It is easy to see a spoiled child even threatening his parents, as they always think that they are right and gain power over the parents over time.
2. They don't mind embarrassing you in public
This attitude in which they get angry frequently and unleash their tantrums is not only limited to the home environment, but they can carry it out anywhere, even in public. They often embarrass their parents. with this attitude in which it is appreciated that they do not understand where the limits of their behavior are.
3. You avoid conflict at all costs
It is easy to see parents fed up, to the point that many times they even avoid conflicts and agree with their children.
The little ones know that they will get away with it, and... so why change? This becomes a vicious circle, in which the child knows that he gets what he wants by acting like this and the father avoids conflicts with his problematic son, which reinforces the behavior of the latter who maintains this challenging behavior.
The child understands that his attitude is constantly rewarded and his negative behavior is reinforced.
- You may be interested in: "Operant Conditioning: Main Concepts and Techniques"
4. They don't help
Not acquiring social skills also affects the relationship with others, so spoiled children are not cooperative (not only with parents), but rather selfish. They will not participate in household chores because they don't need it. They go it alone, and this is also seen in their relationships outside the family.
5. they are disobedient
Disobedience is one of the characteristic traits of spoiled children, because they have always done what they wanted when they wanted. And it is that as the years go by, it becomes more difficult to redirect the child towards another type of attitude and behavior.
The pattern is one of continuous disobedience and hostility towards authority figures, and causes important problems in family life.
6. They constantly challenge
In addition to being naughty, these children are defiant, so they never take “no” for an answer or do anything that is asked of them. They always get defensive and become aggressive. They are generally intolerant children, who do not want to follow the rules and ignore parents when they recriminate them.
- Related article: "Positive Punishment and Negative Punishment: how do they work?"
7. They do not show an altruistic attitude
Sharing is not always easy, especially at a young age, but many children can display altruistic behavior if they are well behaved. From the age of 4, it is more frequent that the little ones begin to share their toys or your food with the people around you. The selfishness of the pampered little ones means that they are not children who like to share.
- Maybe you're interested. "Lawrence Kohlberg's theory of moral development"
8. You have to bribe them to behave as you want
Being defiant and never wanting to do what is asked of them, makes them always go against it. Anything that is asked of them becomes a drama and a conflict, from which they always emerge stronger. That is why many parents choose to bribe them to meet your expectations. For example, saying “if you eat the food I will take you to the park”.
9. nothing satisfies them
Spoiled children are children who they don't value what they haveBecause they always get what they want. They are dissatisfied children and they tend to want more and more. This not only happens when they are little, but into adulthood they continue to have this behavior, which makes them tremendously unhappy people.
10. They try to control you at all costs
Spoiled children end up having control over their parents, since they always get their way in the end. Some of them directly ignore when asked something, but others confront and exercise control even with authority figures who are part of your family. If the parents decide to give in to avoid conflict, the child receives the message that he has the power to do whatever he wants.