Emotionally dependent people: their 8 characteristics

Emotionally dependent people are an example of the extent to which some individuals are capable of linking their lives to that of others. And it is that although apparently we all seem free, chaining ourselves to the decisions of others can become habitual; in some cases, to clearly harmful extremes.

In this article we will review the characteristics that define emotionally dependent people, and the habits and signs that indicate the presence of this pattern of thought and behavior.

• Related article: "Emotional dependence: pathological addiction to your sentimental partner"

Emotionally dependent people: what are they like?

In theory, all human beings are unique, unrepeatable and with a constant personality; however, that does not mean that our way of thinking, feeling and acting is not influenced to its core by our interaction with others.

In most cases, the influence that an individual has over another person is limited, sometimes becoming somewhat deeper due to persuasion. However, some people are more prone to developing dependent emotional bonds towards others. In this case, your actions are totally mixed with the acts of that other person.

how to recognize these signs that indicate that we are facing an emotionally dependent person? The main ones are the ones you can read below.

1. Feelings of inferiority and low self-esteem

This is a constant in emotionally dependent people. They are cruel to themselves they have a very damaged self-image and their style of attributing causes to what happens to them leads them to blame themselves when something bad happens and attribute everything to luck or to others when something good happens to them.

Thus, this low self-esteem makes it natural to seek the protection and guidance of some authority figure, someone who can watch over you and lead your life to a successful conclusion.

2. hesitant attitude

Emotionally dependent people are constantly in doubt, and their actions are marked by indecision. The reason is not simply a lack of assertiveness (you can be assertive knowing clearly what you want) but, simply, you do not believe in your own criteria to set objectives.

In the context of relationships or friendships, for example, this means that takes a passive role and action is taken only when the other person has clearly indicated the lines to follow.

3. Guilty feeling

This feature is also explained by the previous two, and consists of the ease with which that emotionally dependent people assume that the bad things that are happening around them are their blame. For example, if your partner is frustrated that she hasn't achieved one of her work goals for the day, they think they haven't been supportive enough.

This characteristic makes it easy for them to assume situations of abuse directed against them as normal, since they blame themselves for the anger that gives way to violence.

4. belief in romantic love

In Western societies, emotionally dependent people strongly believe in romantic love, as it expresses the ultimate dependency bond between two people. In practice, this means that the other person has clear power over them, since the challenge of continuing with them despite the fact that they break their commitments is in itself an incentive.

5. Unlimited altruism

This type of person is also characterized by investing what is necessary in the emotional bonds that they have already created. That's why, they tend to sacrifice themselves over and over again for other people, even if it is not reciprocal (something that is usual). This is not done freely, as a result of reflection, but systematically, and as a reaction to the fear that breaking contact with that person produces.

Somehow, the personal relationships of the emotionally dependent person mortgage them, making them less free in the future.

• You may be interested in: "Altruism: development of the prosocial self in children"

6. The fear of loneliness

Loneliness is a terrifying thing for emotionally dependent people, and that is why they bet everything on the card to be united with someone. They do this by making great sacrifices in order to be accepted and, in general, to be relevant to someone. The result is disastrous, because have a reason for constantly denying their autonomy and complying with the demands of others.

7. Submission

Another of the fundamental characteristics of this psychological profile is submission and a complacent character. They fear the idea of ​​exhausting the patience of the one to whom the individuals with whom they are emotionally attached, and they try to satisfy all the demands; sometimes even needs that have not been expressed.

8. Difficulty perceiving manipulation

Emotionally dependent people often fall into manipulation because of the characteristics mentioned above. In those situations, they do not recognize that they are being manipulated, since that would make them fall into the cognitive dissonance: the idea that the other person is taking advantage of the situation collides with the belief that maintaining that relationship is beneficial.

• You may be interested in: "Manipulative People Have These 5 Traits In Common"