How to learn to be well alone? And benefits of being alone

Loneliness is something that all of us experience at some point in our lives. It is not about literal loneliness but about periods where we are lonelier or where we simply feel alone even though we are surrounded by people.. Of course, chosen solitude is not the same as imposed solitude, but if we learn to be alone at times, when we are faced with imposed solitude we will be able to cope with it better or even enjoy it.

The taboo of loneliness

Normally they have made us see that being alone is a bad thing, that we have to be with people, make plans with other people and that if we are alone it means that something is wrong with us.. How are you going to go alone? Are you going to do it alone? And so on, countless questions that question that loneliness.

The networks have also “helped” to have this negative perception of loneliness since we see profiles full of photos where everyone makes a lot of plans, with people of course and very fun. Obviously, all this in appearance, but it is enough for us to believe it to the point that when we are alone we really feel bad about it and believe that something is wrong.

Perhaps this belief is what makes us afraid of loneliness. Sometimes it is not fear as such, but we do feel uncomfortable. And since we try so hard sometimes to not be alone, we don't learn to do it..

We don't learn to be with our thoughts, with our boredom and our emotions and when due to circumstances we are, we have a bad time, we get overwhelmed and we want to escape from there as much as possible. before. It's not about having to choose between being alone or with people, it's about finding the balance where there can be both and we can be fine in both one state and the other.

What are the benefits of being alone?

These are the advantages that solitude has on us:

• Your refuge: You create a space where you can do and undo things in your own way, at your pace and in your own time. Without pressure, comments or conditions. You completely own everything that happens in that space.

• Self-knowledge: It's a good opportunity to get to know each other. Being alone helps us find what we like to spend that time on, to see how we feel and what kind of thoughts come to our heads.

• Time for you: It is a time that we can spend on our interests or concerns or simply do nothing and enjoy it, because sometimes Being with people takes effort, to continue a conversation or put on a good face when we don't feel like it or make a plan that we don't feel like. we want.

• To experience: Having commitments all the time, stress and lack of time makes us postpone things that we want to do or that interest us and we never find the time. Being alone allows us to put everything on the back burner and do those things.

• To realize: Going so fast through life means that we rarely stop. In that solitude we can stop and realize which things in our lives work, which not so much, and from there make decisions and make changes.

• Self-confidence: Improves self-esteem and self-confidence because seeing ourselves alone, doing things for ourselves, solving things, feeling that we are owners of our time and ourselves feels great and makes us stronger.

So start doing things alone, being alone, not paying attention to what people say. Learn to know and understand yourself alone. Look at what makes you uncomfortable or afraid or worried about being alone and try to look at it head on and solve it so that it stops being a problem for you and you don't have to run away from yourself. You can learn to enjoy company and enjoy yourself.