Why are some relationships doomed to failure?
We all undoubtedly look for the same thing in a relationship, for it to prosper and be lasting, after all, who would not want to have a happy ending with their partner?
Love relationships are built from a mutual attraction that over time, experiences and sharing becomes a strong bond that unites both people in the same direction while love is present in each moment of time between two.
However, not all relationships achieve this goal and prevail for long no matter how much effort is put into it. This occurs when the feelings that people have for the other seem to be extinguished or the conflicts that abound between them overshadow the good times.
- It may interest you: "5 signs to detect a toxic relationship"
But... Why do some couples manage to make their relationship work and others don't? Even if they go through similar difficulties or have the same tools to their advantage. If you want to find out, stay in this article where We'll talk about the reasons why some relationships are doomed and the signs that indicate this..
What do we call a successful relationship?
We can define a successful love relationship as those couples who manage to form a deep commitment that allows them maintain an adequate, healthy and beneficial balance for both parties regarding respect, complicity, support and love. Where they both manage to understand that the relationship requires constant work so that it can be strengthened and that Happiness is not synonymous with conformity or whims, but with a mutual effort to contribute to growth of the other.
Something very important that these couples have in common is that they manage to see obstacles as a natural part of love relationships. and they do not take it personally, that despite being difficult moments that can fill one or both parties with insecurity, they are capable of finding a favorable solution for both.
Another point in favor is that they consider that to make the other person happy and love them completely, it is necessary to do it with yourself first, because no one is responsible for someone's complete happiness more. Thus, they understand that, to receive, one must give and that the couple is on an equal footing in demands, rights and duties.
Why then do relationships fail?
Taking all this into account, we will explain a little why relationships tend to fail for some cases. It is logical that the answer is that, they do the opposite of what we already exposed previously and it is like that. Failed relationships are those that simply cannot remain stable for long, but enter a perpetual conflict that damages those involved to such an extent that the only relief they can get is when they are separated.
This is for many reasons, from continuous misunderstandings to personality clashes. that turn each moment into an ordeal, usually this can be perceived with time and differences that exist in every attempt to share, but there are some whose fatal fate can be predicted from the beginning.
Here are some reasons why relationships are doomed.
1. Toxic relationships
The so popular and in a way lauded toxic relationships have been incredibly normalized, accepted and even desired by young people today, without knowing what the emotional damage represents in a relationship that is constantly conflict. ‘Toxic’ relationships are based on one or both parts of the couple having a harsh, punitive and selfish character, where control and jealousy prevail over love and mutual respect.
They are highly desired because the 'toxic' person as someone strong and powerful who is able to please and protect the other, when in reality he only seeks his own satisfaction. Little by little the relationship stops looking like a passionate romance of juvenile literature to being a nightmare of the reality from which they now seek to escape.
2. Stop being your priority
You can know that a relationship is going to a point of no return when your partner is no longer a priority for you or you have stopped being a priority for the other. This refers to the fact that the person has other preferences that they are excited or want to do before spending quality time with you and if it does, tends to claim you or be in a bad mood for being there ‘imprisoned’ instead of enjoying the place where it wants to be.
This leads to distancing, arguments and a disconnection so great that it is impossible to recover what once was. Every day those details that brought happiness to both are forgotten and each time the enthusiasm of staying together is lost. This is the result of being focused on individual needs rather than the needs of the couple.
3. Chemistry runs out
This saying of 'it's over because passion is over' is not just a saying, it is a reality. When there is no longer any chemical and sexual attraction in a couple, they stop looking for reasons to stay together and it is even almost a hassle to have the other person by your side, as you feel like they are stealing your space personal. In this case, you want to do things more independently and be as far away from your partner as possible, reaching the point of starting to flirt with someone else or fantasize about another person.
Remember that sex is more than a carnal act of passion, it is a union of both parties and if it does not exist, then that bond is lost.
4. Butt insecurities
It is normal for one of the parties in the couple to have feelings of insecurity from time to time, well be with their physique, with their contribution to the relationship, with their future or with the reciprocity of their feelings. But when a person is in constant decline and feels that they are worthless or not enough for the partner, it can be a sore point that heralds the failure of the relationship.
We must remember that no one is responsible for the happiness of the other and that we must love ourselves to love someone else. But it is also important to note that both parties should feel loved by their partner and when you don't get a compliment or recognition right away, then why stay there?
5. Control and dominance
Returning a little to the issue of so-called ‘toxic relationships‘ we will emphasize the constant control and dominance that one person can show over another. In general, this is also a sign of insecurity and is done to avoid deception or abandonment, resorting to tactics such as emotional blackmail and threats.
Therefore, we must be attentive to this pattern of jealousy, deviation from themes, focus only on the emotions and needs of a single person and devaluation of the other. Your partner should make you feel safe, loved and help you grow as a person by not attacking your self-esteem.
6. They do not solve the problems
Nobody likes to go through problems in the relationshipMoreover, we always try to have a dynamic such that conflicts are minimal, but they always appear and we have to face them in order to move forward. However, there are those who, instead of doing so, postpone it, which causes tensions, resentments and pains to accumulate. growing with each small act that is observed as negative in the other person, until everything explodes and chaos takes over the relationship.
7. Empty promises
Each one has responsibilities within a couple since that is what commitment is about, but when one of them delegates all responsibility to the other instead of taking charge of their actions, then the relationship is not running. Remember that, although it is important to accept the strengths and weaknesses of both, also They must be aware that if they do not make changes to improve their attitudes it will only bring mistrust in the relationship, breaking with the security of the couple.
8. Sharing feels obligated
There are couples who show off their romance in every place they can while others are more private and both cases are fine as long as the parties agree. However, When one of them shows obvious annoyance, despair and little enthusiasm in sharing with the other, something goes very wrong, since quality time in the couple is essential and necessary for them to know each other better and to reinforce the bond and when going out becomes an obligation then it is not enjoyed at all to be with that person.
9. You get upset about everything
Getting angry from time to time with your partner is also normal, since there is a friction between what you can consider correct and that person does not do it, for this it is important to communicate it and reach an agreement mutual. But when every detail that I do begins to affect you, that your whims do not please you, that you must agree all the time, that you feel that it hurts your feelings every time you argue, then the relationship is not on the right track, because it is not only about you, your partner also has feelings.
Another factor to highlight at this point is that negative reviews, complaints and ridicule are constant, so it is no longer possible to perceive the good in the relationship and it is normal for your partner to question whether there ever was.
10. You move away from the rest of the people
Many couples end their relationship when they realize they have lost more than they have gained. And although there were moments of happiness, they could not notice that they lived in a bubble of false perfection that was only taking them away from their loved ones. The fact that your partner is bothered by your friendships, the time you dedicate to yourself, constant communication with their family or making new relationships, it can lead you to a point of extreme fatigue from which you should move away before.
11. Dream incompatibility
Something very important for a relationship to prevail in the future is that both can share the same goals and be clear about their wishes for their lives. But when they do not make themselves known or do not agree at all with the other, then the relationship can go downhill and cause a lot of emotional damage by feeling stuck.