The 12 myths about romantic love (and why they are false)

How beautiful is love! There is no doubt about that statement, love fills us with energy, joy and enthusiasm., helps us to face the day to day with a positivity that is considerably increased around us, so that if we give love, it is most likely that we will receive love in return.

The best thing is that this feeling is everywhere, in what we enjoy doing, in curiosities discovered, in gifts, smiles or words of encouragement, which makes it an element abundant.

However, there is a particular kind of love that everyone wants to have in their lives, they hope to achieve at some point and enjoy it to the fullest, the romantic love. That feeling that leads you to look for a person with whom you can share the rest of your life, that not only have the same emotional tune as you, but share goals, dreams and wishes for him future.

Although, it is precisely because of all the expectations that people may have about others, it is that this ‘love romantic ’ends up becoming an unattainable illusion that can turn into a disappointment painful It is because of this duality, as well as the passions involved (happiness and sadness) that have been created different stories in his name and by which many even today are carried away or decide believe.

Whether in a metaphorical or traditional sense, these myths have crossed the barriers of the world and history, would you like to know any? Then read the following article, where you will know those myths about romantic love that exist in the world and various ways of clearly seeing its degree of falsity.

12 myths about romantic love that can be easily dismantled

These myths are part of the traditions of some world cultures and have also been used to describe the form of love in different artistic works. The important thing It is knowing how to decipher what part of the truth they have and what part we can discard because it is the result of a cultural imposition.

1. Half orange

The perfect match It is the oldest love myth in history, so much so that its origins go back to the time of Plato, reflected in his work 'The banquet' in which it states that all the people in the world are incomplete beings and that is why it is destined to look for the other half for the rest of life, until everyone can have that ideal person, who is always waiting in a specific place, at a specific time and who fits perfectly with each who.

This idea raises the belief that we are actually tied to a specific person, which many use as a justification for their previous relationships that have failed or not improve their attitudes towards love, since they ‘cannot find the right person’ who loves them such and such They are.

The reality is that each one has the potential to develop a suitable loving relationship with a person with whom he can share each aspect of his life and that between them they can help each other grow, instead of living in a bubble of false perfection that can be broken at any time. instant. It is important to understand that we are already complete beings, we do not need someone else to be happy and love should not be conditioned by a myth.

2. Love at first sight

Another of the most common myths about love, but what do you think? Can someone really fall in love at first sight? It is true that a person can feel a certain degree of physical attraction or dazzling towards another who he meets for the first time, either because of his appearance, the attitude he shows or the energy he projects. Characteristics that can tell a lot about someone, but that is not enough to know him completely, however, this is not impediment for those who firmly believe they have been arrowed and that fate is putting the love of their lifetime.

This myth leads to developing distorted beliefs about expectations towards the other person. For example, you can attribute extra qualities that you do not possess, giving way to disappointment, basing a relationship on the passion of the moment instead of taking the time to get to know each other or even blind oneself to the defects of the other person.

3. Exclusive couples

The myth of exclusivity tells us that it is impossible to feel attracted to someone else while you are in a relationship, since finding your partner and your heart has been conquered and set apart by forever. Which, even if relationships are stormy or people are unhappy, they feel compelled to stay true to their partner, at the cost of their own stability.

The truth is that loyalty is a social construction product of a commitment acquired by ourselves, as a sign of the importance of the relationship and the path that both want travel. But that is precisely the key for fidelity to be successful, for both of you to agree on the choices you make as a couple.

It is common to feel a certain degree of attraction to someone else while in a relationship but it is your own decision if you succumb to these desires because this affinity is not a sign that you no longer love your partner.

4. Omnipotent love

This is the belief that love can do everything, You can cope with any adversity, conflict or estrangement that any couple may be going through, when this is totally false. Love is not enough, because a relationship needs constant work and dedication from both parties so that they can move towards the same goal.

Although, there is an opposite pole where this belief makes people tend to separate abruptly and unnecessarily when any type occurs. of problem in the couple, since perfect relationships do not go through any adversity and if it happens, it is only a sign that they are not made to be together. Which again is wrong, all couples go through difficulties and by going through them they can strengthen their ties and grow.

5. Pairing

This myth is based on the belief that there is a ‘prototype of a couple’ to which each one must aspire, that is, a heterosexual and monogamous couple because that has always been the case. Idea that is completely wrong since both homosexuality and infidelities or polygamy has in fact been around for a long time.

Couple love as we know it is conditioned by multiple cultural, evolutionary, social and religious factors. So that there is no opinion that you have to follow to the letterYou can create your own rules with your partner, as long as you both agree on the direction you want to take in the relationship.

6. Opposites attract

Surely you have heard that opposites attractThat is, two people who are always arguing or fighting is because they secretly love each other, but this is not always the case. Although our partner may have different tastes or opinions from us, there must be a certain degree of rapport, something that you both enjoy doing, share, or have common ideals that helps make the relationship fruitful for both of them.

7. The myth of coexistence

Also known as the myth of marriage, in which It is suggested that a couple can be really happy after the daily coexistence and commitment to spend every day together, even if they have had certain conflicts or differences in their courtship that point to a possible failure in the future. This idea is based on the fact that the highest point of a couple must be marriage, because otherwise they can never be happy or a complete couple, because that is what everyone is looking for, isn't it?

Well, not really, there are many couples who have a happy and full life without the need to marry and that is not synonymous with failure or that there is no love between them.

8. The ideal person

Another of the most common myths, which may be related to the myth of the better half, but in this we focus more on the idea that the ideal person is one who is capable of filling every aspect of our life completely or that we are responsible for the happiness of the other.

Since the ideal is to share all the affinities, tastes, beliefs and opinions that it is as if it were a single person, but this is not a written law for a relationship works, since each one must commit to their own happiness, to collaborate in the growth of the other and above all to love themselves to love the other.

9. Feeling jealous is synonymous with love

This in addition to being a wrong idea is very dangerous, since it is believed that jealousy is a reliable demonstration of the love that one person has for another. As a consequence, jealousy is normalized as something positive, instead of being seen as an insecurity of its own that manifests itself in any aspect even if it is unrelated Some with an infidelity, reaching the extreme of controlling the spouse in order to be sure that no betrayal occurs, but at the cost of the other losing her freedom.

10. Myth of passion

Many people believe that the romantic passion that is engendered by falling in love lasts throughout the relationship and when this decreases or changes in any way, it is then synonymous with that the relationship has reached its final. Because there is the belief that love is explosive, when in reality it has many facets, among these, the tranquility, but this does not mean that the passion has ended, but everything On the contrary, it is now possible to enjoy passion in any aspect of what is shared with the partner.

11. Myth of infatuation

In addition to the previous myth, there is the myth of falling in love, which states that an ideal relationship is one that is always in constant love, when this is really only experienced in the first months of the relationship to make way for concrete and firm love.

Infatuation and love are not the same thing and we must clarify that point, when we are in love we feel overwhelmed with emotions and want to be intimately with that person, but when the relationship settles, this overwhelming despair changes to a feeling of deeper tranquility and this does not mean that you no longer feel love for the person, but that this love has evolved by one more permanent.

12. Sexual penetration

Those who have great intimacy chemistry and a passionate and constant sexual relationship is enough for them to become a stable and happy couple. It may well be the case, but it is not necessarily a written law that is complied with in each case. There are couples who only enjoy casual sex with another because of their level of physical attraction and not because they have a romantic interest in it, because good sex is not a guarantee of a love relationship ideal.

The same thing happens with the opposite side, romantic love is not a guarantee of a good sexual rapport in the couple. So it is necessary to fully know our body and talk about sexual experiences, desires and preferences so that when that moment comes, it is the best possible intimacy.

Did you know any of these myths before or have you followed one?