Loyalty: an old-fashioned word?

Despite the new forms of couples and the openness that society has shown towards the subject, infidelity continues to cause controversy. There are relationships that range from the conservative, maintaining a single partner throughout their lives, to those who agree to share their partner with more than five people.

Given this, a rejection or acceptance can be seen depending on the culture in which the bond has been formed; However, at present there is a certain curiosity to try a new way of establishing rules within a couple relationship. Is the concept of fidelity out of date?

Monogamy and fidelity

Monogamy is a term that means "a union", referring to both sexual and sentimental exclusivity, either with a person of the same sex or with one of the opposite sex.

Within monogamy too variations arise from one pair to another, even more so with the technological advancement of recent years, where to maintain constant communication with another person through from a social network, send or receive provocative photos, match someone within a geosocial application, etc. it can be considered infidelity.

Open Relationships and Polyamory

There is a marked difference between open relationships and polyamory. The first concept tells us about a mutual agreement where it is allowed to have occasional sexual relations with other people, as long as feelings are not involved, unlike polyamory, in which there is no sexual or sentimental exclusivity, on the condition that both members of the relationship agree to it. In this way, an individual can maintain a sexual and affective relationship with more than one person.

Polyamory is common in some Islamic nations, where not only sexual and emotional relationships are allowed with other people, but it is also acceptable for a man to be married to several women simultaneously.

Why was he unfaithful?

As mentioned earlier, when thinking about the concept of "infidelity" we find a great variety of definitions, depending on the beliefs and the meaning that each person attributes to the word; therefore, it is not possible to generalize believing that all the people are unfaithful for the same reason or that they do it in the same way.

Despite the fact that certain research shows that the main cause of infidelity is looking for characteristics in another person that the current partner does not satisfies, understanding an act of infidelity, from the causes to knowing whether to forgive it or not, depends on the meaning that was given to that word from the beginning of the relationship.

• Related article: "Is it possible to forgive an infidelity?”

Putting loyalty aside is no easy task

The fact that an infidelity causes pain in the deceived person comes from the sense of possession that is held over the other, in which fidelity is synonymous with love and if the couple ceases to be "property" of the other being involved sexually or affectively with someone else, then breaks with the idea that one has about him love; Because monogamy is the phenomenon that, mainly in Western cultures, has been transmitted generation after generation as the correct and most socially accepted thing.

On the other hand, having betrayed a mutual agreement between the couple and continuously lying to cover up the infidelity It can be more painful than accepting a betrayal in time or knowing that either of the two members of the couple you may be attracted to another person at any time.

Therefore, it is not a question of assuming that there is no faithful human on earth and considering polygamy as something natural. It is about understanding that infidelity is a possibility and a risk that is run by being in a relationship. However, suffering and misunderstandings can be avoided if communication is maintained from the beginning assertive, where everyone expresses the expectations they have of the relationship in question.